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                    <text>GAME OF LOVE

'"I'bony nod h s mother, Catbe and A m died for tbe sak
i
of Love m k W

Price &amp;jd

��THEY
IEB A THE
N
GAME OF LOVE
"Thony and his mother, Cathe and Agnes died
for the sake o f Love making"

Obtainable From:-

NJOKU &amp; SONS BOOKSHOP,
C/e

No 6 Aroodizuogu Street.
ONITSHA-NIGERIA.

Price

216

�CONTENTS

Pages
Short Poem on corn:r cerner love
S
Questions and Answers for bo!s &amp; girls
7
Advicc for boys and girls on love making
8
l'hony in th: game of love
12
Cathc visited Anthony's room
17
'Thony kissed Cathe in Cathe's room
20
~ h o b yin second year in thc school
21
Letter arrives to Thony for Cathe's pregnancy
26
At the hospital Cathe-sanga song and died
27
Thoay once morc in the school
28
lguabo Thony's father marries another wife
33
Thony's completion of Secondary Education
34
Thony at the Ambassador Hotel befriended Agnes 35
Agnes back to thc shoo1
38
Agnes in a family way
33
Discussions within Agnes an2 Anthony and their
4I
vicit to a Native Doctor's house
Thony back to the doctor's house
b
r
~ h o n ; kil~hd himself for isve's sake
i3
Author's Advicc
44

�PREFACE

This Novel, "They died in the game of Love" is
designed to serve as' a lesson to some of our boys
and girls who feel that there is aoother heaven in
the game of love.

It narrates of a boy called Thony-the only born
of his pareots who was madly in love with a girl
called Cathe.
Not quite long, the girl was put in a family way
when both of them were in Secondary Schools.
As a result of this, the girl died in the hospital.
The girl's parents, and ,the parents of Aothony
quarrelled on the issue and thereby fighting arose,
of which Thony's mother died, and others inflicted
serious injuries among themselves.
Not quite long, Thony got another girl called
Agnes in love and put her in family way again.
While trying to put the child out, the lady died.
At 'last, Thony realising the state he drank
posion and died in his bed room.

�FORWARD
It takis many people lone intcrval to make a world.
And sometimes 1 enjov meeting !he no!, too. ordinarv t y v n of joung-!en in manner. !:ley are the
spicc of life and stimulants to discover what to
write and !he thought they should comn~entabout.
In some of the skelchcs that follow, I see faccts
of mysclf. for in a way "I am part o f all I have
met". As TENNYSON said [hat whrre l laugh at
men's follies, it is only to proud them to recall o r
rethink tho truth is by nature ironical.
The author's natural field as I can say is pure
in the mdn3gement of social life, where boys and
girls jisphy the tinest pwxp:ios of characw. manner sentiments and emotions which giude !he
conduct of our boys.
Some may see or not see a purpose in this article.
humourous miscllanv. bu! l offer no apology either
for the style o r !he style of word which will not
alter fact that night is the day without the sun just
as a crime is discovered wrong.
In tt,e "CYRILS" Article as a finalist of 'Collins
Institutional Centre' Onitsha. H c had thought me
tbat life bath quick sands,
Lire bas also snares and much uncertainty and
ddversity pcrmeates the society o f t h e present boys
and girls. I have also read ramole widely in the
lanes and by paths of social life and the gallery
of my memory contributed a few extraordinary individuals that stand out though "Rome not built
in a day"
T o hang a few sublimes. though it's girls that
seduce all mankind but the Author has tried to
reduce the tactics in a kind of concert-play, sod
now, HERE IS T H E NEWSREEL.
ROBINSON DlBUA ( D d y Robltcu)
Collins Institutional Centre.

.

'

35 Bid. Road. ONITSHA.
SENIOR TUTOR I N
Solemwhip.

�"SEIORT POEAI 09 CORSEK CORNER LOYE"
D E A R B O Y S A N D GIRLS O F N O W A D A Y S

W e ilare so many kinds of Lore Making
(Sexual)(that's Corner Corn:r Love)rnd Natural Love.
Love is Blind and it can Make and Unmake
Boys if you wish to befriend a girl you love d o
not hops to d o sexual inlercourse with her immediately. Wait and study her way before the game
Girls if you wish to befriend a boy you love do.
not demand any gift from the boy immediately
study his ways first. B:cause when a girl demands
things from her boy friend, the boy in other hand
will demand nothing than to tell the girl to please
him that's to d o "s:xual intercoc~rse" with him.
Corner, corner love is too many nowadays.
D o you know what l mean by cornercorner love?.
Now g o through this book you will understand it
easily after reading it.
Boys and Girls bear in mind that sweet things
burn lifes easily. SOwhcre there is good there must
be bad. Nothing comes for nothing and Nothing
goes for nothing.
A WORD IS ENOUGH FOR T H E WISE.
5

�Dearly Boys and Girls of nowadays Do
You Play zig-zag with your lovers? DO
You also Play zig-zag with your Boys?
l F S O KISULY CllANCE FROM NOW AND
KXOW YOUR SELF OTIIER\VISE YOUR
hflSLEAD YOURSELF
how, Read a story of a girl who played zig-zag with
her lovers and her self and r a ~ h e rwas confused and
the advice given to her.

THE STORY READS
lam Miss Comfort Ochonma, l am in great
deal of trouble. l am in a family way and d o not
know even my three boy-friends who is the father
of the child. Please, d o not blame me for having
three boy-friends at a time. I did it to have my own
back on men whq had in thc past bloughing mc,
. lauphing at me saylng t h a ~ would not had a lover.
l
What I want now is how to get o u ~ child. I
the
have already accused each of the three boys
of being the f a ~ h e of my coming child. lnfact, this
r
accusation took a great deal of wind out of each
of them. But, none has so far registered his name
as the father of the child.
What then, shall 1 d o in order to get one of
them to confirm that he is really the father of the
child?

�AUTHOR'S ADVICE
Dear Miss Comfort infact, in this respect I can
say that you a n a fool at fobrty. I think tbat you
are up to your eyes in trouble and also think that
you are a prize of fool. You have dug your grave
and will be sealed there. I d o not think that it
would be right of me to tell you to accuse one of
your boy friends of being the father of your child.
Supposing the cbild turns out not to be? The only
thing I have to advise you is to wait until your child
is delivered you may be lucky the child may resemble one of your three boy-friends and then you
will know who is the father.

QUESTIONS &amp; ANSWERS FOR BOYS &amp; GIRLS
Q. 1.

By how is a good boy known?

Am.

Agood boy is know by salutation, respect,
obedience, devotion to his duty and quietness.

Q. 2.

In what way is a bad boy known?

Ans.

By carelessness, disobedience, stubborness,
and noise making.

Q. 3.

What type o f boys are filling up prison?

Am.

They are in majority boys who retirsed the
instruction and the advice of their parents
and their elders.

�Q. 4.
As.

By how is a good girl known?
A good girl is ktiown b) hir ihyness,
ness, respect obedience and likeness to
sric work.

Q.

5.

By how is a badgirl known?
By hck of shyness, shame. careless and
weakness to demestic dltty.

Q. 6.

IVlrar type of girls that fill up horels?
They are in mojority girls who are bad in
natureand those id10 do not want ro be
under some body.

An,.
'

Ans.

?:
$

ADVICE FOR BOYS &amp; GIRLS ON
LOVE MAKISC.
When love and peace joins together.
To stamp nature's desire.
A sympathetic lover.
Is the man's best pride.
Some pcople think that they can win one's love
by b:auty alone. No, you can one's love by beauty
and character, activity io life and ability. and or
simplicity. These things matter most in the life of
one who nccds some one's love.

I know that most of you have known what is
called love, and shodd bear in mind that love are
of different kinds, thus (a) love. ro unite two together as to benefit thcmselvcs,
that
is,
8

�man and woman, a boy and a girl. Through this
we have what is known as natural love. This proves
itself in harmonious relationship with each other
as it by nature, (b) love, to snatch ford from one's
mou~h, (c) Iove, to betray one for evil o r killing,
(d) love, t o get something otherwise from one's way
and many other kinds of love. But the on: 1 meant is
that which unties two people together for something
very beneficial.

If girl's love can be won by beauty alone it
means that ugly pcople would die bacbelc or must
not have lovers in life, but it is not so because I
hhve seen a n ugly man with a fine lady as his
lover. I have also seen a lady who loves a boy
that bas no suflicient money. Why? It is because
of boy's talent in football playing that he won her
love.

If you say that you arc vgly or, that you have
no mooey and because of that you willbe,unable
to win the love o f a girl. a lady o r a woman, that is
a big false. You may say s o because you have not
known the law guiding love. One thing to bear in
mind is this, there must b e a cause for something
that is, regarding the love 1 mean: one cannot love
r e a s o n . (a) t h e
you
without a

�reason that, you have good characters, regardless
how ugly you are, (b) the reason that, you are a
'good player or good at dance, regardless how ugly
are, (c) the reason that you are a good boxer, regardless how poor o r ugly you are. (d) the reason
hat you are commanding money, regardless whether
you are hwinp onc hand o r ono leg and, or one eye.
(e) the rcason that, you always appear neat, regardless
what town you may have come from, and (f) with
a lady or a girl, the reason that, she is beautiful o r
with good manners, regardless the home sbe may have
come from.

It is great misnomer t o say that because you
are not handsome like others, therefore you cannot
win one's love. No sir, 1 d o not at all agrce wilh
you. Please. think a while. What brings love ktween a schcol boy and a school girl, a school girl
and a native who never know how t o pronounce the
letter "A'? Wbat brings love between student and
a "on-student, and a mad man with a blind
woman? By the way what d o you think is the cause of
these things? Look, it is nothing than what we call
attractions.

Therefore, if you d o not know what woman is
t o man, or you have not got an idea bufore, mark
you, you are absent i n love, their ways cannot attract you because you have n o knowledge of it.
10

�If you do not know, infact, you are 'ust like a
child. Even children know what is called ove. Sometimes, you may see the little boys and girls hiding
themselves this way and that way for love sake.

i'

These boy: and dirk have note the idea,. which
induced them to such order of nature's prrnciple.
Yo11 should note that nature knows no law.

A reverend (priest) or a highly developed occultist claimed to denied complelely this particular law
of nature, mbrk him, he has a private and complete
and secret method (applicatinn) through which he
fulfills this order. It is really true I say, kc fulfils it
thought what is known imaginarion. Anyway, I am
not here t o discuss that matter. N o one can deny
the fact, cxecpt through something-otherways -otherwise.
convent girls who were ordered to be holy not
have friends. They after sometimes found it very
difficult t o have such law of nature through the
separation from friends. What happened? Fortunately
one day, one of the girls went out secrelly in the
night and on her way back t o their school premises
she took a boy friend. When she reached their boar.
ding house with the chap. other girls saw him and
felt very bappy as if they were in paradise.

,

�Jhky at'onc esurroundrd him and.the young c h a p The
b ~ became: afraid for: he thought!othenvisc would
y
happrn.. he- felt. that they would .take him d d W to
t h e E a ~ r o p ~ aSister, but it Wac not so. aimply.for
n
thcir own good they surrounded him. What happen~d
th:n? Each and every one of the girls began t o
b:g tb: young chap to have her first treated before
others. Then the svg~r-babybegdn on the work t o
touch. lh.*m one alter the other. Tney. were very happy a?d worried rhc chap t o ~ m u c h
that-he fainted
and wthi 1 ?O minu~eshe died there.
Tomorrow morning, it was a great shock to the
European: Sister. Then she ordered their driver to
carry the corpse (dead) down t o the hospital and
there the doctor discovered that it. war over usuagc
of the pswer within tbat caused his death.
So some of the girls adopt the m e e f candle sticks.
I t is love tbat solve this matter and nothing. else.
Remember that you can win one's love with
whatever may be your work providcd you know the
method of attraction. Man can attract woman; ladies
or girls can attract boy.
This attraction caa be fully accomplished tbrough your character.

THONY IN THE CAME OF LOVE
12

�l a Isiokwe a 'Town in Eastcro Nigeria dwelt a
wealthy man by name Jguabo. He was huge, el:gantl
and a great business man throughout the town, for
Which hla name was famous. He was kind, and
got marriod to a woman nam:d Jjeoma.
ljeoma herself was brilliant in trading. und
household korks. Both of thcm lived for several
years before she put fortb to her first son, and they
gave him the names Anthony Amechi Iguabo. During
Amhony's chidhocd, he was full of educational
desire and out doors games. Simultdocously, he
sprang up, an honest handsome boy, and had manieducational activities, and started
fested inter:sl
schooling a t the age of 8. He was brilliant at class
works, and social in all aspects, end these won admiration for him among his class-mates and school
teachers.
His handsomeness made schcolgirls rush o n him
seekiop for his love when he was 12 yean. T o all
these. he gave n o attentirn, because he never knew
the frculties of love. Many o f them were fighting
and using scandalous statements among themselves,
because of thischarming boy. Even whet1 the school was dismissed. they used t o quarrel over the
person who should carry Tbony's school box
Every corner he went, the applause of THONYI
T H O h Y !
rained
in
t h e

�air. Now this gay boy "Anthony" was in std. five and
had a year more b:fore entering a secondary school.
By all means, girls were trying to convince and eagage in love dealings with him.
The respect and shouts of admiration bestowed
on him, made him feel proud and thought of
complimentar cheers of the school girls on him. Before he finish:d his elementary course, he was
13 years, but did not want to befriend any o f t h e
girls.
Now it came t o pass that one moonlight evening, he dressed u p well and visited one of his class
mate. No sooner did he treck for some few yards
than a girl whistled a1 if in a way boys call their
girls friends, Anthony looked round swiftly, a t tbe
girl who did not- help beckoning on him to come.
He made his way quietly to tho girl who gave
him a warm welome. She immediately stretched out
her hand and handed over to Anthony a white folded
paper. He smoothly put the paper into his pocket
without asking what the paper was for. He excused
her for the meantime, and walked quietly to his
friend's bouse where he was also welcomed. He spent
30 minutes there and set out for home. On reaching
home, he sat on his bed and began to read the
contents of the w h i ~ epaper received from the girl.
"A! it was a letter", he exclained. Theletter read as
follows :-

�Cathe Obiako,
Holy Rosary School,
Isickwc Akpu!u.
10/4/5G.

-

Dear Thony,

Infact it \vss quite a long time I had been
seeking a way to be-friend )ou. Now that you are'
in possession of mine. I hope ).ou nil1 find tinle to
g o through my missive.
Never-thcles~, 1 sliould only become the queen
of the whole land if you grant my being in love
with you.

I have not much ot say, ill I see your favourable reply. 1 am,
Yours ever,
Cathe Obiako.
This 1:ttcr struck him s o deeply that he could not
belp giving hack the reply. His, went as follows:Thony A. I&amp;uabor
Community .Primary School.'
Isiokwc Akoulu.

-

Dear Cathc,
Yours o f the loth April 1956 was got. and be
contents were fully gone through.
Actually, I was totally embarrassed to getting
yours, but anyway, your request had been granted.
15

�I have seen all tbe girls in this town, and I
swear, you are only the one 1 bestow my thoughts
upon. 1 thank God, for we are now to begin the
so-called "Love dealing".
I hope to meet you again one night where we
should discuss in detail, matters of interest within
ourselves. I stop so far till I see yours in return.
Yours heart,
Thony Iguabo.
The letter was sent over to Cathe by post and
she could not express her utter gratitude on receiving such a reply from Anthony, picking up her
pen once more she wrote thus:As Usual,
Dear Sweet-heart,
Indeed I could hardly believe and express m y
utter gra~itude on receiving your favourable reply.
Today, should go down in history for being a
girl-friend to a handsome person of your type. Since
I gave my letter to to you, I have been cogitating,
dreaming, and meditating of you all night.
However, I sball be corning to your house next
week r n Wednesday. Till I come,
Yours ever,
Cathe.

�On receiving this letter, Anthony was shocked on
Cathe's coming next week, why? because all these were
happening without the knowledge of his parents.
However, he knew how to explain elerythiog to them if
she came.
CATHE VISITED ANTHONY'S

ROOM

On the day in question, being Wednesday,
Anthony woke u p earl~er and prepared his room
in order s o as t o attract the girl when she come.
His parents had all gone to their respectwe vacations,
fortunately for him, Calhe tapped rt the door.
"Who are you", he said "I am your Cathe", was
the reply, nnt minding whether Thony's parents were
in. She entered inlo the room and seated on the
bed where Thony was lying down complacantly.
My Dear, said Antho, so our dreams have now come
true? Apple of my heart, said Catha, map Z first
have a warm kiss from you before I commence".
Thony then raised up and they had a kiss. Infact
(she continued) I a m now the happiest maid ever to
live for being your girl friend. I could hardly take
anything if you are not presetat. I hank God for we
have been joined together, and what soever God has
joined, let no man put asnnder"
At thin junction, they began to enjoy what
Nature terms, "The faculties of love dealing; After
this, they kissed once-more and Cathe 'made her
way home. They remained silent . for a long
time with none writing t o each. other.

�At last Cathe's letter was got thus:
As Usual,
3/1/57,

Dear Sweet-heart,
It bas beon quite a long time we heard from
each other. However, I hope you are normal. Infact 1 could not forget that glittering morning in
your roam.
My heart is yours forever. 1 hope IOU will have
time to communicate with me more. 1 stop so far.
Yours ever,
Cathe Obiako.
On getting this, Thony did not give prompt
reply because he was away to Ubulu on an entrance examimation which he was successful. When he
r~turned, they were faced with the buying of materials for his Secondary schooling. Relaxing one
afternoon, he picked up his pen and his reply was:Tbony Iguabo,
11/1/57.

Darling,

I much regretted for having delayed the reply
of yours. Never-theless, I was confronted by matters
a r i s i q g o u t of my secondary school

�educatbn. It is a pity to narrate to you that I
shall be living for Ubulu Community Secondary
School next week. However, I hope we shall
be writing to each other constantly.
Do not shine your love on any other boy ,for

1 shall be spending all my holidays here wilb you.

Yours darling,
Thony.
Before she could get the letter, Thony had left for
school. Going through the contents, she felt annoyed
and wrote as follows:
Cathe Obiako,
Girls' Training Centre,
Obodo - Otene.
20/2/57

Dear Thony,
Indeed I was shocked by your departure to
Ubulu. How about studies? My heart is still yours.

I am now at the Girls Training Centre, ObodoOtene. Please write me when you will vacate, and
the date you will be here.
I hope to get yours sooner.
Cathe.
Cathe on the other band, fdid not make her
a ware
o her
love with
p a r e n ts
19

�Anthony. It was not long that Anthony wrote to
her informing her of his coming next week, on
holiday. His, went as follows:Anlhony Iguaho,
Ubulu Community Sec. School,
16/4/57.

Dear Catbe,
This is to make you aware that we have
vacated, and as such I shall be ooming next monday. I hope you have also vacated. Convey my
greetings to your brqther John. Till I come.
Yours darling,
Thony Iguabo.

THONY KISSED CATHE IN CATHE'S ROOM
Cathe sent her little brother John for some
refreshments. 'Tbese were brought and they relaxed
and kissed each other ceaselessly. Again they displayed what Nature calls "Faculties of Love dealing",
and Thony could not help staying longer, on the
girl's request. They kissed, relaxed and sang some
love songs once startiog with these words!
Darling! if you know you love me,
Don't forget me!

�My heart is yours ever!
"You are the sole apple of my life"
No sooner had Cathe escorted Thony than her parents
arrived back from the day's work. They looked for
Cathe, but she was not to be seen. When she was
back, they asked her where she went, she said she escorted her class mate who had just come to see her.
It did not last long before Thony went back to school
From there he wrote:Thony Iguabo,
Ubulu Community Sec. School,
10/2/60.

Darling,
Now I hope you have gone back to your school.
Infact 1 hereby offer my sincere greetings to you for
the entertainment accorded me at your room last term.
Enthusiastically, the day shduld remain unforgotten in memory. My parents bad played their games
of love and now they want to find some obstacles to
binder my being in love with you, which I cannot
tolorate.
Did your parents ask you where you went during
the time you escorted me? However, I look forward
to receiving your nice note in return.
Yours darling,
Thony Iguabo.

�It was lbree days before the letter went swiftly
into her girl's hands and she admired it much. She
replied thus:

Thony did not inform his girl that he had gone
back to school, and she one day went to investigate whether her beloved boy was in the house.
Unfortunately, she was tald that Thony had left for
school. Thony bid his father farewell, and started the
second year successfully. At the term's holidays, he
wrote to Cathe that he should visit his cousin at Ekpo
Town. To this, she felt somewhat loneliness and did
not reply.

When he was back to school, he wondered why
his girl did not reply his, and repeated again. This time,
she replied and explained the sadness and loneliness
she felt when she got the letter. Tbony replied and
appologised for not going home as he promised. Now
the second year was over, aud both of them were
successful. Both of them come home again on holidays
and had several meetings and communications. His
parents bad realised the engagement of lovedealiags.
their son had witb Catbe. This he denied abstruptly
and said that he never know anything about love.
They warned him again, that if they saw such girls
witb him agaio, they would terminate his education
forthwith. He was puzzled and thought of how to leave
his most beloved girl-friend, who was his pride, and
queen-moon that ohone upon his heart. T o all these he

�determined 10 continue his lovz with Catbe.

Without the knowledge of what was going on
between her boy friend and his parents, Cathe dressed
u p charmingly one morning and setout to his boy's
house. Anthony being fortunate, came outside their
house to relax, sighted his girl, and quickly walked
up to her and told her that his parents had warned
him not to be friend her any more. But that be did
not zgree to their warnhgs. Both of them went back
to Cathe's room and her parents had all gone to their
respective jobs.

She got the letter two days before she left school
for home, On the very day, Cathe went to the park
to welcome her boy-friend. It was not so long that
Tbonv arrived and she gave him a warm kiss and embrassment. Two of them boarded a taxi which brought
them to Thony's house. Both of went in, and his parents welcomed them warmly, and tremendously.

Ijroma'casted a look at her husband and her lips were
shaking as if to ask her son who the girl was. Thony
sent for drinks which were brought and both of them
including his parents drank the wines. Thsny escorted
her and was back again in the house. His pareat
could not help asking him who the girl was. He gave
false narrations, that she was his classmate at the Ubulu Secondary School. They strictly warned him not
to have anything done with girls, so as t o finish up
his carrear successfully.

�It was two days for him to go back to the school
tbat he got a letter from his girl that she was about
to leave for school and he on the other hand replied
that he sheuld also went back to school soon.

THONY I N SECOND YEAR IN THE SCHOOL

He went back- to the school and inspite of his
love dealings with his girl, he maintained his lead in
the class. After the first year, they began to prepare
for the second year's studies. This time, he was escorted to the School by his Dad. When they got to tb:
school, the dad inquired from the principal whether
girls were attending the school, which he inevitably
declined. "My dear readers, from here the Dad realised that his son told them false story that Cathe was
a fellow class-mate at the Ubulu Secondary School".
Cathe Obiako,
Girls Training Centre,
Obodo--Oteoe,
14/2/60.

My Dear,
Yours of the 10th instant was got and I admired
the contents. May I strongly assure you that nothing
again in this earth should cease, our love. Once our
love is ceasesd, know you my sun is set.

�Your parents are only tryinp to obstruct our ways,
but 1 pray that this youth of ours should continue to
the extent we may live.
My parents are aot all after my being in love
with any boy, therefore I hope our love is like a solid
knut tightened to a ha1 bolt.

I hereby enclose my picture, so that you should
embrasss and kiss me whenever you feel loneliness.
I stop so far, till I see yours in return.
Cathe Obiako.
Thony got this letter but delayed the reply. However he was about to reply but got another letter
from Cathe informing him openly thal she was under
pregnancy. The contents read as follows:As Usual.

zslaltio.

Dear Thony,
It is a pity to report to you that I am now in a
family way. How are wc to do? Formally I though
it was an ordinary belly-ache, but suddenly 1 noticed
my belly springing up rapidly.
To this effect, I bave written to my parents informing them of the inc:dent. Likewise, I have wri~ten
to your dad, informing him that you are the only
friend I bave, so therefore you are solely responsible
for any outcome.

I shall leave the school tomorrow for home. You
are urgently wauted at home soener.
I am,
Yours,
Cathe Obiako.
25

�"WELL READERS! You have seen the end of
Cathe's education, an3 the out-come in love dealing
with school girls. My readers kindly beware of such
girls because they are troubles.
LETTER ARRIVES 'TOTHONY FOR
Carhe's Pregnancy.
The letter arrived and he was wondering why he
never replied the first one and thereby got another.
Without hesitation, he opened it and went tbrough
the contents. Immediately he saw the head-lines of
the letter, 'yr is a pity to report to you that I am now
itra family way", he dropped the letter and went into
the school domerory, and wept bitterly. Fearing that
his father would terminate his schooling, he took
permission from the principal to allow him go home
and see hi8 father who was seriously sick. He went
home but his father bad written bim, requesting for
his immediate return from the school.
When he reached home, his parents explained the
whole story to him. which he termed as emphatically
not correct. All of tbem went t o Catbc's parents,
where she was lyiny unconscious and agonised in
groans. She narrated in full, the days and dates both
of them met several times some at Thony's room and
others in her own. "Well readers!, the h u t which was
formally tightened to a bolt was now loosed. Thony
said he was not in a position of marriage. Rut he
still remembered the days their love was like the

�"iced-blocks" which they thought should not be
melted. They left everything, peoding the period she
should bore forth a child. Thony's father stopped
him from further schooling as a result of whai appeared between him and Cathe. As time went on, the
pregnancy sprang up rapidly, and began to trouble
her severaly that she was taken to the hospital. At
the bed-side stood her parents, her mother weeping
mournfully, Thony and his parents, The Doctor
could hardly attend to her then she begao to murmour
these dramatic words;-

AT THE HOSPITAL CATHE SANG A SONG

and Died.
Oh! Thony my dear,
You have killed me,
Remember you should be responsible for any
out-come,
You are my only boy-friend whom I love
very much!
I have no other boy-friend in this town or
else where,
Wby?, because'of my love for you,
Qh! parents, 1 have gone, gone for ever,
Mummy!, Beware of your house holds,
Thony. farewell and good-bye.
We shall see and meet, again where we shall
part no m.ore
Greetings t o brother John, whom 1 love so
dearly.

�At this stage, Thony began to weep, and the
girl suddenly died. Everybody in the hospital was
embarassed at seeing all that happened. In return,
Cathe's parents held Thony's parents r:sponsible for
the death of their child. They exchanged slugeish
words and from there fighting arose between the two
factions.
In a short space of time, Thony's mother collaped
and died, and others inflicted serious injuries among
themselves.
After all these, Thony and his father io company
of some symphatbisers, returned home, carrying the
corpse of his mother Tears gushing out of his eyes.
After the funeral ceremony of his mother, Tnony
declared:-

I connot stay lonely like this,
Now, where is my beloved Cathe?
Where is my Mother?
I shall find a way to meet my Cathe,
Else-where in the would of gloom,
Where there is no deeth
Oh, Heavens, so I have parted with my sweetest Heart.
Catherine, Catherine, Catherine.

HE CRIES, CRIES.

�THONY ONCE MORE IN THE SCHOOL
While passing through these thoughts, his father
called him and seated him on his chair and said:- "My
son, now you have seen the outcome in love dealing
Now "where is your mother? It was for your sake
Cathe died. I am now a widow. Who should be
nursing and giving you motherly advises; (At this
stage both of them began to weep), well 1 have nothing to d o again than to send you back to the school,
if my p x k e t can afford to d o so". "Can you accept
to g e back to school again", his father asked. If I
abandon you now, you wont be able t o make your
own world. Thony replied in the affirmative. He firmly assured his father that he should never in his life
again, fall in love with any girl, however charming
she might be. The father then prepared everything for
him, gave him school fees and pocket money. and
other things necessary for his schooling.
One bright morning he set out for school.
iather bid him farewell and strictlv warned him
if in anyway again, he engaged in love dealings
girls, he should not bear the responsibility for
sort of inpediment o r inconvence.

His
that
with
any

On reaching the school he was warmly admitted
in theclass, None of the staffs of the school o r the

�students were made aware of what happened to Thony
and Cathe. Staying for some weeks he wrote to his
father informing him of his safe arrival to the schod.
His went as follows:Thony Iguabo,
Ubulu Community Sec. School,
1 /?/ti I ,

Dear father,
This is to inform you of my safe arrival to the
school. I was warmly admitted to the class.
Anthong on the other hand was ashamed of going
out beciuse of .the record set by him and Catbe.
Some of the girls in the town murmured words
of abuse on Cathc whenever they saw Anthony. Some
said they advised her not to fall in love with Anthony,
and she said, they were misleading her. T o this, (they
szid) brought bad terms among themselves. Others sdid
Cathe declared that once Anthony no more became
her friend, she should no live lo see him married to
any girl.

To all these, Thony kept silent without a single
word spoken out. He remained in the house till the
end of the term and he went back to school. Now
the hatred he had on girls in particular was beyend
measurement, Dear Readers! he hath now known the

�seed he sowed and the bad tesk brought to him by it.
Now he is in his fourth year aed had all thoughts
lost about Csthe.
He did not write nor receive any letter from his
father for a lone time. Afterwards, his father's note
came thus:-

J B C Iguabo Esq.,
...
Box 5,
Isiokwe

10/7/61

Dear Son,

I hope you are normal. What of your studies?
Since the death of your mother, I had been feeling
loaeliness, and in this case, I want to marry another
wife, of which I have already paid the dowry.
I hope you will appreaciate this substitute? You
know I don't attend to my business now, if not, I
would have sent something to you. Y o w reply is
needed soon.
I am,
yours father.
J. B C. IGUABO.
.
Now when I recount the miseries, hardship and
bad luck that fell on us last time, I became totally
81

�embarrassed, Formerly, 1 thought anything is p i n e d
in the game of love. When you were warning me
uvrr girls, I thought you were misleading me. Now
what have I gained from it?
Evsry night I felt the departure of my mother
from me, and when evtr 1 sltcp, I sea her beside me
sdvising me t o avoid communica~ing
with girls.

I stop so far. till I get yours in return.
Yours son,
T'aonv Iguabo.
Anthony's father got this letter but did not reply
pendine the time he should return box for the first
term's holiday. Despite all the adventures of Thony
and Cathe, he still remembzred and dreamt of her
occassionally. He thought of the sweetness in love
dealing, and the past years when he was once a b ~ y
friend to a charming girl like Cathe. Be thought of the
way Cathe died, he remembered his mother, who
.was the guide key of his education.
A11 these thoughts did not keep his mind at rest,
and he could hardly take any food, and remained adamant and doozy in the class. At the ending e f the
term, he came home and fouod his father
seriously sick. Being fortunate, he recovered rapidly.
Now A n t h ~ n yhad n o chance of treckiog out o r

�relaxing, because he had to d o all the house works,
hence his mother had died. After doing the hoase
work, he had to attend to his studies and later went
to bed. HISfather kept a watchful eye upon him, seeking for th; day he should see any g ~ r lwith him.
In a.short space of time, he got the letter and he
fully Kent through the contents with appreciation.
Later he replied thus:Thony lgus bo,
Ubulu Communitv Scc. School
Dear Father,
Yours of. the loth ultimo was got with delightfullncss. l am normal and my sudies seemed moving
successfully.

I fully support your marrying another wife,
became a person of your calibre won't stay without
a wife.
Nevertheless, I hope she has returned t o your
house, according t o your note. Our vacation is vastly
approaching, and I hope to come and see her.
Yours loving son,
Anthony Iguabo.

IGUABO. THDNY'S FATHER MARRIES
Another Wife.

He got the letter and admired the the wise choice
13
1

�. of his son. Not staying for a good six days from the
receipt of the letter, the girl returned to Iguabo's bouse
s h e -was full of house work ac:ivities, like Aothony's
mother. She was b:autiPul and beard the names, Calo.
Ezimmn Iguabo. Her whole aims were to persuade
and pkase her husband. When he came home on
holidays, he found his father's wife very Symphatetic
and tireless io house works. T o these, he said that he
had got another mother who should advise aud persuade him once more as his mother did.

COMPLETION OF SECONDARY EDUCATION
Now Anthony being fortunate had completed his
edwcational career and passed his Cambridge Examination, with grade I , He began seeking for job in his
town and abroad. His father bein8 popular and
wealtby, tried by all means to secure job for him.

Unfortunately for him, whenever he wrote for
employrneai, the reply of "we regret to state that there
is no vacancy" was got. This again ceused terror t o
him and he always felt miserable.
Anthony stayed for six months before gaining
employment under the Jsiokwe County Gouncit as a
clerk. Now he was full of life and had a termendous
barrier which always kept him pleased. His father
never put forth any ebild and worried him greatly. He
remembered once more his mother and the miserable
life he lived in his game of love with Cathe.

�NOWhe had no love again on girls aad never
talked or played with any of them. Some girls who
again seeked for his love were wondering why be did
not respond to their letters and shouts of admiration
on him. He worked in this office for six months before
m
his thoughts were,apin o girls.
TKONYAT THEAMBASSADOR HOTELBEFRIENDED AGNES

It happened one moonlight night, after the day's
work when he went to have some drinks at the Ambassador Hotel Isiokwe, that he met a charming girl
by name "Agnes" The girl was a student of the Girls
Training college Abutu, and was on holidays. She was
very charming like Cathe, her appearance very romantic and eyes deemed as a person who is caught
by alcoholic drinks. Anthony steered at he and
beckoned her to come. When she came, he made
himself known to her as Anthorir Amechi Iguabo. An
ex-student of the Ubulu Community Secondary school,
and at present werking under the Isiokwe County
Council as a clerk.

She was also very pleased to meet a person like Thony. You know he was a very handsome man from the
beginning, of which school girls rushed on him convincing him for his love with them.

�lo the hotel, be bought different kinds of drinks
and both of them relaxed enjoyously. Thony rememberiog his first adventure, termed it as enthusiastic,
despite the fact that i t later resulted to a dramatic turn. Roth of them did the highlife piece supplied
by the Ambassador Oance Band. They kissed themselves and Thany remembered the time his dearly
beloved Cathe was kissiag him ceaselessly. At this
stage he felt unhappy, but wiped it off, by getting
another charming girl friend.

When tbe dance was over, both of them set for
home. Anthony requested the girl to follow him reach
his room, which she obviously welcomed. Before they
reached home, his father had gone to bed. They
entered his room and she requested for Thony's kisses
and communication. T o these he bluntly refused and
narrated his past adventure with Cathe briefly t o her.
She convinced him that since her life she never had a
boy friend, but she had seen only the boy to befriend
-THONY.

She further said that she hoped nothing very
dramatical, should result between them. Thony was
totaly embarrassed. One miod reminding him of Cathe
and how they parted. The other telling bim to

�continue his game of jove, of wbigb every individual
must play. Patsing these thouehts. he agreed to
her request."Well Readers" you know what happens
wher! a boy and a girl meet. 'They kissed once more and
he escor~edher home. When they were a few yards
from her house, she showed him her house, they bad
a warm kiss and Thony went back.

In the early ho.urs of the morning being unawre
of his girl's coming, he suddenly saw a charming
figure slippinginto his room. Whom d o you think
she was? AGNES! Dear readers, this time she was
crowned queen of the whole kingdom, because of her
applarance, and her face shining like a glittering gold.
Thoay was shocked because of his father, who never
koew this. He advised her not to make any sigos
showing that he was with a girl.
#

Once more they shut the door and eojoyed the
real "Faculties of love dealing" which led to Cathe'e
death. She could hardly help staying longer as they
went on deepcr and deeper. Anthony's father noticing
what was going on, felt annoyed, there was no smile
on his face, his bead thrown forward in deep thoughts
and with one hand suppor~ing his chin. Anthony
escorted her not knrwing that his father had realised
his love again with Agnes. When he was back, he saw
his daddy in a wrong mood. "What is wrong with
you daddy" he asked. He sat motionless without a
single word spoken to him.
37

�AGNES-BACK TO THE SCHOOL.
Now this girl had to go back to the sc6ool without Anthony's consent, because since their last meeting
none of them had visited the other. On reaching the
school she wrote, thus:Agnes Okonkwo.
A, G. T. C.
Abutu.
near sweet-heart,
lnfact I a u l d say you were annoyed for not
informing you before I left for school. In view of the
obvious contradictions of educational concerns, I am
yours for ever.
No man should ever touch or see the soft balls
on my breast, which have been reserved for you-ever.
Your entertaioment to me at the Ambassador Hotel
was beyond my imagina~ion.

I assure you of my keeping to my promise that
I am always yours. Don't be annoyed or feel lenelinebs for I shall come home soon on holidays. Bear in mind, do not shine your love on any other girl.
Yours in return should be delightful welcomed.
I dm,
Yours ever,
Agnes Okonkwo.

�This letter arrived and he admired it. Then followed
the writing and posting of letters to each of them.
Oace again, the girl was in towa on holidays. She
visited Aothony and met his father. He was as steady
as the statue. Anthony noticing that his father was
not after their love, continued the real love with her.
They communicated, kissed and played.
Imagine, Dear readers! Anthony forgot his
first adventure, the outcome in love dealinc, the miserable life he lived for loved sake, If I a m not
mistaken. "Accident does not ring bell when it comes"

As Tennyson said that "wben he laughs at mens
follies, hc prouds them to re-call or rethink, the truth
is by nature ironical. Love is a game that comes from
heaven some said. To Anthony all were just as sweet
as honey. They continued being in love for
quite a considerable time. Anthony could hardly
work in the office. Every minute, his thoughts were
on Agnes. He sometimes saw her in a vision embrassing and kissing with him, while in the office.

AGNES IN A FAMILY WAY
Now Agnes had only a year to stay more in the
school, but her love for Thony even debarred her from
further studies, hoping that he should marry her
unfailingly. "Hellow Readers1 this time another

�tragedy befell Anthony. In a due course the girl
went back to the school. Without wasting time she
wrote to Anthony, a ~ d in return gave a quick
he
reply. rhey continued writing each other, till Agges
ceased replying or writing to him. What was the
cause Readers? She saw herself in a family way. This
state put her a in wonderful thought, dec~ding
what her
parents would d o to her. either t o abandon her o r
might not allow her continue her educat~onafter the
ch~ld's birth.
She was full of earthly misconceptions. She
thought of going to a native doctor. During this time
Anthony never know what was happening. A t last she
decided of consulting a native doctor should be better
and she first wrote to Anthony informing him openly
of the pregnancy. before packing frcm the school for
home.
The day he got the letter was as if a sword was
pierced through his heart. He sat motionlessly in the
office, with one hand supporting the head. H e thought
of his last adventure, Cathe and his mother. He
thought of what. would become his. father's feelings.
Afterwards, he took permission from the Chairman
of the Council and went home.
On reaching home he began to mourn bitterly,
without even making his father aware of what had
happened. In a short space of time,, heqsaw Agnes in

�his room. H tried to deny having knowledge of th:
t
pregnancy, but all were in vain.

DISCUSSIONS. WITHIN AGNES AND TRONY

Aclasc Agnes dec1rared:- My dear,.dcnia\ would
net. help u . Instead we find a substitute for it. What
s.
suggestiou d o you think could release us from this
dramatic moment, hence we are already trapped?
asked Anthony. I suggest it will be better to meet a
native doctor, to find some means of dialuting it.
That's good, but whom d o you think is thc b:st frirnd
native doctor here? Let's go to that b a n living at
the Ugwuogba bush. a few miles from here. Ile is said
to be the best native doctor in this town.

THONY AND AGNES WENT TO A NATIVE

hetors Home.

Both of them set for the man's house. Readers it will
be abortiw.if I leave the doctor's name unmeatiooed,
because his name coincides with the cause ef their
coming to his house. His name was "Umu nwanye
adero mma".. Qn-maahing there they asked him his
name and hexaid "Umu owanye adero mrna" This
struck Agoco deeply and Anthony thought of this
man's name as jeopardeous. They explained what
brought them t o this house and be told Anthony

�that he had such fiasco with Cathe before and as
such his name "Umu nwanye adero mma" had narra ted the end of Agnes.
He asked, does it mean that Agnes should die?
Unfailingly, replied the doctor. They begged him to
try and know whether through bis medical powers
could save her life. He told them that notbing could
save her life. They still begged him. H then charged
e
them the sum of £82 (thirty two pounds) but told them
that he should not bear any responsibility for any
result. They both agreed firmly. Anthony paid the
£32 and he gave her tbe first medicine.

NOTE
Anthony's father was not aware of all these. likewise Agiles's parents. The doctor toldLAnthony to go
back and return in the evening, so that if Agnes
recovered both of them should then go. Aathony
agreed, left Agnes there and went home. On reaching
home he sat on his bed and ponderiog over these
fatal conditions around him, with tears flowing from
his eyes ceaselessly.

THONY BACK TO THE DOCTOR'S HOUSE
It was not quite five o'clock than he set again for
the doctar's house. On the way his thoughts were
only on.Agnes, shivering and pondering what could
be the result wheo he reached there. On reaching
there, he could only see the corpse of Agnes lying in

�bed. He could not talk, neither was he able to stand
up. He stood motionlessly gazing at her. At last h?
told the doctor, "See, you have killed my dear one".
The doctor interrogated, did. I not tell you that I
should not be responsible for any outcome? You
shogld then remit my £32 back to me. S o out now
before I slaughter you to pieces, replied the doctor.
Cooling for some midutes, he ordered the doctor to
give him same medicine wbich could end also his life.
The dactor charged him also, and surrounderd the
medicine to him. He quickly ran out leaving Agnes's
corpse there and reached home with nervousness.

THONY KILLS HIMSELF FOR LOVE'S
SAKE.
On reaching home, he took a piece o f paper and wrote:Father! I die because of my Agnes.
I ha;e considered it fantastic to live without
her:
She died in a native doctor's house, by name
"Umu nwanye adero mma"
Perhaps you might have 'known bim
Daddy good-byc.
I Yavewme to meet my late mother

M) c&amp;!

a&amp; Agnes too.

May my soul rest in peace
May.you hold your peace
We shall see to part no more!

�dear Readers, you have seen the
I girls. Take for example, this
:his boy who would have grown io
oyalty, wealt hyness and intellectual
~ t h .(a) Thony was no more alie
cloved girl-friend. (c) H lost hi
e
es seriously sustained by both fa
i father, Iguabo was among.
Ily, the most of all, he (Tbooy)
nd died. So, my advise to boys of
of ladies" mostly school ones
you cheap.

CHERIO!

CYRIL UMUN.
&amp;llias Institutions
35 Bida Road,

�--

BOOKS PUBLISHED BY

Njoku and Sons
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I

3s
I. My seven daughlen a n after young boys
2 Why b. ys of nowadays don't marry in time
2/6Q
2/6d
3 How to make love with boys
4 h a r e of women
2/6d
5 How to eet a ladv i n love
2/@
6 How Tshombe aqd Mobutu regmttrd after the death
3w
1
of Lumumba
7 How to play love
3/6d
8 Life itory of boys and girls
9 How to write love letters
3/6d
1 How to know Hausa, Ibo, English and Yoruba 3/60
0
I I HOW to write Better letters. applicat ons and
31bus~nesrletters
12 Nigrrian bachelor's guide and lady's guide
2/@
13 How to write good E n g l ~ s h @ , ~ y n p j q ~ a
'9''-.Ire 3/6fJ
2/&amp;
14 A guide to marrisp
d m
IS Salutation is not love
, I 2/6d
16 Why b o p don't trust their girl friends
2/6d
17 No eondition is p ~ m a w t
I 8 The p m e of love and how to play it
2 Md
19 Ncvcr trust ;I1 nowadays
2/6d

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I

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                <text>ca. 1960</text>
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                <text>'&lt;em&gt;They Died in the Game of Love&lt;/em&gt;' exemplifies the quintessential form of Onitsha Market Literature. It includes advice and wise sayings, letter writing, warnings against women, a picture of a European couple, and a romance that ends (obviously) with the death of most of those involved. It all serves to &amp;ldquo;advise boys of our youth&amp;rdquo; and cautions readers to &amp;ldquo;Beware of Ladies mostly school ones otherwise they buy you cheap,&amp;rdquo; (pg.44) &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The advice on good behavior, particularly on how one can identify good boys and girls, is repeated in many other pamphlets. The romance story in &lt;em&gt;They Died in the Game of Love&lt;/em&gt; follows the Onitsha &amp;ldquo;formula&amp;rdquo; quite closely. Thony, a desirable schoolboy, is walking one evening when he receives a letter from a girl he does not know. Thony exchanges letters with the girl, Cathe, and they begin &amp;ldquo;Love dealing.&amp;rdquo; (pg.16). The couple proceeds to exchange gifts, favors and letters without parental knowledge or approval until Cathe is pregnant and gets kicked out of school. She dies from complications, and the two sets of parents get into an argument. Thony&amp;rsquo;s mother dies of injuries (either emotional or physical) received during the argument. Despite this, Thony soon develops a relationship with another girl. This young woman dies from complications of an abortion performed by the infamous &amp;ldquo;native doctors.&amp;rdquo; Thony then commits suicide.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The pamphlet ends with a warning from the author of the dangers that stem from playing the game of love. Umunnah writes, &amp;ldquo;Well dear Readers, you have seen the bad effects got from girls...imagine this boy who would have grown into a position of loyalty, wealthiness and intellectual happiness of his youth. (a) Thony was no more alive. (b) He lost his beloved girlfriend. (c) He lost his mother,&amp;rdquo; (pg.44). &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The author suggests that this could happen to all young men who seek corner-corner love, (pg.5).</text>
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                    <text>HOW TO
PLAY LOVE

'.*:-

Miss Helen Nwamma
A Wonderful Lady.

��AY 'LOVE
STEPHEN'S DRAMA SERIES
COMPILED BY

FELIX hr.
STEPHEN
(NOVELIST AND DRAMATIST)

Copyright strictly Reserved.

2$ N.

O . N j o k u.

Send your Orders to:-

Njoku cE. Setas B ~ ~ b h o p
C/o No. 17 Nnewi Street,
ONITSHA - NIGERIA.

�%% %%X%X%
Printed by
Chinjelu Printing Press,
No. 1 Iweka Road,
Onitrha - Nigeria.

%

:
g
%
'*c'

�PREFACE
This is a book which deals mainly on the requirements of love and particularly, the type existing
between men and women. It is indeed a very interesting piece of drama, desgnied to suit both the
young and the aged.

Like my other drama books, I am confident,
that readers will be interested, since [he price a t
which it is sold, is cheaper. than what the
book really contains.

The play is entirely imaginary and thus, all
the characters are purely fictitious and relate to 03
1
existing persons.

FELIX N. STEPHEN.

he ~ u t h o r .

�HOW

TO

PLAY

LOVE

CONTENTS
Act Reply from comfort to uba

Uba writes to another girl
Act one ( Scene 2 ) housand and wife
Act ' ' ( Scene 3 ) Abel and his lover
( Enter Onyeuku )

Act one ( Scene 4 )
( Enter Nneka, Onyeuku's wife

Act one ( Scene 5 )
Act two ( Scene One
Act two (Scene

2

Act three ' ' ' '

One

Act

‘“‘

"'c

two

' ' three 'Scene
four C ' L S

3

Act four Scene

4

' 6 6

1

Page.

�HOW

TO

PLAY

LOVE

UBA J ( 3 ) SEARCH O F L O V E
N
UBA: I must learn how to chast. I like beautiful
ladies. 1 must play love and will, not care
what people may say. I saw a beautiful girl
yesterday, who is a lady teacher. I must 'not
waste time in writing to her, now I "begin"
Government School,
Jos Nigeria,
4 1 -62.
Dear Heavenly Comfort,
Indeed it is with deep pleasure that I write you
this letter which 1 think will come to you as a surprise. *Butyou must excuse my forwardness.

-

-

Definitely, you d o not know me and I seem to
grasp, how you will feel to read a letter of a person
whom you have not known before. Infact, "Love"
has forced me to give you my warm admiration.

1 am a student a t above address, studying f o r
my Cambridge. My name is Uba and I am popularly known as "Social boy" Infact, my position
will suit you.

i met you yesterday during my school hour.
but could not say anything as I was tongue tied,
hence this cote. I shall not waste my time to
'request you this. Please will you be my lover? Hence
you have known that "Love is a powerful magnet
that drows two souls tc?gether2'. N o need of rejecting me.
Infact, I would dedicate my whole life to you
.should " Yes " be returned and 1 assure you that
I shall be yours for ever and ever.

�HOW

TO

PLAY

LOVE

Kisses frow,
b b a the social boy.

A REPLY FROM COMFORT TO UBA.
Comfort Nwaeke,
C. M. S. School,
Awara Town,
15- 2 - 62.
Dear Uba,
Infact, your missive surprised me indeed.
Please, do not address me again either in public or
by any other means. You are mistaken if you
consider me t o tolerate such nonsense, I would
have handed that letter to my parents but due to
what it will bring upcn your career I stopped. But
if you address me in any way again, I shall not
hesitate to lay the whole matter to my parents.

1 am,
C. Nwaeke tough girl.

UBA WRITES T O ANOTHER GIRL.
Uba the social Boy,
Government School,
Jos- Nigeria,
26 2 62.

- -

Dear Pauly,
1 do not know how to begin this letter as I
have only met you last night. The thought of
f r i e n d s h i p makes me feel quite uneasy, infact,
wants to crazy me.

�HOW

TO

.PLAY

LOVE

Oh! Pauly! iVil1 you drow me nearner and let
me touch your smooth body and glance s t your
hairy hands?
In fact, a lock at your brown eyes and your
pointed nose will remove all thc devils of my
foolishness and make me to be the happiest man ever
lived. Do not allow me to run mad because of you.
Pleare, what I want from you is your sincere
!ove, kindly love me as I love you. Hence, you have
known that "Love is a WARM AFFECTION".
Kindly take the enclosed photograph and glance at
me and see whether I am not handsome.

I am wa,iting to hear "YES" from you, my dear
Yours Beloved.
Uba the social boy.
This time Paulinah did not respond. Uba waited
and waited and could not get any reply.
Uba: I will tiever write to any girl for friendship
again hence, this Paulinah did not reply. It will
be better for me to speak to any girl orally o r
personally rather than wasting my time in writing. I d o not know what prouds these our
modern ladies, is it because they are beautiful
or have I a bad luck for getting them. Infact.
1 d o not know what to do just to get a lover.
Shall I consult a native dsctor about it? O! No,
I shall never d o it, for my mates did not consult a doctor before they got theirs. Yes. I must.
speak to this girl coming in front of me now.
I have met her some where before. Her name
is Helen. I hope to win her lev-., wrely I must.

�HOW

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LOVE

Excuse me Helen.
Helen: Yes my Lord, what can I d o for you ?
Aba: Listen to you Helen, I must be sincere. Your
beauty is one of the charming that I had tver
come across. lt docs not in any way occur
to me that I should get alone in life, without
looking once or two times at your face,
everyday. In age, we seem to be mates and in
other spheres, I d o not think myself very much
below the average, when speaking particularly,
in the terms of achievement in the circle of
mates, Love is something which is inevitable.
It is indeed like death. Some people take it
as a type of game. But I regard.it as someihing
very helpful i n the day to day life of minkind.
I t solves certain problems which money may
not even be able to solve at times. True love
will always speak for itself since it has such
a very wonderful magnetic influence that can
even draw a lion, as ferocious as it is, out of
its own den. For me to talk very much a t
length just now, might give you wrong opinion
of my person from the oneset. Thus, 1 have
perfectly determined. to control myself while
speaking..In short, 1 would like to have your
love.
Helen: Can that be the. reason for this long
sermon of yours?
Uba: y e s my dear, for I quite realise that it
takes women some time ro be convinced to
agree to a request.
It might even be to their own desire. But,
they will still dailly-dally over it.

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LOVE

Helen: Yes, it is because, in those days we had not
known and so. took men serious in all that they
spoke t o us. But now, just as the day breaks
and another date comes, we are gradually
coming to the realisation of the facts and
figures. The days of flattery, seem to be going
away. especially in my own case and as far
as my affairs with men are concerned. You
said that I am'biautiful. Naturally, ahy woman
with such makeups as I have now, will surely look
attractive. I mbst besincere to you, for I d o not
like to say many things and mean only a few of
them. It is not an easy thing, to secure my love.
There are certain terms that I go by. If you
are really serious, then, I can tell them t o you.
Well, if after hearing and you wish to get along
with me, then you may have to d o so. But where
otherwise, J shall be fully prepared to take my
own way, without any atom of regret.
Uba: I have actuaily heard you say that you are
tough and I presume i t is so. In any case, one
thing that surprises me the more, is that many
tough people d o not easily reveal themselves as
such. Whatever be the case, I would not mind
informing you tbat 1 am. equallj tough. I have
my own principles, set down ones too. From
them, I do not hope to go back please say on,
for I shall be very much prepared to hear. As
strong as the laws of nature are, yet, they are
kept. I am sure too, to meet up, with your own
requirements.
Helen Indeed, you are right. The first is that, you
should have. no other friend, male o r female.

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LOVE

Uba: If it is only a question of not getting another
female friend, I shall be able to d o so. But, that
of dissociating myself from my fellow men, is
something that might need a second thought.
Helen: I t then, means, that you are not prepared,
for the business. Is that correct?
Uba: It is not so! I am fully prepared.
Helen: Why then not agree to my first proposition?
Uba: Male friends are very useful. Something about
love-making, cannot be solely relied upon since
it is plausible. Well, 1 shall be prepared to d o
so since it 1s your wish and 1 have a strocg desire to make love with you.
Helen: That is very good of you. 1 d o not like any
person making love with me, to have ma!e
friends. For, they might deceive him and thus,
our love gets shattered. But remember very well,
that you are uot the first person to contact me,
over this. However, since you have been able to
go through the first step there is every likelihood
of your succeeding in the affair. It is this. that
has knocked out many people who came up to
ask for my love.

I
Uba: If it be thy will that 1 shall succeed, then, '
shall have t o be one of the happiest men.
Helen: Thesecond, is that I will not like to have
anything from you, in the form of presents
either in cast or in kind,
Uba: Well done my beautiful lady. This is where
you differ very much from other women.

�HOW

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Helen: N o t only that, I shall be prepared, to
defray some part of your expenses.
Uba: Thank you very moch. It appears as if God
pushed me on, to you.
Helen: Just hold on a bit! I shall buy all clothes
that you may need
Uba: May ,God bless you more and more. I had
not even thought that I would in life, meet with
such a fortune. That next prevents me from
dismissing my male friends and then, havicg
you right away? Afterwards they are not doing
anything for me. They are only o.ut to exhaust
my pocket.
Helen: My father left an estate for me, when he
died and it is from there, that I will be giving
you some money for busicess. At least, fifty
pounds per month.
Ubs: O! Goodbye to poverty! Welcome to a
tremendous fortune I
Who else will have to compare himself in wealth, to me? I shall at once purchase a car and
both of us will be driving through the streets
of this town. Truly, I shall be known as a big
man. Infxt, I do not know what ro say that I
shall do for you, when that is executed. N o
more! No more! Let our love making begin
at once. .What next delays us ?
Helen: I shall everi surrender my father's upstair
building and both of us live there i n full comfort
and entirely free o f charge.
bba: If all sounds like a dream. Wheo I begin
to consider what it will all have to look like.
I become very much filled up with joy,
May heaven bless you again!
Are your parents now old?
- -

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LOVE

Uba: My mother is fourty this year while my father
is sixty ,five.
Helen: Have you got some brothers and sisters?
Uba: Yes my dear. Two sisters and one brother.
At any rate. all of them are still schooling.
Helen: Well, the third step is this;
Uba: Lest I forget. My wife is also with me, but
she has not yet given birth to any child.
Helen: That is very good. The next and final step,
is that since I drink nothing else than blood,
you should be going out dally to bring people
for me. Your father whom J am to take as a
slave, will be busily engaged, cutting off their
heads and filling cups with blood, For me to
drink. In addition, he will be carrying me
on .his back, from the parlout, to the bath
room and when to finish taking my bath, he
brings me back. Your mother's head will be
cut off by your father. Your wife's head will
also be treated like that. Both of these, will be
kept in the bathroom. While taking my bath
I shall stand my right foot on the skull of your
mother and the left, on the skull of your wife.
I n order to get an efficient service from your
father, he will be casterated. You must disown
your brother and slsters.
Uba.: This is yet one of the most wonderful state
of life, 1 have ever come across As a matter
of fact, I need a lover and I am desirous of
having one earliest. I had fixed it within my
mind, that I would have no any other lady
but you. All the same, I cannot tell you lies.
I love my n1o:her very much.

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LOVE

Blood is very thick. I am sufe ~ h a tif you
pinch yourself, you might go to experience the
pain and then agree that it would not be all
that proper, to pinch another person. For me
therefore to kill her and give you her head as a
type of stool while taking jour bath, is a thing
which I d o not deem very possible. My
father is quite precious to me.
Helen: Please remember that we shall only be for
and nothing like marriage, will
love mskir~g
have lo come in.
Uba: There you are my only beloved lady. It then
means that 1 might not have more shares. My
profit might only have to be some type of sweat.
It is true that there may be children or not, But
none of them will have to take me as 3 legitimate father. On the whole, I shall have t o be
at a loss. My brother is somebody who is very
dear t o me and it is sure that he will have to relieve me when my days or this earth, might have
finished. Coming to n y sisters whom you say
that I should disown, I wish to let you know that
this cannot be all that possible. Truly. money
is a very essential thing, but it cannot force me
t o do away with what might be against the
actual commandments of God. I shall be
laughed a t by men. God will not like it. Again,
I cannot because of the purposes of making
love, go to be a murderer or encourage anything relating directly or indirectly, t o the kill.
of people. My approach of you, might have
been somehow misdirected. Please. pardon me
l own my error. If you might have somehow
been used to this type of evil, I positively

.

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LOVE

maintain before you, that I am just a novice. Please. I can now say goodbye to the request that I
had earlier made. I shall alwaysicontinue to be liking you. Distance might have to be no barrier to
our relationship which is just, but, growing. Other
people who are ioterested may g o t o usbject themselves to your conditions, but. 1 shall not.
ACT ONE (SENE 2 )
HUSBAND A N D WIFE
Agnes: My dear husband, how do you find it
useful, to remain without doing anything
quite visible, as to make a better living?
Abel: You might not consider yourself correct, to
ask me this type of question. You may appreciate that since you came to my house, you
had never remained hungry. Everyday, I run
about to see how I can manage up to get
some money for our food. Left with me alone,
I could have been eating in the hotel?, even on I
credit. I had many customers with whom I
had such an arragement as thal, before your
arrival to this house, to bs my wife. It is
only about two months ago that you came
here. I really consider it too early for you to
have already begun to find faults with me.
Agnes: Yes my dear, I quite realize that it is really
too early for me to -have begun to find faults
with you. But I am only talking the truth and
what I consider, will help both of us. When you
came to marry me, you told my parents, that
you were a civil servant on leave. Now, I have
come to find out that there is no truth in the
statement. Consider now, how woefully disappointed, my parents shall be, if they come to find
your statement to them otherwise. But what
shall we eat today?
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LOVE

Abel: D o not worry. Even though I have not got
a penny in my pocket, yet, I shall not be worried 1 know very well, haw the thing usually
comes. God in heaven. will bring something for
US to eat.
Agnes: Never in my life, had 1 heard of, or seen,
any person who sat down and kept on looking
for food to come down, from the sky. Even if
it might have per chance, been the luck of one
man perhaps according to the scriptures, yet I
do not bdieve that it is what will apply to each
hacd every person.
Abel: Infact. I cannot easily tell. what might have
becn the sole cause of )!our speech this day. T o
me, it appears that love does not mind certain
things that could be regarded as serious mistakes
If I am even a thief you can hide the fxt away
from other people, since any type of shame on
me, will also reflect on you. Let us keep on
loving ourselves more and more. Trouble shouId pive chance to peace and comfort, so that
this our lives can easily be turned into a bright
outlook of hope. When I was an irresponsible
man, I played life verj well and now that I am
responsible, I hope to do everything, carefully.
Agnes: How do you think that you are now responsible?
Abel: You may not like the result, if you venture
to insult me.
Agnes: It simply makes me laugh indeed. i have
never been trained 10 tell lies and I find it late
to begin d training of that type, now. Many of
those people whom you call your friends have
approached me and busily engaged themselves
in trying to force me out of your hands. They
say that you are of a questionable character.

�HOW

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LOVE

Some of them maintain that you are an ordinary
rambler. Others say that you are an ordinary
deceiver. I must be frank to you. One lady came
t o me and told me with every sincerity, that
I shall not know the day, that you will like to
run away from this house and live in another
town. Then she continued, that I shall have to
been responsible for the payment of the house
rental, If such a thing happens, it simply means
that since I am a helpless woman, there will
every possibility of my going home to my
parents to look for some financial aid from
them. How can such a lover, with these q ~ a l i ties be relied upon. It is understood that 1 am
not the first woman that you had cunningly
brought in. I have also heard that you simply
want t o spoil me and to leave me entirely useless
in life. 0 dear! when love bears another
meaning, from what it normally ought to, then,
the sole motive for which that sacred thing
was made. is defeated. 1 cannot tell you lies,
1 love you, but, I do not love your ways. Ydu
are quite handsome and very presentable. But
it should be known very well, that when character is lost, everything seems to have lostalmg
with it. This is why I will not like to be in alliance, with any person whose character, seems
t o be all that strange. 1 had heard right from
childhood, that any woman who gets married to
a thief, is alsoa thief But you can only know
what that idiom, stands for. I may not have to
talk very much again. All that 1 want, is not
silver or gold but good character from you.
Where you fail me in that, you may not have
t o blame me when I bid good- bye to our love
and farewel! to a heart which 1would then refer
to, as once beloved.
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LOVE

Abel: Look care! I am getting fed up with this type
of address. I am sure that you will stop to remind me of the past. When first we met, you
agreed very strongly to get married to me. Today, I am simply confused over your present
thoughts. Since you have already termed me
wicked. I might be forced to deal with you in
life manner, so as to agree very well with your
opinion about me. If you could have been a bit
tactful, I could have hidden away some of my
wicked acts and then charged to good. But now,
I must have to expose myself to you, in the true
form You may be disappointed and thus, begin
to great, why you ever attempred to love a man
of my own type. It will be such a lesson to jou,
that throughout your life time, you will continue
to remember it. In the first place, you should
realist: tbe fact that I did not force you to love
me. Your parents were very happy, to consume
my money. They did not say that it came from
a wicked man. After keeping me poor, &gt; o a ,low
come to discredit me. D o not forget lbat your
parents demanded and received one hundred
and fifty pounds from me as a bride price on
you. Look at it a youngman of my own type
without parents. From where else, do you .exp.
ect the money for feeding to come? G o then. to
your parents. get some money from them and I
am eomfident, that it will lead us in maintenance,
for some time. Hal ha! ha! I will teach you a
lesson and tell you in a language which you'can
understand, that you have joked with the wrong
man. Meanwhile, let me only go out and be
back. I will show you how to treat an insultive
fellow.

�HOW

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LOVE

( H e goes out )
Agnes: 0 Love! A big deceiver of people! Thou
hast got me tied up to a man who appears good,
but internally rotten. A very wicked fellow! An
imp of misfortune and an ungrateful scamp. He
is such a type that will like to cail good, bad.
Look at him, telling me how .possible it would
be, for food to come to a person who does not
like to struggle for it. A thing never done in human history. I wonder how some people reason.
H e was talking of s3me hi3 sufferings while attempting'to marry me. Is he the first man to marry a lady? O!No wonder he might have no
doubt forgotten thrt he who wishes to have a
wife, must first of all, be prepared for it Indeed,
it is not joke. What wo'rries my mi~:d much; is
the insult that this wretch.has given to my parents. He says that he will tesch me a lesson.
Ofcourse, that is the normal way of a crook: J
wonder what he means by that. It appears that
this man does not seem to realize that he.is a
fool. I am determined to !eave him. I have
actually made a big mistake by coming to him.
He is perhaps makmg some p!ans to undo me,
but I shall be ready with mhe,
Helen: It is for this reason that 1 have actua!ly
decided to try men. Now, I can easily find out
that you do not appear to'have meantwhat you
said. I do not wish to abandon the taking of
blood, simply ,because I have come to you.
&amp;in, I do not wish any man with whom.1 am
t o be frieodly. to have any other man who is his
own friend or brother. The sisters are also to
go away. When the man is only ready to satisfj,
'his own wish and forget everything

18

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LOVE

about my commandments, T shall not be prepared to have him. Goodbye then my youngman.
Farewell to our proposed love.
ACT ONE ( SCENE 3 )
ABEL AND HIS LOVER
Abel: Get out of this house!
Margaret:' Was this how we began the love?
It might be anyhow. I will only like you
Abel:
to go away and tbat is all. Please my dear lady,
d o not sta) here, until I come back.
Margaret: I actbally have determined to be your
wife. Truly, I do not wish to abadon you. There
will be no harm, if you only go to cool down
yourself for a while.
Abel: I would only have to go and pray for death.
People must actually d~scredited me for quite
a long time. This will surely be the end of my
sorrows and like my fore-theres who had bravely
resisted any attempts to keep them ashmed, I
shall march on and afterwards, history, and nothing but history, shall have to speak of me. It
is then that people will have to say that I was
once a man who would not like to tolerate the
fooleries of a woman. There are some men who
may like to tolerate such nonsense as this. But
for my part, I consider it nothing short of the
abuse of destiny. God himself who created me
and brought me into this life, will also hear
witness of my actions. Yes, I was forced to marry, when 1 found out tbat many of my own
mates have Cone so. But instead of enjoying
it 1 found it rather boring. He who can get
along w ~ t h
bags of insults can do so. I shall not.
My heart is seriously aching over this; Life
could mean anything to others.
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LOVE

But for me, it has come to show another thing
quite contrary to expectation. I am not a rich
man. People like Onyeuku are enjoying
themselves and perhaps, if death comes, they
might bother. But I am not like that. Everyday,
I srt down and look at people enjoying. But
I d o not take part.

(ENTER O N Y E U ~ U )
Margaret: ( Weeping ) Welcome Sir.
Onyeuku: Yes my dear. It appears that you have
something worrying your mind.
Margaret: I t is nothing else tban love. I only
misfired. The man I chose a s my' own lover
and husband now wants t o abadon me and
1 d o not know what next to do.
Onyeuku: Have you apoloeised to him?
Margaret: I have actually done that but it appears
that he does want to listen. What next to do,
is just beyond my own imagination.
Onyeuku: Yes, this why 1 always liketo have money.
When a poor man makes love, he does not
enjoy it. If you were to be in my house, you
could not have felt any type of sorrow.
( Enter Uba )
Margaret: I am prepared to gd away, since all
attrmpts t o reconcile have failed.
You are only shedding crocodile tears
Abel :
and that, cannot help you. I am indetd, very
sorry for you.
Uba: Is it all the same story this way too? A lady
coming t o tell me that she would like t o use
my mother's head as a stool while taking her
bath, is just what I cannot understand.
Onyeuku: When did it happen ?

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LOVE

Uba: It is a very recent talk.
Abel: Or else?
b b a : , Then there will be no love.
Abel: I do not quite understand, what is worrying
these ladies.
Well, I have taken my own decision.
( Enter Agnes )
Uba: Oho! Here we are again. You blood drinker.
Abel: She must have been the fellow. no doubt?
Uba: Surely, she is.
Abel: Today is my final day in everything relating
to the insults of women and everything about
their love. (Onyeuku goes away)
Uba: I shall be very pleased to have it so, too.
T a k e it (He
Abel: (Locking the door )
shoots the three and himself too).
ACT ONE (SCENE 4)
Onyeuku: I am a very happy man in life. At the
moment, nothing worries me. As for the money,
1 can say with every assurance, that 1 shall he
allowed to take my seat amidst the wealthy
people. 1eat.anything that I like and my drinks
are costly ones. he money is there and so, I will
not like to associate with anything that is
inferior.
(Enter Ikem, a friend)
How are you poor man?
Ikem: Yes my friend Onyeuku, 1 admit that I am
poor. But as long as I eat well in my house
and maintain my family, I assure you that I am
equally rich. The fact that 1 have not got a
car or erected a skyscraper, does not very
much matter.
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LOVE

Onyeuku. You ought to buy a car so that i t can
easily be confirmed, that you have the mokley.
For my part, I put on costly dresses and in
that way, draw the attention of the enlire public.
No wonder, when 1 go on foot, eipecially. when
I feel like takmg breeze in the evenings people
state at me, as if they have seen a god, 0 my
dear! it is pleasant to be a big man. Nothing
worries the person and no person has authority
over him.
Ikem: That might be correct. I, however feel that
everybody. whether rich or poor, exists until
death the leveller, comes to give its verdict..
Onyeuku: Death or no death, I am no: in the
least, perturbed. It is only a poor man who
is afraid of death, because he has no money
t o cure himself, when sick. In my own case,
my money can take me to even the most costly
hosp~tal. I can even engage about two or three
medical doctors to take charge of my health.
Thus. sickness will run away acd so. death too,
will be afraid to come near.
Ikem: Infact my friend Onyeuku, I am not a
small boy, as you very well know. I had seen
some wealthy men let low into the usual six
feet of earth, which 1 stronly maintain, can be
said to have been the equaliser of all. I hope
that you will not dispute this. For, it is an
established fact. Really, whenever it is time,
there might be no need resisting, since it will
be entirely meaningless, so to do. Surely a man
of your own experience and age, ought not
doubt the truth in what 1 have told you.

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LOVE

(Enter Nneka, Onyeuku's wife)
Onyeuku. My name suits my position very wek
O! How I like it! If 1 were called a bigman and
in wealth, I had no stand, I could have liked
to commit suicide than to remain and be mocked about by each and every fellojr. D o you
fail to realize the fact, that a man who has no
money is always a friend of everybody, including even a small boy? Ask my wife, I also
purchase costly cloths for inorder that my
prestige will stand upright. She has more gold
than most of her mates and coupled with a
superb maintainance, she thus becomes one
of the happiest women that ever lived. My
dear wife, is it not so?
Nneka. You do not seem to be very much mistaken. But, 1 do not quite think, that eatii~g
well and dressing very flamboyantly can ktep
a person happy all the days of his or her own
life.
Ikem. My most respected lady, you have actually
made a very wise statement.
( Enter Benson, a potter )
Onyeuku. Yes Mr. man, what is your name and
how did you maoage to come ht r&amp;?
Benson: Master, I have come to you, for some
help My wife has just put to bed in maternity
and I need money badly. If and only but if,
you can manage 10 assit me out of this difficult situation, 1 shall be most grateful.
Onyeuku: Ha! Ha! Ha! Perhaps these people
think that it was how we got rich. I do not
borrow money and will not like to lend
:o any person any brass farthing.

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LOVE

At the moment, I am determined to sue one
man who has lived i n one of my plots for six
months now, but does not care to pay the rental.
Benson: The position might be so sir, Rut, out of
human kindness, try, try sir, to help me,
Onyeuku: 1 will not help you. The earlier you go
away from here, the better. But, how much do
you really want from me?
Benson: Any amount. not less than two pounds,
will be greatly appreciated and I hope to return
that, within a fortnight.
Onyeuku: Two pounds? Big money indeed! Anyway
I[ have not less than ten thousand pounds as
fixed deposit in the bank. In my house here
there is an amount not below the sum of two
hundred pounds in cash. But, sorry! sorry! I
will not give out any money to you.
Benson: On my knees, I beg sir! ( Shedding tears )
Help me Sir!
Onyeuku: I did not weep before 1 became a rich
man. Amuse me more and more. Ha! Ha! Ha!
Look at his lips and wrinkled face. Money is
hard to get.
Benson: If you hzlp me, God will reward you sir.
Onyeuku: I am not ready ti, help you at all.
Benson: Ehl My poor wife and her child. May you
not because of them help me a bit?
Onyeuku: They may even die and that will be better!
Benoon: If that happens, it simply means that more
will be added to my sorrows. There might be
no money to purchase coffins for them.
Onyeuku: Yes, that is exactly what 1 want. You
will then be laughed at, much to my own pleasure. Did I prevent you form being rich?
24

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Infact, where were you, when I gathered my
wealth? Alright, let me come down a bit.
Dance for me.
Benson: ( Dancing ) I hope it will please you Sir
and then you may help me, so that I can go
back to the maternity and see the woman and
her child. For, by now, the woman might have
been feeling hungry.
Onyeuku: 0 no! There is money right enough as
I said before, but I shall not give you. However,
let me just see what I can d o now.
Benson: Yes Sir! I beg, try Sir. Try and help me.
Onyeuku: bring your head.
Renson: (Bows ) At your service, my dear Sir.
( Onyeuku cracks him ).
Thank you Sir!
Onyeuku: Alright! You may now have t o go away.
Renson: What about the help, Sir ?
Onyeuku: I am sorry my dear youngman. Yon
might very well appreciate that I am not a
money-lender. Really. I suffered before getting
whatever you now see me use. I will alse like
everyother person to sweat very well for cash.
G o away! Get away at once!
Benson: After all these sufferings received, should
I still go away without your help?
Onyeuku There is no help at all! ~o!co!away I say!
Benson: Thank you very much. God is alive and
will be the judge.
Onyeuku: Come if what may! My money is there!
Benson: Let it be ( He leaves )
Onyeuku: Ssrvanr! ( Servant enters ) Give me one
bottle brandy. ( The drink is served and he
begins ro take. )
25

�HOW

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LOVE

Nneka: You might not have bten quite rig'it . in
treating the poor man in that way.
Onyeuku: That is not my concern. I must be
hard hearted, since 1am not owing any
person.

-

Ikern:

I have no other statement to make. But
if 1were you, I should not have like that.

Onyeuku: I have obeyed my own conscience and
that is all about it.
(Exeunt)

(ACT ONE SCENE 5)
Benson: This is yet, one ofthe most inhuman type
of treatrnent,erer given to mankind. That I can go to
a wealthy man for some aid and after being subj,cted
to series of humiliations, would s:ill come home, just
as I had left. 0 God! Why keep n e alive it1 the
world to be toyed about, by each and every person
who might have been fortunate to get some cash?
My wife is still waiting for me. Truly, everybody
realises what it is, for a moth:r to be with her child
in a maternity. O! no food m i no money to buy
some! What next, should I do? MY hopes, now seem,
to have been entirely foiled and &gt;haltered to pieces!
No help from any source no help at all! But, God
is there. (He prays) "0 most gracious Father,
who always listens to the cry of His children,
kindly come near and help me now. I confide in
no other person or thing l know and have also
heard of;how far you had !;tlped other people o!
I
let me be favoured 1ikewi.t-. T h ~ s confidently ask,
Amen" Any other thing can happen.

-

�HOW

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LOVE

Onyeuku or no Onyeuku, since1 have prayed
to God, I am happy, For, He never fails.
(Enter Joseph, a friend)
Can this be you Joseph?
Joseph: For many months I had been away to the
spanish territory. lnfact I made a lot of profit over
there. From the ninet) cases tobacco I broght
home, I was able to make a gain of one hundred and ten pounds. This amount of course,
exculdes the profit made on the brandy. On the
whole, it was a very pleasant trip. I had no difficulty with either the police or the customs watereuard officers. Now my friend, where is your
wife Erinma ?
Benson: She is now in the maternity.
What for ?
Joseph: She has recently, given birth to a bouncing
baby boy.
Benson: Congratulations, my friend Benson: O!The
wonders of God, are great! If it were someing to be bought with money, you coulf not
have been able to compete with these wealthy
and greedy men around us. At any rate, since
I shall not be privileged to see her today,
(dipping hands into his pocket and bringing
our some notes) Take this little amount of five
pounds and manage up, until I am chanced to
to come back to you.
Benson: Thank you very much Joseph. Please, do
not fail to turn up on Saturday. For, it is on
tbat day, tbat I shall invite friends and wellwishers to my house and all of us will have to rejoice together, over the merciful work of cod to me.
Joseph: I hope to be in your house, by then. I still
have some revolver and pistol guns, to deliver
to customers.
27

�HOW

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So,good-bye till then and pass my greetings, t o
the worthy woman.
finson: I have heard you and I am very grateful,
indeed. (Joseph leaves. It is indeed very gratifying, that the fervent prayers of a man of my own
type, can thus be easily answered. (He sighs) 0
money ! It was because of you, that I went and
vaily suffered every amount of disgrace, toda! . O!
when w~ll troubles of this life, cease ? At any
the
rate, 1 must take h e m . Onyeuku, will not lige
forever.
(Enter Erinma)
0 b dear. Are you back? l was only preparing
t o come for you.
Erinma: T o my surprise, a Taxi driver came u p and
informed me that your friend Joseph, had paid
him, to convey me home ro my husband. I had
t o respond at once and together with my child,
B:ns oncame home. Thanks be to God, that you
are back to this house.
( Exeunt )

ACT TWO ( SCENE ONE )
Onyeuku: (sitting in his parlour, smoking a pipe
and with a cup of wine in hand ). I wonder
when these poor men, will cease from worrying
me. Ha! ha! ha! I created one of them, in the
most contemptuous manner, last time. He was
talking of his wife. Does he not know that I
also have a wife ? Nonsense!
Enter Ude, Debtor )
Yes, thanks be to whatever demon that might
have brought you here today. where is my money? 1 mean the rental, that you owe me? I am
Porry Sir. Infact, I d o not have the money here
and I beg you io allow me some days, to look
for it.

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�HOW

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Onyeuku: Shut up your mouth! I actually have the
right t o slap you just now and cover up every
thing,with my money. D o you agree that you are
my slave right now?
Ude: Yes, my Lord.
Onyeuku: What I what, is my mofiey.
Ude: I have not got it sir. Please consider my plea.
Onyeuku: 1 don't Lazy man1 I cannot consider you.
What I know, is that you must Pay me today
and just now. If nor, you will not step out of
thisroom. I will not mind, beating you !o death.
Ude: 1 beg you Sir.
Onyeuku: Perhaps you not understand what I am
saying. Where is my money?
Ude: It is not here Sir:
Onyeuku Did it run away?
Ude: N o Sir. The fa'ct is that I cannot produce i t
today Sir.
Onyeuku: A Lazy fellow. I wonder why there
should be very many lazy people, these days. I
will teach you a lesson today. I can even kill
and skin you. Afterwards' 1 bury your corpse
or leave it for the vulture and use your skin
in making a drum, which I will use in entertaining myself, when I want t o add more t o my
own comfort. Poor fellow, I am indeed sorry
for you., Be sure, that your family will no longer
enjoy your company He handles a big stick and
Ude escapes). I am sorry that thsi idiot of a
man, has escaped. However,it is not difficult to
get him round. I wish to d o as already planned.
meanwhile, let me sit down and think properly
over how to catch and kill him. If possib!e, I
can even drink his blood. I want to be as hostile
as possible, to any poor man, who comes across
iny way. (He sits.down puffins his pipe.
29

�HOW

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LOVE

The wine is still on the table, when death d:essed up in a black suit, entered and stood
opposite him).
Who are you my man?
Death: I am death. I: do not joke, as you might have
heard.
Onyeuku: It a p p e a r s then, that you might have
made a mistake to enter my house. 1 do not
want you now. But can i help you and is their
anything wrong?
Death: (Looking very grave) I did not make any
mistake: Is vour name not Onyeuku ?
Onyeuku: Sure 1 Onyeuku is my name.
Death: What else? I have proposely come to take
you. Therefore, prepare at onc and follow me.
Onyeuku: ( Sweating 2nd throwing away his pipe)
Might there be not mercy?
(Looking quite subtle).
Drath: (appearing more serious with eyes open). If
need be.
Onyeuku: Please, what should I do, to cease the
situation ?
Death: (In a deep tone). Time is flying. 1 have been
trained, not to joke with my time.
Onyeuku: Although no human being trifles with
you and you are not prepared to waste any time,
yet, it would be something of unparallelled
kindness, ifyou can only, out of goodwill, allow
me give some directives, to the members of my
family. Truly, everybody fears you and I am no
exception. lnfact, I respect you. The truth is
that, you do not appear as wicked, as people
think you are.
Death: (Smilling a bit with one of his eyes, slighly
open). Infact, if it were not that, I am duty
bound, to safeguard my own business, I could
have left you, scotch free.
30

�HOW

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But. I cannot help it. As a matter of fact, you
are among the few wise people, who admit that 1
am in some cases, kind.
Onyeuku: (With some smiles). I have found out
that1 cannot escape this. But, still, [
plead that you give me scme days, so that
I can hold some discussions with the
members of my family.
Death: But earlier, I underst'ood that you would
resist me. For that, 1 came with full force,
to meet you face to face, so as to know
who is more powerful than the other.
Onyeuku: (Smiling.) Even in dreamland, I cannot
tell you or any other person, that I am
your equal. I am a weak cre.iture. Infact,
such that cannot stand you in any angle.
Death: Well, I am happy to hear this.
Onyeuku: Furthermore, you know that man, has
enemirs. One of the people who
my
downfall, could come t o you and tell you
anything that will make you angry over
me. I take you as my master and f r i e ~ d .
Dra:h: Though I scarcely go back to my decision,
yet, in view of your kind work about
my person, I have granted you some days
t o have a word with your Fanily..Will you
appreciate that I' am kind enough?
Onyeuku: Drfinitely, youare! I am grateful indeed.
Death: (Smiling and nodding). Remember that I
must come. Perhaps, your people who
might be laughing now, will then be weeping and gnashing their teeth, on thitt terri-

�HOW

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LOVE

ble day. Surely, it is by then, that you will have t o
remember your past performances. Meanwhile. let
me go and take some rest. I have done a lot of
work today. Not less than five hundred people are
t o obey me tomorrow.
Onyeuku: Safe journey Mr Death.
Death: ( With a very low tone ). Thank you very
much, Mr Onyeuku.
(Exit Death)
Onyeuku: ( Pondering ). Thus, man shifts fromthe
life of splendour, to agony. That man w~ll
be
interviewed by death, a monster of that nature,
face to face, still appers t o me, as one of the
mysteries, yet to be solved be experts in anthropology. For, besides them, none other, can.
(Foldmg his arms and with his mouph, wide
open, face looking pale with fear). But, how
will this type of news sound in the ears of the
members of my family? How will the entire
public, react to it? Members of my family,
might take me serious. It is also likely, that
they may feel, that l am telling them lies
or cracking jokes. For, no living man can one
day confirm that he or she, bad never debated
with death. How! How will it be? But was
it in dreamland? No. my eyes were c!ear. The
figure might be back soon. No need wasting
time. For I am no longer, a free man. (Exit)
ACT TWO (SCENE TWO)
Nneka: I wonder why my husband Onyeuku, has
not come to the dining room for food. It is now
fifteen minutes after two o' clock.
Emeka: Dad, rather seems late to luncheon today.
Nduhuisi: I am surprised to see that my brother
Onyeuku eats more food, these days. In the

�HOW

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LOVE

past, he did not attach importnce to afternoon
meal. (Enter Onyeuku, looking sad and disgusted)
Ada: Papa, I wonder why you chose to punish me
today. You very well know, that I cannot eat in
your obsence.
Onyeuku: I am very sorry for that, my little daughter
Ndubuisi: That might not be correct. 1 also thought
so at first But later on, I found out that both the
sellers and the buyers, were all victims of the gloom.
Onyeuku: (Smiling). When a man sees what is by
fat' greater than he can bear there will be no
alternative, than to yield.
Ikem: Yield to what? T o what! I say! No! Not
me forever. ( Emptjing a tumbler of bear).
Nneka Of course, it depends upon the circumstance.
Ikem: (Emptying anolhcr tumhler of bear ). I care
less for m y type of circumstance I damn the
consequence.
Onyeuku: (Standing up). Let us be serious. Infact I
have only some day more to live. I am already
a dead mnn.
Ndubuisi God forbids.
Ikem: I wonder why you try to joke over serious
matters. How will such a dream as this come truet
when you are not sick, even now. that a fun!
Never in histcry, had any persol1 known when
to die.
Ada: O!papa, d o not say so! If you die now, who
will help mum to care for us? (Onyeuku shndding
tears and looking at his - children. )
Emcka I am indeed s~:rprised.I do not know uhat
nex! to do.

�HOW

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LOVE

Nneka My husband actually means his speech.
Ndubuisi Certainly, he is serious.
Ikem: Serious over what? T o die how? My bcs3m
friend to die. How does know.?
Onyeuku It was rewaled to me. ( All of them burst
into tears.
Exeunt
Act 2 ( Scene I )
Entered Death and Four of his Messengers.
Death: (Pinting at one old man). Get hold of
him be has spent very many years on earth.
Old man: Am I the oldest man today?
Death: Shut up your mouth and obey me at once.
( The man dies).
1st Msger: T o where again Sir?
Death: G o to the market and get up to so people.
Second messenger should go to the Ocean and
sink the ship, make sure that many people were
got. Tbird messenger should be in the air
and crash aeroplanes, while the fourth goes
to cause motor accident. I shall go personally
to Onyeuku and get him to my Kingdom.
All: Your orders must be obeyed Sir, They go
while Death makes for Onyeuku's residence.
(Exeunt)
Act 2 (Scene two)
Ooyeuku: Neither sorrow, n o r tears, can disuade
death from executing his evil intentions. It is
now necessary that I must be separated from
you. "Death is an inevitable end of man horn
af a woman, and must come. when it will. All
that I pray is that my memory should remain
indelible into your memories for my part,
it is now finish with existence.
Act 2 (Scene Two)
Onyeuku: Oh, but if I were a bachelor, I could
have happily gone away; knowing that 1 have

�HOW

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LOVE

nothing to think of. Now, the situation is
different. There is no iota or doubt, that this
tragedy, will be a big blow to my family;
friends and relatives. Oh, death! Thou wickcd
monster that will always refuse to be bribed.
I am now at your mercy! Take me to any place
that you might deem fit, for it is 'through you:
that I shall get to my fore-fathers.
Only some hours more to go. Poor, Onyeuku
will no more eat, or drinlc. Ooly some months
more to go, the memeries of Oayeuku, will all
be forgetten. It is sure that I must be taken by
the cold lands, of death. Bravely however, I
shall confrmt it all as others had. Perhaps, it
is time. Oh! the memory of my children who
will be left as orphans pains me greatly. The die
is now case: Terrible! Oh! How painful it is to
part from loved once! This i s question of must.
(Enter Nneka, Ndubuisi, Emeka, Ada) Nithher
tears no sorrows can cease the situation.
Ndubuisi: This talk again?
Onyeuku: You might sesse from bzing a Thomas
when everything is pracrically dzrnonwated
Well Emka it is up to you to comfront your
mother Nneka brust into tears ) Stay well with
your sister too. Although you seem too young
to manage a family, just now yzt the will of fate
and dsting must be obeyed.
Ada: Papa when will you return?

�HOW

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LOVE

Onyeuku: O! tender child, Quite ingnorant of what
is being said! ( Ndubuisi ) folds his arms and
looks at his brother in surprise) My only daughter, when is time, you will meet me there.
(Enter Ikem)
Onyeuku: My house shou!d not be kept in
confusion when the tragic period comes, 1 have
uever been a confusionist.
Ikem: The death will spare wicked men and
easily take the quite ones is something that
greatly baffles my intelligence. O! Onyeuku,
Is this the way in which we are to part?
Death! come too! come I say and take me
away. What next are you leaving me for.
Onyeuku: If were something that can be prevented
by force or money, I would have tried my best.
But as it is, I stand confused now as to what
else to do than to obey the call. Since all of
are preseni, and are quite aware of the entire
catastrophe, I shall not regard myself as some
body who might have dsed intestate., I now
declare in the presence of living witness that I
bequeath my estate to my son Emeka, there is
no atom of doubt that everything is now, settled. Things may be however what they seem.
I shall be the last man to be all that worried,
since death is the lot of all human beings,
( Exeunt )
Act Three
Scene One
Benson: Ladies and gentlemen, I have assembled
all of you to this place, so ?hat you can come
along and share the joy of the day, with me.
Each and every one of you can easily tell, what
it is, to heve a wile, who might have safely

�HOW

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PLA

LOVE

given birth to a child infact, it is for that
purpose, I have determined not to be alone,
but to be in merriment, with you. There might
be money or not. But, it will be much to my
own pleasure to afford the little presents that I
have. Life may be hard or soft. But, I am solely
determined, to conquer, all the difficulties, in
my way t o success. (They cheer him ) As
a matter of fact, I could have been very
much let down. But as a resuit of true friendship,
I had nothing t o lose.
Jasper: We have actually heard a great deal cf your
sayings. Even though that be the case, I am opined that things should go in the right form.
However, 1 d o not blame you at all. At ?he
same time. it will be unfair of me, to pounce
upon your opponent, merely for the sake of
satisfylog your own very desire. At any rate. I
am pleased over the way, in which things are
going, at the moment. Your entertainments, I
shall have to take. Thank you very much.
Joseph. It is true, that I tend t o be one of the
most significant figures here, when talking in
terms of those, who are somehow.
related to Benson. It cannot be disputed, that
both of us are quite friendly. Truly, about
the most intimate of friends, that might have
ever existed. Some people are actually well to do. There are others too, who are not all
that. Whatever might have been the case, it wi!l
not be advisable, for one section. parrlcularly
the wealthy side, to despise the poor. For every
body is levelled. by six feet of earth, which ought
to be for all.

-

�HOW

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LOVE

Benson: Well, ladies and gentlemen, I am sayinp
without any type of prejudice, that some of
these people, who think that money can d o
everything for them, might be a bit mistaken. I
have no doubt, that you might have heard of
or even known, one Onyeuku, 1 actully approached him, when 1 was in a type of financial difficulty. Truly, he subjugated me to series o f ,
tortures and in the end, made a ridicule, of it
all. I am not determined to blame him. But
then, he ought to have been in sympathy, with
my own situation and then, reconsider my stand,
in the .whole affair. At any rate, I am not in the
least, perturbed.
Jasper: Let the ugly past be forgotten. I have no
doubt that the Almighty God, will d o his wish.
Joseph: That also, is my own plea. All t h a t ~ I
ask,
is for God's own protection, over this woman
( Exeunt )
and her child forever.

ACT THREE ( SCENE TWO )
Death: Mr. Onyeuku, I have now come!
~ n y e u k u : I have actually found out that I cannot
resist. Take me therefore, to anywhere, that you
will.
Nneka: Master! I understand that your name is
Death. Will you please not mind pardoning my
husband?
Death: In Fairness of it my dear lady, business is
to
business. I am sure, that you will not l ~ k e
joke over your business. Thus, tbisis mine infact,
I cannot help it a t all. Your husband must be
taken away. Hiscut is now full. When it is your
own time too, you will undoubtedly have to
come along. No amount of plea, will disuade

�HOW

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LOVE

me from my own determination. As a matter of
fact, 1 helped him very much. In reality, I. d o
not inform people when I wish. t o visit them.
But Oiyeuku is the man that I like very much
and it will be very unfair t o snatch him away
from his family, without notice, hence I gave
him a hint to prepare.
Ndubuisi: Does it then go to mean that you can take
any person whenever you choose to d o so ?
Death: Well Mr. Man,the whole thing is that I have
m y time table with m, whicb acts like a typeof
:
'schedule. Every body's name, is therein listed.
You might be the next person t o come. But,
since I have not come to you, it i s sure that you
might only have t o brag. But my arrival is sure.
Truly, by letting him know in time. .Actually
some. ptople might spoil me, by branding me
bad. I am not so. Please hold on, for your own
turn.
Ikem: That is nonsense !
Death: You may choose it so t o be. But I a m not
worried. The whole thing is thatonyeuku must
I repeat must, come along with me. Your own
time is coming, You may not even have the
mouth t o say this when it is time. Onyeuku !
Onyzuku ! Come along !Come along I a t once
and let us go: Forge: everythig about your property, wife and children.
Emeks: Since it appears that you d o not seem t o
have any mercy, I d o not know, what next, to do.

�HOW

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LOVE

Death: I pity all of you. In fact, I do not come
out for bad. Please, bear any type of inconvenience, like that. I must have to vist teach and
every person. It anly depends upon the time.
1 wish you good-luck in all your own undertakings.
Nneka: I had thought that even that most wicked
people, have some considerations at times.
Death: Madam, I cannot do otherwise. I am sure
that 1 have actually spoken at length. Let it be,
that whatever name you may call me right now,
I shall be prepared to answer. But, there is one
thing. I cannot Iqve Mr. Onyeuku. He is to
get along with me.
Ikem: It simply appears that you are adamant to
all the please of all of us?
Death: Positive! I maintain! Take yourself to be
i n m y own position surely, you will do likewise.
Nneka: Afterwards, the whole thing, has come to
an end. Onyeuku is gone, much to the joy of
his enemies.
Benson: I had thought that big men do not die.
The thing is that it will not be advisable, for a
big man to despise a poor man and feel that he
is the all in all. Fortune meets people mistakenly.
Ude: The man who promised to skin me, is now
gone. But however, he did me a world of good.
For, he pardoned me, my deabt.
Ikem, All said and done, the thing has come to
an end. At any rate, no person can tell, when
it is his or her own turn, to kick the bucket.

�HOW

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LOVE

H e who does good, it is for him and he y h o
does bad, it is also for him.
Ude: Mr. Death, is there no consideration for this
man?
Death: I am very sorry indeed. I have actually
wasted a lot of my own time. If I could have
considered him, you might have been late t o
meet me.
Benson: But remember, that he is a big man, whose
death, might n3t be appriciated by many people.
D z a ~ h : That is actually what I want it all to be,
Ikem: But do you think that you are very powerful?
Death, That might be well answered, when I come
to you.
Ikem: Shut up your mouth! When are you coming.
Why not now, idiot?
Death: No more time to waste. ( H e strikes Onyeuku dead and disappears at once. )
Onyeuku- ( A m ~ d stears) It now has become quite
t
apparent, that I must have to abandon all my
proposals and family and get along with my
sister - death.
( Enter Ude )
Ifact. I am going to a strnage land; I d o not
know any person there. It might therefore, be
difficult for me to make friends. However. Ude,
you have now come here and I am sure, that i t
is for the settlement of the debt. Take it. 1 hate
now granted you a pardon.Please, pray for my
own soul.
( Enter Benson )
1 also apologise to all those, that I might have
wronged, in one way, or the other. Please, pardon me and only look after my family. By the
grace of God, we shall meet again.

�HOW

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LOVE

ACT THREE ( SCENE 3 ).
Death: (Sitting down comfortably and with his legs
crossed ) What a very busy day! Infact, I must
have to congratulate myself, for all my activities,
within the month.
( Enter Onyeuku, conducted by one of death's
Officers )
Ha! Ha! Ha! There is no doubt that this is Mr.
Onyeuku, the man who knew what is means, to
have my orders, disobeyed. Surely, this is my
own palace. You might have seen for yourself,
a bit of what goes on here. How do you like
the place?
Onyeuku: .4lthough I am quite a new man to this
kingdom, yet, I shall not hesitate to let YOU
know, that as far as I am concerned, there 1s
nothing very worthy of a major criticism. Men
and women are lively and the place looks quite
gay and disciplined
Death: I am indeed happy, to hear you say so.
This is a place, where people are free from worries of all types. There is no question of sweating
very much for daily bread and running very
fast, in pursuit of money. Here, communism
is practised to the very last meaning of the
word. This is one of the reasons why I pity men
whenever their families cry in sorrow of my
having them snatched away. But i t will be interesting to note, that those who come here, scarcely wish to get out.
Officer: Pardon please your worship, May I know
what type ofjob to which this new member
should be assigned?
Death: Of course, that is very much in line, with
I
the system here E! M ( Scratching his head )
H e is to clean my shoes everyday. Hey l Mr.

�HOW

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LOVE

Onyeuku, do you know how to clean shoes properly?
Onyeuku: I shall have to rehearse that once mcre.
For while in the
world. Ican assure you, that I had servants who
did various types of jobs for me including even
this that 1 am now to do for somebody else. In
reality, it has taken not less then ten years, since
I did that last.
Death: Ha! Ha! Ha! That is what you people, d o
over there. Any of you ones idering himself
wealthy, would at once grow lazy. See now, you
have come to a place, where there is no form of
discrimination. If the smallest person, receives
twelve strokes of rhe cane, you wdl likewise be
treated. ( Handling a cup of beer, while Onyeuku looks at him eagerly ) When in the other
world, you enjay yourself very much. But here,
there is no time for that. Perhaps you are interested i n taking a cup of wine as I am now doing.
,
Is that correct?
Onyeuku: Most certainly, it is.
Death: But it is a pity. No person who comes to this
kingdom dominated by me, ever drinks. He will
only look at me, enjoying myself to the full and
will not participate.
Onyeuku: Kindly allow me even a sip of the cup.
Death: I am sorry my man. That, will be a
violation of our principles here. However, I am
getting ready for a convention and I hope that
you wlll very soon adapt yourself, to the environment. We are good. We are kind and we are
the real peace loving citizens. At the same time,
I must not fail to let you know that, anything
wrongly done here, is seriously accounted for,
by -the doer.
43

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I may or may not know. There are sufficient
and able lieutenants of mine, who can deal
with various issues. So, in your own interest,
I reveal this, since I am only in the position to
give commands, which must be executed, without acy disobedience. (He leaves for the
convention).
Officer: Thenext phase of it all, is to appzar before
a iurv.
0nyedcu; What for?
Officer: Here, it is always the policy of "NO
ANSWERS T O QUESTIONS." Take note
of this.
(Enter the Jury)
Prosecutor: Where is Onyeuku?
Onyeuku: I am here. your lordship.
Prosecutor: You are commaded to stand properly,
before his lordship and confess all that you did
on earth. Remember that you will be cross
examined.
Onyeuku: When I was on earth, I did certain
things in order that I might become weahby.
The first was to sacrifice my mother to the God
of wealth. The second, was to cheat and oppress poor men and widows. That was not all.
I bought one lorry, that would always convey
robbers, from one place to the other for plunder. At the end of operations, I would have
to share the booty, with them, But people did
not suspect that I was transacting a business of
that nature. For so it is, that when people see
a man who drives in a car, they feel that he
is above dishonesty.

�TO

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LOVE

Cnyeuku: That is all I can remember, your lordship
Associate Judge: Why then d o you bring this man
here? His record does not seem as blcck as
thought. It ought to b s noted , that we a r e
to give people fair trial, s o as to be 'released
from the pangs of conscience.
Prosecutor: May your lordship listen to prosecution
witnesses?
Associate Judge: Where are thev? Callthem UD
at once. There are many people to be tired
and if you have not prepared your case will,
this man, can be discharged and acquitted
a t once, for want of evidence.
Prosecutor: Selinah!
(Enter Selinah and she goes direct to the
witness box ) D o you know this =an who
stands here as a n accused?
Selinah: Yes, your lordship.
Prosecutor: For good o r for bad? Explain to
the court.
Selinah: The man standing as an accused., is
known as Onyeuku. He was my first husband
and I was the first woman, that he married.
Prosecutor: Why did both of you separate.
Selinah: I t was one night, when he conducted his
lady friend inlo my room and introduced her
to me. But in actual fact, Goth of us were
legitimately married in the court and afterwards,
went to a priest and received some blessing.
I cou!d not therefore, look to another and Ge
too, was bound by law, to be in the same s a t e
with me. After some hours, the lady left and
of course, that wzs not wi:hout hearing a noisy
quarrel, going on between my husband and
me. I. clearly pointcd it out to Onyeuku,
that I would expose.
-

-

-

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the matter and have him disgraced. At once,
he got infuriated and with a bicycle chain
around my neck, he strangled me to death. He
dug a grave that every night and let low my
corpse.
Chief Judge: Onyeuku, have you any questions t o
ask her?
Onyeuku: None your lordship Her evidence is
quite correct.
Chief Judge: 1 am sure, that apart from this, there
is no other hidden deed of his ?
Prosecutor: Yes, your lordship.
Chief Judge One thing that men and women seem
t o forget, is that all their deeds arc always recorded by some unseen hands. I suspect that they
simply feel that they can do anyth~ngand run
away from it, provided they are not seen by
people. One of the offences we regard grave
here, is tbat of killing somebody. For, by so
doing, out kingdom is overpopulated and souls
are sent to us, at odd time, Well, without wasting time, the punishnent, should be inflicted.
( An officer administers twelve strokes of the
cane on the buttocks of Onyeuku. ) So far, so
good for the day. We should close up. Until we
are needed again.
(Exeunt )
All: As the court pleases.

ACT THREE (SCENE 4 )
Clerk: During the last convention, Life was the
chairman. This time, in accordance with the
stipulated constituion Death is to occupy the
chair. ( Death gets up and takes the seat, to the
applause of his supporters. )

�HOW TO

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LOVE

Dcath: Tam pleased to have been appointed, to
direct the meeting. I assure all of ycu, that it
is my intention, to try my best, in seeing that
ever) thlng, is will carried out. There are no new
member and so, it is believed that each and
e./ery person here, knows exactly when to say
something and what t3 say.
I t is usual, that an account of stewardship by
each and every officer, is the first item on the
agenda.
Accident: During t5e last convention, I was ordered to bring nine hundred and nighty eight
persons, into our kindom. Within the first six
months, I was able to get sixty five people,
through road accidents, fifty. Two, by air and
after sinking a launch which made one hundred
and twenty people on board, perish, I had as
my to:al ,two hundred and thirty seven soul,
For the next six months, the statistics, stood
a s follows. lorry crashes -- two hundred people
dead. Aeroplane disaster one hundred and fifty
people and one train accident in which o r e
hundred and seventy four souls, were f o ~di
missing. Thus, on the whole, I was able to can;eplete the figureof nine hundred a n j nlnety c @ r

-

Death:

You did a very good work indeed.

. Life: May I know the exacr number of people,
that we agreed upon, to be taken away from me
last year?
Clerk: On the whole, it was five thousand.

�HOW

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Life: But my own record shows that five thousand
and fifty persons, were taken away. What might
have brought about the surplus.
Death: I feel that it would be more convenient to
go gradually. After !istening to the activities of
the officers, then, we can easily know, where we
went wrong.
War: I was ordered to combine' with Trouble,
Hunger and Suicide. to get the balance of four
thousand and two people. One inter-tribal war,
gave us three thousand people. Hunger then,
rushed out and brought more one thousand and
upon finding out that two more were needed.
Suicide, stepped in and got them. Thus, we
completed the number. But 1 still have got a
remark to make. Peace. has found much pleasure
in challenging me, whenever I am on duty. In
some cases, he even overpower me, since he
knows our secrets. I am hereby appealing to all
officers, for co-operation in the execution of
our respective duties.
Peace: Look care Mr. Wat! I actually challenged
you as you said. I also, shall continue to do so,
until you send back or account properly. for
the fifty people, taken away from our own kingdom. If you d o not, then you should bear in
mind, that I shall always resist your attempts to
take away people from me. If possible Mr. War,
1 would not mind having theissue out with you,
personally.
War: I suspect that you are not in your correct
senses. Infact, you are talking arrant nonsense.
It is just like a speech. made by a little boy.
Who are you?

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Peace: Damned fool of your own type! A person
who can only be out for destruction. D o you
at times sit down and think a little bit of what
people talk about you! Bloody scamp!
War: I find it a waste of time, to exchange words
with your corward. People on earth, might talk
anything about me. Infact, I do not care. That
is how, those in my own kingdom are also
talking bad of you too.
Love: Well Mr. War, please cool down yourself.
Mr. Peace, should also d o the same. If tempers
begin lo rise like this, the meeting might have
to end in a fiasco. ( War and Peace, shut up
their mouths ).
Birth: There might not be much need for my own
speech. As commanded, I transfered five thousand people safely, from Mr. Death's Kingdom,
to Mr. Life.
Death! From where then, comes the difference ?
Did any officer take more than he was ordered?
(Silence for a while.
( Every officer, re.cheking his list )

Trouble: I now remember one thing.
Life: What can it be ?
Trouble: There are some, that keep on knocking
at the gate a t odd hours when asked how they
were brought, they cannot explain. They have
no tickets and so, and keep on roaming from
one end to the other.

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Death:I have now come t o know, the cause of that.
There are some, who fall c n their fellow people,
out of anger and kill them right away. Since it
might not have been, the time we expected such
a victim, the soul keeps on walking to and for
Thus, such will neither be for lrfe, nor for me.
Even in my kingdom, not less than forty souls
have appeared and given evidence against their
murderers. Truly, we d o not encourage murder
and my chief judge, is always ready to apply
disciplinary measures, whenever such is noticed.
In fairness of it all Mr. Life, you will then
appreicate, that I have not robbed you. It is
only a mistake on the part of tbe people your in own
kingdom Right from time, we had worked
co operatively and it is my most ardent wish
thatsuch parity should always be maintained.
Life: Thank you very much Mr Death, for your
statement, which has now thrown light, into the
whole issue. It can now be seen, that none of
us is wrong and so. tempers should no longer
rise. Let us forget the past-indeed, the exchange
of words, which took place between one of
your lieutenants and mine. Really, they are not
small boys and they ought not be reminded,
to apologise, without hesitatio one t o the other.
War. Well Mr. Peace, I am very sorry for what
had earlier taken place. Please pardon me, for
any bad statement, that I might have made.
Peace. Goodbye to skirmish. Let us re dedicate
ourselves to our duties. Mr. War, J am sorry
for causing you an inconvenience. (Both of
them shake hands and smile,)

-

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Death: I have very well come to realise that everybody is alive to his job. P'else. let us get along
like this and hope to ahieve a great future.
Exeunt

ACT FOUR ( SCENE 1 )
Ikem: Well, my friend Onjeuku is dead.
Nneka: That is, as clear as crystal. I cannot help
it. I am only pleased, that you, his personal frlend, were here during the most part of the incident. You now can see, that I have automatic
ally become a widow, at this ycung age, sequal
ofcourse, to no direct fault of mine. I am just
like a sheep, without a shepherd. Infzct, just like
a ship without a pilot. Whither I head to, is not
easy for me to tell. Emeka, my only son is still
young. Indeed, too young, to manage a family.
Ndubuisi, my husband's bcother, is very greedy
and jealous. Onyeuku's dcath: has come to dislocate the entire frame-work, of the family. The
days of Cowfort, seem to have vanished. My
former greatness, is now, something to be told
as a tale to children, during moonlight.
ikem: You may no doubt realise, that I am still a
bachelor.
Nneka: That, I very well know. But in what way,
d o you think that it will help, solve the problem
that I now face?
Ikem: My l a t ~friend's wife Nntka. Please note,
men are one at all times and every-where. What
might differ, is the position, as far as fortune is
concerned. However, please be satisfied with
the fact that no man or woman, was born together with a bag of gold.

51

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I concede, that the material thing is life. He who
has it, will be capable of doing anything of his,
own wish, provided there is the chance
I am fully confident, that, hope combined with
a burning ambition, will offer such challenge t o
misfortune, that neither the devil, can stand.
What seems'to matter more in life, is peace and
not pieces. With this family, I had been
infimate. That is entirely, beyond all reasonable
doubts. It is as clear as dayliqht. Again,
you can easily confirm, that I had not on
any occasion, misconducted myself, either to
the annoyance of your own self, or my
late friend Onyeuku. Thus, with implicit
confidence, 1 maintain, that you can be proud
of me. By this time ofcourse, you can also tell
about my character. It will cause me a lot
of tears, to see my friend's wife languish in agony,
f
because of the inevitable lcss o the pillar
of the family. If and only but if. you can
agree, as 1 feel that you might like to consider, I would not mind drawing nearer you.
it is in this way I presume, what might have
been deemed lost, can be regained, Further,
Nneka. it would be ungrateful of me, to refuse
to let you know, that you were the main cause
fo my friendship, with your husband. Earlier,
I had been contemplating upon having a secret
deal with you, during Onyeuku's life time. But,
just as if plans had worked exactly in accordance with my hopes, he

�HOW

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kicked the bucket, ofcourse, not at all, to my
cwn joy. At arly rate, it is indeed, something
that we cannot help. Let us therefore, say goodbye to the past and face nothing but the present.
Yaur graceful manners, together with your
personal charm, often compel me run crazy, anyday,
that I kil to catch a glimpse of this face, which is
as bright as the morning sun. Your shape alone, is
not to be rivalled, by any other. Truly, I feel that
it will be very unnecessary of me, to say all that you
might have heard me say. For, you are also a living witness to my behaviour towards you. If 1 am
talking a lie, please, without any reservalion, prove
me! Prove me at once 1 say-much to my own disgrace !
Nneka; You are not wrong in any from.
Ikem:

Wellthen, what next?Shall we have to wait
for Onyeuku to rise form the dead and instruct us so to do, before wc become active?
Surely, if the dead see, he will be very
grateful for this approach of mine.
Nneka: How then will my consent, ring in the ears
of people, particularly, those who might
have hated my husband, when be was alive?
Ikem:

Leave that for me. I shall be prepared to
face the scandal My long association with
Onyeuku, actually tutored me a great deal.
Today, 1 can surmount an insurrection,
in all its ramifications. The personaiity of
Onyeuku, has been gently transfered to me.
It is by his own spiritual guidance, that I
move In the dream, he tells me many things

�HOW

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LOVE

which 1 shall not be prepred to reveal to
even my own mother. Now Nneka, let us
bes eriaus.

I am not acting on my own directives. Only
promise me your love and also, have that effected,
at once. Agree that I have become your own sincere
husband and I shall take you as my own beloved
wife. (Looking at her, straight in the eyes, smiling
and holding her arm)
Nneka: It is not difficult to agree that I am your
wile. Infact, If f had not loved you enough,
you could have proved that too. But what binders
our getting closely tied up together, is just one thing
and that is how will my children or the entire family
reach to this new atreement?
Emeka is there. At the moment, he is regarded
as a small boy. But in reality, he is not all that. He
can easdy know what is wrong. Again, Ndubuisi is
a full ffetched man. I t is possible that he might
form an opinion, which can be detrimental to the
tranquility of both of us. However, in doing that,
he ought to be supported by even, public opinion.
When people are hastily after something, they d o
not seem to mdke out some chance to think over
certain delicate issues, they might be involved. See
now, it can safely be said, that in order to achieve
our ends, both of us, had to conspire and kill
Onyeuku. We cannot escape the allegation. We
shall therefore, be subjected to scandal, contempt
and ridicule. Witb what face, can I then stand

-

�HOW

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LOVE

amidst my fellow women and have a say ? there,
will be many opponets and of course, the end
might have to mean much, if not tragic. In truth,
In truth, I do not disagree to your request. For,
it is really quitedifficult, for a women to remain
for years, without a man. I know for certain,
that death is a national catastrophe, from which
no person can escape. Tnat is very sure. But
at the same time, you ought to realise, what
I am particularly afier. Towards this, I would
like you, to give the matcer, a second thought.
(Enter Ada)
Ikem: If men were only listening to what people say,
things could have not been executed in the
normal form. (Ada running into ikem's laps
and crying, Papa! Papa!) There you are.!
Everything now seems to have been made qui'te
manifest to you. Let them say anything they
like. Forget that and let us execute the proposal
and thus? prevent further distress. I assure you,
that it w~il in any form, strain relations.
not
Nneka: I need not to say more. (They kiss)
Ikem: Am 1 now your husband?
Nneka: Yes I am your wife.
Ikem: Truely, together, shall we enjoy the beauty,
and prestige ofthis house, by the grace
and glory of God.
Exeunt

(ACT FOUR ( SCENE 4)
As one of the elders of this town, I have actueIly found it necessary to summon all the citizens
together, so that we can decide upon what steps
to take, in finding a person, to take the place
of Onyeuku.
55

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All of you, are fully aware of the fact, that
Onyeuku, when al~ve,was our chief. Today, things
seem to be going very wrong, since there IS no
ruler. It should be made clear, that if we continue
like this it then simply means, that we are heading
towards a di5aster Fellow old men, youths and
women, let us all join hands and make our town,
respectable and dignifying.
However let it be clearly understood, that I am
not longing for the post, since it is something that
can be done by means birthright.
Thank you Sir. On behalf of the youncg men of
this town, I stand up here to move that, the question
of having a chief, should be by election. Infact, I d o
not support dictatorship. Our former chief I am
sorry to say, was very much hard-hearted. He had
no regard for the poor people. In truth, he felt that
any man favoured by fortune should torture the less
fortunate. I d o not belleve. that this ought to happen
in a free society, where democracy, is daily harped
on. For my part, I do not even pray, to have a ruler.
At the same time, I will be interested t o know, who
is to be tipped for the position. In my own eyes at
the moment, no person seems fit.
Joseph: 1 may not find it easy, to agree with you. I
have not got much to say. Give the right thing,
to the r:ght man and that is good.
Kingmaker: Even while in the dream, I was instructed to allow Emeka his right.
All: Yea! Right choice ! Grown him !
Kingmaker: Now I consider the opposers as very
unfortunate indeed Thus, let it be know this day,
that Emeka, the son of late chief Onyeuku, has taken
over nls fathers stool.
Em-kn: lam grat efui. Inspite of my lender age, J
promise to do my best,. with your full-coperation,
of course.
56

��How Tshombe and Mubotu regrettG
the death -of Lumumba

-

14.

HOW get a lady irr love.
fo

..

.

Olritrhr - Nigeria.

�</text>
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                <text>How to play love</text>
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                <text>Stephen, Felix N.</text>
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              <elementText elementTextId="125439">
                <text>Onitsha, Nigeria : Njoku &amp; Sons</text>
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            <name>Date</name>
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              <elementText elementTextId="125440">
                <text>ca. 1962?</text>
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                <text>Nigerian literature (English)</text>
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                <text>This quirky yet refreshing play by Felix Stephen (a.k.a. Nathan Njoku) does not spell out a clear moral or seek to be prescriptive, unlike many of the Onitsha plays. In addition, the misogyny is downplayed. In many ways the play's title is not a clear representation of its message, since death trumps love (and money) here. A somewhat disjointed story, How to Play Love lacks the development of other plays written under the name of Nathan Njoku that appear here in the Onitsha Market Literature Collection. Each act of these four-act plays could stand on its own, and none of the plots or characters have much impact on the other acts.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The play begins with the search by Uba (the main character of the first act)for a prospective lover. He tells the audience that he will "play love and will, [sic] not care what people may say," (pg. 5). However, he appears somewhat inept at the game. He approaches the first two candidates through letters because he was too tongue-tied to seek them out in person. He declares that since love is a magnet, there is "no need of rejecting me," (pg. 5). Neither letter nor approach receives a desired response. Uba then decides to try to be more direct.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;This is how he meets a vampire, Helen Nwamma, who would happily take him as a lover, albeit with a few conditions. Uba finds some of these conditions distasteful. He states "my approach of you, might have been somehow misdirected . . . Please, I can now say goodbye to the request that I had earlier made. I shall always continue to be liking you," (pg. 13-14). Uba discovers that he does care what other people may think, and he realizes that not all beautiful women are good partners.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The second half of this act brings in Onyeuka (the rich man), Abel (a friend of Uba's), Agnes (Abel's wife), and Margaret (Abel's lover). Abel and Agnes have recently married and are having difficulties. Abel flees to Margaret, and he discovers that Margaret also wants to get married. Abel tells both women that he is not a man to be trifled with. He runs into Uba, who tells him of his fearful encounter with Helen. All four end up locked in a room with a gun.Uba mistakes Agnes for Helen. Helen, the vampire, serves as a warning against powerful, demanding and beautiful women. This mistake is fateful and reveals some of the underlying misogynistic logic of the play. Agnes, like Helen, is unreasonably demanding and bloodsucking. One can only assume that this mistake costs Uba his life, as Abel ushers them all into the room and murders Uba,Margaret and Agnes before committing suicide.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The second act begins with a rich man, Onyeuku, declaring that rich men are immune to death. Thus begins the other main story line--a declaration that the power of money and the privilege of wealth have limits, for Death reigns supreme. This message continues for the remainder of the play, and each of the following acts show how Onyeuku is punished for his rich life. The final insult occurs as his loving wife happily marries his best friend.</text>
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                <text>This Item is protected by copyright and/or related rights. However, for this Item, either (a) no rights-holder(s) have been identified or (b) one or more rights-holder(s) have been identified but none have been located. You are free to use this Item in any way that is permitted by the copyright and related rights legislation that applies to your use.</text>
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                <text>&lt;a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC-RUU/1.0/"&gt;http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC-RUU/1.0/&lt;/a&gt;</text>
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Ik..P
P

��BEAUTIFUL MARIA

''EMMAN

&amp; MARIA''

Published &amp; Obtainable from:-

MICHAEL ALLAN OHAEJESI
17 Bright Street Onitsha.

c A v ? A n m

216
Copy Right Reserved.

Net Price.

��Contents
Act one, scene one, the tussle

5

Act two, the love tutelage

8

Act two; scene one; the confession

15

Act two, scene two, the meeting.

18

Act three, the end of love journey.

24

Extra love dealers.

31

Wise sayings and advices

38

�PREFACE
This is a drama, specially prepared for African readers anc!.
actors. I t is a comedy which suits men aad women of all classes.
To children, it portrays more of the type of life which ought to
be led by youths of decent character when engaged in love
affairs.
Like my other drama pieces, I have no doubt that readers
will equally enjoy it. The language is quite simple, infact such
that it could easily be understood by anybody who can read
a little.
The characters used here are very fictitious and bear no
form of relationship whatsoever to any existing persons, since
the stories are in the main imaginary.
This is an original work of the author and any person or
persons who wish to dramatise it should obtain permission from
the publishers.

FELIX N. STEPHEN
(Dramatic)

�ACT I SCENE 1
THE TUSSLE
M y master Emmanuel has refused eating anything for two days now.
DAVID: IS he undertaking some religious fast?
JOE: Not at all! It is rather awkward! He has been
worried in mind over his failure in gaining the
love of Maria.
DAVID: But he is quite handsome and many other
girls are after him.
JOE:

JOE:

Well David, tastes differ! Maria has frankly told
me that she will prefer me to my master. I
very much wonder what the result of such an
undertaking will have on m!, future a poor page
of my own type without any type of attraction.

I like your master very much. If I were a
girl, I would not hesitate to rush to him and
ask him to be in friendship with me. You imay'
not think youiself attractive. But there is no
doubt that Maria might have seen some attractive qualities in you, hence her statement. Handsomeness is not the only attraction a man can
have. I have seen some ugly men who at the
same time attractive. It might be through a
man's gait of walking, how he barbs his hair,
fashion, emoothness of the skin, how he laughs
or comports himself or even how much he can
d o at boxing or footballing o r racing, In short,
sportsmen are always liked by girls. But what
do you think of your master's treatment of
your person?
In the first place, according to what he presents
himself to be -

DAVID:

JOE:

�before me he is no less than any gentleman.
Again he is kind. I can assure you that, I
make quite a good sum from him every weekend.
He is liberal. Many people think that both of
us are brothers. He scolds me in private when
I go the wrong way but defends me in public
when any person underestimates me. I d o not
wish to leave him in time anyway.

I wish I can get a master like that. I was
once living with one big rascal. A very chronic
drunkard, a chain smoker and in his sight, every
ugly women is beautiful. He would come home
every night after all the pubs might have closed,
staggering, cursing, swearing and vomitting. I
was ashamed of him. One day I could not brook
his treatment of me anymore and so went back
to my parents. It was my sole intention to
remain in his house not minding his fooly. But
he would starve me at times and then g2t into
the pubs for drinking of liquor. That is why
you see me still living with my paren!s. D o you
not think that you can help this man who has
been all that kind to you?

DAVID:

JOE:

What else can I do? Maria has said that she
does not want to hear any message from him
any mcre.
In any case, if your master returns and finds
me sitting at ease in his parlour chatting with
you, do you think that it will not reflect upon
you seriously?

DAVID:

JOE:

Although my msster is not ill-tempered yet,
I feel that he will not be back very soon.
6

�Did he tell you. to..where he was ,going?
Not all that!

DAVID:
JOE:

(ENTER EMMANUEL THE MASTER OF THE HOUSE)

Welcome Sir!
EMMAN: Yes thank you! Anjr person looked for me?
JOE Nobody Sir.
DAVID (Standing) Welcon~eSir.
EMMAN y e s my friend Welcome too Joe, Is he your
friend?
JOE: He is my friend Sir. His name is David.
EMMAN (Giving to Joe) Take this hmmount of five
shillings, buy some light refreshments for your
friend and after that send this letter of mine
to Maria. But Joe, (patting him on the right
shoulder) try to pull your weight before her.
Present me in a reasonable way. If you succeed
I shall reward you nicely. Meanwhile, I am
going out. I hope to get Fomz good news from
you, on my return.
JOE: I shall do as you commanded. Thanks Sir!
DAVID: I am very grateful to you Sir!
(EMMANUEL LEAVES)
What? Is this man like this?

lo@: told you!
I
DO not worry again. We must convince
Maria. Let us only hit a t a plan.
JOE: I understand that many people have tried her
and failed!
DAVID:

7

�That does-not matter! Take me by my words!
She does not know me, does slic?
JOE: She does not !(now you at all.
DAvrD: I shdl go in your company to her. In that
case I shall use my mouth very well.
JOE: That will be a grmt assistant.: indeed. But I
hope your father will not be dfended?
DAVID: No person wtll tell him.
JOE: Thank you. L&amp; us go.
DAVID:

(BOTH OF THEM LEAVE)

ACT 1 E

N 2

THE LCVE TUTELAGE

I have blzen approached by Inany suitors, but
I find it qui!p: difficult, to take a d~cision.
TIIERL'SA: Coes it sitiwly go to m a n that none of
them measurcs up to expcctatian?
MARIA: MoI:~
of them are presentabl?. But inf-ct
Theresa I only want to n;sks wri. that he to
whom I shall agree to give my hand will not
disappoint me later on. It is for this sake that
1 am of the opinion to give trials to many mco.
He who succecds will do so, out of the gravity
of love that he has on mc.
T I I ~ ~ A : yo:^ at this stage no!
Can
guess of any
man that is languishing for not being able to
have secured your love?
MARIA: I haw heard of one Emn~anucl.Really I cat:
not jqst tell if !I= is scrious. I want to give him
a tough time first. If I do not do so, he will
deem me very cheap. His boy often comes here.
MARIA:

��Personally I have many male friends. I do
not like to keep to one. That is why it appears
that I haw got some good amount of money
MARIA: DO YOU think that
all of then1 who come
to you pay the money joyrully?
TIIERESA: Whcther thcy d o o r not is not my rea!
concern. It is my policy that wilkout their
money I do not give out my love.
BIARIA: Can that be taken as trc~eloye?
THERESA: That is why 1 can say IS the best way
for a woman to follow men. They are deceitful. IF you are soft with them, they become
very insultive to you.
MARIA: I will also like to have my own sound experience
of men. But I shall like t o exp-riment on one
man only.
THERESA:

(ENTER JOE AND DAVID)
Oh! my little f ~ i e n dJoe how are you getting
on with things these days?
JOE: Just as usual, thank you! (Hands over a lctter
to Maria)
MARIA: From whom is this?
JOE: A man who bas for some days now been
ianguishing great1 y for having not been able to
h a w your love.
If it is from l o u r maslcr, w d I must have
to suggest to you thst there is no need
waisting rime. 1 had on some cccassions toid
you frankly that I do not want him !o spcsk
to' me on this matter anymore I repeat that if
you would like to comc in as suitor that J
shall not wasl timc to grant.

MARIA:

�I suggest that you read the letter. Who
knows .whether the content might not agree with
the former ones you had receivzd?

THERESA:

DAVID:

1 really see with you!

MARIA:

Against my will I open and read this letter.

JOE:

You may even find it quite interesting.
Does it mean that you read the letter before
bringing it to me?

MARIA:

JOE: I t does ~:otmezn so. I saw the mood in which
he was while

writing it.

I wonder what it is that can convince any
right thinking lady not be pleased with Emmanuel. In the first instance he is presentable,
gentle, straightforward, liberal, inteligent and
above all kind. Again he is optimistic of life.
His fellow men like him and wish that he were
a lady. As young as I am, I see clearly what
some msn tend to prove t o be. If he w x e a
big rascal, I could not have gone near to him.
But he is a good breed and his parents are
noblc. Such a msn i? rare to get in this era.
Were it that love is not just a thing which
cannot be helped Emmanuel, ought to have
been without a companion. From all reports
1 have collected sbout Maria, I could easily
predict that where she and Emmanuel are joiried
up together the joy that will exist in such a
company will be infinite. From my own youthful opinion I could say that tbere is nothing
as good as two people staying together in peace
and harmony. Life without true love appears
to me to be not worth living. Please let me
not be mistaken.

DAVID:

,

�May I keep it crystd clear that I have come
here neither to praise Maria nor Emmanuel.
But I am of the type that without any fear
of contradition approve a good proposal and
condemn a bad one.
What actually worries my mind is that I
cannot easily tell if Emmanuel loves me as much
as he professes to.

MARIA:

JOE:

How many times do you expect to hear from
me now the ynungman talks of you? He makes
poems in adoration of your beauty which he
maintains excels every other. You may not need
a devil to tell you this. If there are more gentlemen on whom I rely, my master is a top class.
I t is however, very puzzling to observe that
he has such a very deep love for you. This is
very much unlike him in his dealings with
women. Suffice it then to say that the moment
you cut off from this sincere request made by
my master, my face, you will no longer see
me in this house. F0.r me t o be in love with
you and at variance with him, is one of the
things that T consider most impraciicable in
this life. Rather I shall be a very proud and
happy person to have you in the house as my
master's only mistress. Just now I cannot but
b ~ dyou adieu!

MARIA:

Stay for a

while Joe!

JOE: There might be no need for

that. The longer
I keep here the more embarrased I become. If
you really loved me as you claim, you could
at least grant my request.

�My mind is getting soft. 1 cannot give any
rcply right now. I must have to see your master
and discuss with him facr to face.

MARIV:

Well done: If you are in terms with one.
the rest will repay you in such coins. I do not
believe in ingratitude. I like fine .things and
beautiful women. I shall be more grateful, when
those whom I like realise the fact and then fulfil my dedres. You are not a babe. The time
has come foi. you to apply your discretion in
every matter. Even if your heart be as strong as
stone, there is every reason to keep it a bit
subtle, for you to be attached to a person of
sound reputation who will cater for you in all
aspects, is better than to be attached to a
wretch who may be good at the onset and prove
a regret in the end.

DAVID:

JOE:

I now leave you to your conscience.

DAVID:

Good bye!

MARIA:

Thank you!
(David and Joe Leavz)

Upon seeing a page like. Joe, it may be
thought that he is just a poor innocent fellow.
But his words today proved to me that he does
not seem as small as I think him to be. His
friend s.eems to be more advanczd in love affairs.
Perhaps. he is aware of my intentions.

MARIA:

-

Men are never small. It will be highly
misleading to deem any of them so. But what
.are the contents of the letter?

~ERESA:

�(Reading the lcrter aloud) "My dear Maria
It is indeed a pity that you have chosen to torment
a heart that loves you very dearly in this way. If
I am allowed to confess, I must say that I am
not a love-crazy stooge to another. Your beauty
really bebitched me and your manners are so
elegant that I cannot afford more than to have you
nearer me. If you might have found me wanting
in any, form of personal charm, implore thee
forgive and only grant my humble request of your
accepting me as a lover.

MARIA

I know very well that you might not deem it
all that degrading when I make you realise that
neither nor even Lucifrr himself shall take sides
with you for keeping me at arms lenght where
any mishap eventually b~fallsme for failing in this
well determined attempt of mine. You m~ghtftel
that I am worrying you very much, But I cannot
help it, since it is a pressing need. Never on earth
h2d I recieved a similar torture. No! not even in
the business field. If I might be deemed behind
in fashion, I must assure you that above that, I
am a gentlcrnan. Shylock would like to cry at this
hard heartedness of yours, Lady Macbeth wo~ild
feel that this treatment of my person is rather
wicked. Ebenezer Scrooge himself would also prefer
your spending more than one hundred pounds to
get this offer from me. Like every other good lovers,
I shall be quite ready to do your wish 3s much
as is withie my own capacity.
Please take me serious! Consult any of your good
,
friends over the issue! You m ~ g h thave been misled to think that I am only pretending when I
am really not.

�Finally, I hereby wish to make it clear to you that
t h ~ swill be my last letter to you relating the issue.
Althoxgh I am not in a rage, yet I have the honour
to say that %hereit is still very much against your
wish to accept me-adieu! But even if I get another,
I pray that ordinary connections between us not
be servered, since my interest in you' is still strong
and ever will be. Keep fit Emmanuel."
THERESA TOme, it appears that the youngman is serious.
MARIA what then is your suggestion, Theresa?
THERESA Just now that it is burning in him I
suggest that you accept him as a lover. Such
a p t r s w will make an ideal husbmd. The wardings of his letter Portray him as a gentleman.
MARIA: I understand, he really is,
THERESA The earlier you met him in pzrson, the
b-tter.
MARIA

Thank you that I shall d o now!
(Theresa goes away. Maria sets out for
Emmanuel.

A C T 2 SCENE ONE
THE CONFESSION
I am sure that we had actudly tried to
boast up the prestige of Emmanuel before Maria.
Joe: I have no doubt that she was interested in
our conversation with her. At this juncture David,
I must have to thank you very. much for your
activities there. Really, you spoke as if you
had been very much advanced in the affairs
of men and women.
DAVID:

�1 wish my mister were there to hear you urge

Maria to accept him as a lover. If there is
snccess in our vetiture, I owe it much to you.
mvm: In fiiirncss of it all Joe, I have had a good
experience oT love affairs. 1 had played it and
still determine to plry it becaus:: it is a pleasure
to do so.
JOE:

I have got some good savings this time and
will like,to invite you to any girl, before whom
I shall appza: as a ' suitor.
But is it your wish that both of us shall
remain to love ourselves for long?

DAVID:

m
Joe: We had actually done everything that c
be possible between two male friends. It is not
all that essy to do more if not, we could have.
DAVID.'

JOE

Where it all.turns into a miracle?

We have it then. But no other type of miride
can be easy. Tn life or in death David, I shall
rind it very dificult t o forget you.
: I always have. a very deep !ove Joe. when
I mean to. Your own might not be as much.
At any rate, life sccms to be a trial and men
and women, all live by experiences.

DAVID

JOB

: Yes, an exact type of experience that I have
had in this house. Emmanuel has helped me
in many ways. He has even found me an employment which coupled with serving him, affords
me a comfortable living. David I know by all
means that bo:h of us arc of the same age
group.

�DAVID:

JOE:

(Smiling) I believe so.

One thing about you worries me a bit. Any
body ~eeing
you in a lady's atire will a t once
mistake you for a member of the opposite sex.
Even in manners you look romantic. In constitution, you also look effeminate.
Yes, That is my way, while dealing with
very intmate friends. But, for the second dme,
I will like to know from you, do we really
have any true love existing between both of
UP or it is just a mere flattery?
The question is bnffling indeed. For my part,
I have nothin: to subtract from our already
existing love.

DAYID:

Please d o not be suprised anymore at my
repeated question in this respect. Tomorrow
might Drove to be another thing hence for the
purposes of certainty, I wish to get the
assurance.

DAVID:

People may quarrel and forget. We are all human
beings, with various temperaments. Our only
guide ought to be that when you find me
offending, please call me back to order amicably.
This is always a very simple way of avoiding
quarrls between two intimate friends. Even
though I have declared my intentions to marry,
yet, that will not - in any form interrupt our
friendship.
DAVID: Yes Joe, I know that none of us is a girl.
But intimacy, a very deep one too, could compel
us do anything. Take this ring which I have
removed from my finger as a taken of remembrance.

JOE:

�ACT 2 SCENE TWO
THE MEETING
This lady they call Maria is giving me a
very tough moment. According to the replies I
got from her through Joe it sinlply appear that
she does not want to see me at all. But why ?
If I am very ugly, what of the mummies who
still win the admiration of very beautiful women?
If I am uncivilised, then I could have been given
cold shoulders by the highly civilised company
that I keep. Perhaps the minor deceives me.
But then I am not deformed. Although I cannot
boast of perfection in anything yet I can only
realise the fact that I am not very far behind
when compared with other youths of my own
age. As much as I can observe my morals are
not base and I am confident of that. For some
days now I have not eaten anything. Why?
Simply because a lady has not agreed to have
me as a friend. This is foolishness. I am only
very sorry for Maria, If she had but knonn
my intentions she could not have behaved thus.
For the sake of getting her come into amicable
terms with me I belittled myself. Now, I should
look for her no more!

EMMAN:

I should only bear the disappointment that I had,
bravery.

If

Maria

is

very

beautiful,

�there are more. beautiful ladies. I shall take
heart. I am confident of the fact that if I
had not seen her, I could have met another,
let her go ! This bluff is getting to be very
much I can brook it no longer I must keep
myself happy.

(ENTER MARIA)
EMMAN:

What! Are you here?

Yes my dear!
EMMAN: I wonder what might have brought you
to this house today.
MARIA: Perhaps you were not sincere in your' appeal.
EMMAN:
This is where you might have got me
wrong I do not intend to kill myself before
you make sure that I love you. A few minutes
ago, I was only resolving to look for another
since all possible attempts to secure your love
seemed to have failed. You will surely see with
.
m e that 1 had tried' a great deal to- make you
realise my love on you. It, does not seem very
safe to dispatch a page to a lady together with
whom a man would like to be live eternally.
But I did it simply to please you. Upon all
such contemptious attempts, I could not b e
favoured. Thanks be to Providence that you
are now here. It is therefore your own turn to
'express your views, since I have determined to
worship a lady no more.
MARIA: Your speech frets me. 1did not suspect that
the reception could have taken this very shape.
Really speaking I do not hate you. Apart from
the things 'you had told. me, I have heard good
reports of .you.
MARIA:

19

�Yes! I wish my speech could fret you the
more.. Infact, I am determined to be on more
drastic basis.
MARIA: But what if I do not allow you get up
to that extect ?
EMMAN: In what other way, can I be.a stranger to
your humiliating treatment of my person ?
MARIA:
Perhaps yon are hurt in your feelings. But
p-rmit me to say, that I did not really mean
to keep you so.
EMMAN: I have read of people, who remained as
bachelors until they died. It made no type of
difference in their fame. No wonder, there
are misogynists. But yet they survive and feel
happy too. If I happen to miss a lady's love,
what have I lost ?

EMMAN:

This is rather strange! are you quite sure
that with your own hands, you wrote those
letters to me asking for my love.? Can I believe
your 'boy's story of your desire to have me as
a friend or was it just a fiction?
EMMAN: I wrote tho letters to you and I sent my boy
to your house to make the request on my behalf.

MARIA:

MIA:

What devil then might have triod to counterfeit
the love crazy spirit in you.
Much suffering over something keeps a person
hard-hearted. You will bc wrong to blame me
when instead of romantic words I began the
reception of you with words of sorrow and
regret. I am of the opinion, that man should
control and not allow himself controlled by a
desire.

EMMAN:

�MARIA:

Can we forget the past and face the new?

( pausing for a while ) This will be s~bject
to your being serious over what you mean.
For my part, I had determined to have you and
keep you as comfortable.as I can. You were
only wasting time. But I shall be quite prepared
to throw back the rage in which 1 had been
and then if our plans work well, we tell of
the early psrt of this meeting in stories by the
fireside on cold nights.

EMMAN:

'

MARIA:

That is indeed whzt I want.

But Maria, your torture of me has been an
unprecedeated one in the anals of the history of
suitorst I even undertook some fast because
ofit. Just at the verge of taking a strong decision,
you entered into this room. But if l'do not really
love you, why should I persist in having you.
Love is a type of a magnetic force which when
it draws up cannot easily be cast .away.

EMMAN:

It is for thie sake, that I' have turned to be
a beggar to a lady whom I thought would sel
with me and be greatful in lerting my wishes
be satisfied.

I have every hope that you aifl not think
me ungreateful. If you do, then it is a mistake.
Men are difficult to understand and they are
never on the loosing side when the game of
love is played, I ' a m but a lady, a n ordinary
feeble creature liked because of my present
appearance. Peradventure I becpme spilt, then
it all means that I have got to be as

MARIA:

�helpless as a skiking stone; I do not take it
that I have given you a c a m for a perpetual dislike of my person. I only feel that for the
purposes of security, it ought to be necesary to
get a fimi assurance from . a suitor and that
should be conducted 'in a Kay not different from
the. one I did.
You are not ugly. You are not deformed.
Your morals have been testified of by many people
as eiamplary. I am even jealous of you. But
how would you think it ~easonablc 'for a lady
who wishes to exercise a lasting love on you to
jump out and openly declare :so at once? True
it is, that pkace comes.'after war.
I can see here that you had spoken at length
and of course not without bitterness. If you really
mean to have' me, the gates of success are wide
open. This I declare in' order
to swerve
your mind away from the misconceived idea of'
me which seems to be infesting your mind, even
at the moment. You might have understood my
speech. It is not always possible, for ladies to
men and gi5e themselves out to them. This might
tantamount to cheapness and then the end is
always fracas, .discontent and separation, a forced
but quick one too.
If I had no deep love on you I could not
have allowed you to me so.
Deep love on me and I have a deep love
EMMAN:
on you too. What then is the object of any
form of disagreement ? . I am of the opinion
that your former speech is from the bottom
of your heart and so, I shall be a
brute if I keep on prolonging the past.
MARIA:.
I had earlier, requested that of you.
But where you still stick fast to your angep
,

22

�well it then, me-an*.
that I cannot do any other
thing than to registcr it in my memory, that
a man bas miguidedly disappointed a lady who
loves him very dearly.
For your confession - Maria, 1 am
interested in informing you that I am not at
all offended. I was only. trying your sincerity.
Towards this, I feel that both of us might have
agree in plan. If I have caused any. inconvenience, please pardon me. For 'it is after
storm that the gentle breeze comes. Oh! for
a hundred beauties Maria, I shall not have
another if you once promise me true love, then
I shall waste no time in sending for a priest
to have us united. I am not out for any
monkey love. I am direct in my dealings. and
will always pray to God . that you be so too.
Thus, peace and joy shall dispel all disp~rities.

EMMAN:

Much talkink and little deeds might be
of no significant importance. If you were to
enter my mind then nobody could have told
you how much I love you.

MARIA:

It means then that none of us is
mistaken to have come near each other. Let
us now seal this blessed proposal with that
sign that two great h e r s often show.

EMMAN:

I shall waste no time in obeying you my
dear and my real husband to be.

MARIA:

( They Kiss first and look at thems?lves eye to eye and
kiss again.)

23

�ThiS
AMAN:

gesture has - convinced me of our,
love. Your' willingness to have this with me
means much. But Maria, your gentility makes
mc - lovj you the more. Your facial. charm
seems to bewitch me the more at every moment.
Your shape is yet one of .the most ' attractive, thlngs in you tbat will, make other
youngmen to jealaus me for securlng your hand.
YOU are no .iess. Your physi0gti6~ is
MARIA:
not only' balanced but depfcts a lot of nobility.
. .
EMMAN:
Talk no more my own angel of 'light:
Our marriage is fixed ' against fen o~clock tomorrow morning. ( They kiss again )MARIA:
i h a l l go away, prepare'ind come back.
Thank you my sweet ..heart. ( Maria goes
EMMAN:
while Emmanuel escourts her for a short distances ) and comes back.

ACT 3 THE ENDOF
A LOVE'JOURNEY
JOE:

Ro&amp; what I iave .heard' this afternoon
'in this town, I can guess. that my master might'
.have succeeded in winning the love of Maria.
However I shall not conclude just now. I must.
have. to wait until my. master confirms it. But
it is true and I wish if my only friend Dacid
were here. .We eould have discussed at length
since my master will no longer be an unhappy
man. Very good ! Yes !. my master will now
give m e a good .reward according to his
promise. If it is cash, I must divide it into
two equal parts. ,so that David. who contrri-. .
~

24

�buted nwch towards the success of 'the ventnre,
will have one half
( ENTER HELEN )

Welcome my dear lady ! How are you ?
HELEN:
Not very bad please . thank you. 1 am
Helen, a sister to David, are you his friends
Joe ?
JOB:
I am Joe. When is your brother coming
here ? 1 want him earliest !
HELEN.
i t was .on his instruction that I come
here.
JOE:
That is very good of you. Both of you
have the same resemblancr. Tnfact, were it not
that you are clad in the attire of a lady, I
could have wasted no time in calling you
David.
HELEN:
At any rate I hopa that if you d o not
sce him in time, you may like to have me as
.a substitute.
JOB:
By a11 m a n s f m x t exerciss the same
deep-ro~ted friendship existing between David
and I 'on .any of . his relatives.
Thank you very much !
HELEN:
But you laugh, (alk and look like him too ?
~OE:
Yes ! It is thz characteristic of our fdmily.
HELEN:
~ o a Th?t.is
:
gpod indeed.
HeLEN :
YOU, being n male and I female, shall
we not be tempted at times?
JOB :
God fcrbid ! Except my friend David
approves of it. But I might find it difficult to
yield t o such a temptation in the inrerest of
our unrivalled love.

;cry

�Kindly surppress your emotions ! David
y o u friend.
Did what ? Is he no longer your brother ?
JOE:
HELEN:
Please listen.
JOE:
Yes ! I am anxious to know, whenever
that name is mention, I am always very eager
to hear ,everything without delay.
David in short, is my brother as I told
HELEN:
you. Having been instructed earlier. I complied
and hence I am here now. Rcally he is dead
and buried.
JOE:
Perhaps I did not understand you well.
Do you mean date, debt and borrow?
HELEN:
(Bringing out a letter) . Take ihis and
read for yourself. Pirhaps it will explain the
issue more.
HELEN:

(ENTER EMMANUEL)
JOE:

(Taking the letter and opening it, reads)
"My dear Joe, I thought it a great deal of
injustice to est away from this world without
dropping a few lines for you. On my death bed,
I managed to ovcrpower the pangs of death
and then compile this to bid ycu goodbye,
Herewitb my sister Helen. You quite remember
how intimate both of us had been. Please,
for tho purposes of consolation, you may have
her near you. But where this is not to your
help
taste let not my. letter. I cannot
it. This i s the uneptcted bitter end of mine
and I must go. Please great your master and
make it a point to help him get tired up to
Maria. I could have done more as you know

26

�but the ineritable has now served as a barrier.
Lament for me not very much, for I have gone
to pay the sure price mankid. yours affectionately
David". (Joe bursts into tears) Can this be true ?
Yes, it is indeed. 0 ! confusion, why now?

0 Death ! have you come again ? You have
snatched my parents from me and that was during
my tender age, why have you come now to keep
me friendless? David my own trust worthy companion who ka'rure prominently in Maria's residence
during our last visit! He so praised my master
as if both of them had once lived together ! He
so spoke to Maria a bout my masters' dignity
that the lady was trembling for having tri:d
to
11 use the mau ! Cold hands of wicked death !
'1
The abstract agent of destruction ! You have
wronged me. Why not take me too to that land
instead of keeping me socially stranded ? O! David!
David. How can I get another like you? O! my
confidential, handsome and far sighted David!
Only some days ago, we were cracking jokes over
the solidarity of our affection and I did not know
that death the idiot, would overlook every other
person and steal the youth away.
'

Afterwards, life is a slow process of death.

It is only like the shadow of a well dressed man
or woman which only vanishes as he or she leaves
the mirror; T must mourn thy loss my only friend;
1 am even shocked at this. I came into this
place with the happy news of m y vedding with
Maria at ten o'clock this morning. I did not know
that one of the agents who contributed greatly
towards the project has now been snatched away
by death. Rend your heart no more. God before
things will soon assume a good shape.

EMMAN:

�I have corn.: to reward you for your faithful
services to me. S o u will be free ,from me as from
today. I shall marry for you. Towards that, if Helen
will like to be together with us in this' house, the
better. This will enable us to take heart whznever
we think of David. Ycu and your wife, will live
in this house with me and even though you are
employed somewhere, yet, I shall maintain both 3f
you for one year. I shall also be after your
interest.
(Handing over t o him) Take this bank cheque
of one hundred pounds which you are privilleged t o
use any how you like.
JOE:

Thank very much Sir, I a m - now a confused
man betwean joy and sorrow.

In view of the fact t h a t Joe an3 my late
brother David were very frieadly, I d o not
hesitate t o accept the offer which Enmanuel
the owner of this house has made. 1 will
like t o live with you and be a part and parcel
of my brother's friend.
JOE: Thank you Helen. I see with you and will
neither add nor subtract from what you had
already said. Take me as your brother while
I substitute you for him.
HELEN:

I am now going for the priest who will
tie us in holy wedlock. (He leaves)

EMMAN:
HELEN:

JOE:

Are gcu really in deep love ~ i t h David.

Even if I-had the dagger at my neck
saying yes, I must say it!

HELEN:

Where is that ring ?

28

for

�JOB:

Here i t is. (Showing it to her.) Who told
you of it, was it David ?

HELEN:
JOE:

HOW? Are you ~ a b i d
?

HELEN:
JOE:

NO! I really gave i t to. you,!

By all means, I am.

Such a deceit might add more to my sorrow!

0 ! poor Joe! David is a man. Helen is a lady.
How t h m can ?his miracle b e ? Perhaps you
are not serious! Surely, you want to taste me.

I am serious if you please. Now suppress
your surprise and listen carefully. I am David
your friend. This is my real face. Really, David
is a feigned name under which I began to
go after the death of my mother who mas the
last to die, my father having died when I was
only five. No brother and no sister. As a poor
orphan, I did not want men to worry me about.
Hence I clad myself in the attire of men, served
m y first master who made no trace of the trick.

HELEN:

(ENTER

MARTA)

The man in whose house I am living now
appears to have adopted me somehow. He
too is quite igoorant of tbe whole affair. You
wete also in the same soup. I love you and
if you still remember last time, I demanded
t o know from you if you loved me as much.
I decided to try you and so did all that you
might have experienced today.

�JOE:

(Embracing her and looking straight into
her eyes) You are quite correct my dear!
(Looking 'at her again and then kissing her
once.) Former. bitterness is now changed into
sweetness infact, an everlasting one. O! how
deceitful is this life ? My sorrow, is now changed
into joy. How glad ! At any rate in remembrance, of the whole issue, I shall not call you
Helen but D. which is the beginning letter od
David.

HELEN:

With all pleasurz Joe; (They kiss again)

(ENTER EMMANUEL .AND'THE PRIEST)

I have no doubt that both of you will make
the second couple in today's engagement.

MARIA:
JOE:

That is very sure. I am now a married man
and above all, no longer a page.
That is so. Now three hearty cheers for
Joe's Freedcm.
Hip ! Hip ! Hip!

EMMAN:

Hurrah!
EMMAN: Hip ! Hip! Hip !
ALL: H u r r a h !
EMMAN: Hip ! Hip ! Hip !
ALL: H u r r a h ! (All of them clap and stand)
PRIEST: Marriage is a means whereby a man and
a woman are both united o n . earth in the
visible form and also in spirit. When some
.people ar: thus tied together, they cannot
ALL:

�be separated even in heaven above .because
it is a command by, God. .Husbands, love
your wives. In return, wives respect. your husbands. Now unto God the ' father Almighty, I
dedicate Emmanuel and Maria who have today
become husband and wife and also Joe and
Helen who have bccomc husband and wife too.
May the blessing of God dwell abundantly upon
you ferever and ever !
ALL: A m e n !
'

" Then they unite tor life marriage and death
will only depart them."

EXTRA LOVE DEALERS
.As a matter of fact, some women think that
men are entirely stupid. Below is .given . an
extract of a letter written by a spinster to
one of her friends:My dear Julia,
It is one of the most v onderful things that
I had ever come across.. Since ' my arrival
from home to this place, I have actaully not
found things as difficult as I had expected.
Men in fact e\en those of my father's age
scramble for me and keep on spending tkeir
hard-earned money for the purpose that will
not in any form benefit them. In some cases,
they even fight to have. me. I might go ' to
b? the mediator. But more often than not,
they refuse my appeals. When I discovered
that it was only a way .of making the whole

�situation worse, I stopped to pacify. them and
simply left them to their foolishness. You might
even be surprise to hear that not all of 'th-m
are bachelors. In the night, I would keep on aondering how responsible they are. Truly some of
them are wageearners whilz other arz wha! we in our
local language cdl 'big men'.
The latter comes in their cars and simply say,
Lady get into the car"., Really, no price will be
fixed. Well, it would o ~ l vbe a qustion of taking
the lady to one hotel. There the bill for a stay
will be. defrayed. But in the end, the compensation
must be given to the lady. Of course, in such cases,
nothing like thank you is said tq them. Rather
than the men will be pleased and return thanks.
"

As a matter of fact, when I came newly, I
alnays had to receive any amount given to me.
But now, I have learnt to express my feelings,
where the money is n3t something sufficiently
enough. Even though this is the situation, ye: I
must assure you that the part is not all that easy.
Some of them who came are ruffians. The gentle
ones do not worry at all. They feel that neither
fighting nor no disgrace would solve problem. It
is for this sake that I have been teld to charge
them highly.
That of course, I have been doing. You might
be pleased to hear that I have now got one family
iron bed a thing 1 did not at first think if possessing.
In those days, I thought that any person who had
one, was one of the richest. My trunk box is
something sizeable and lovely.

32

�. -Indeed; it is :one .of.:the..:most.. cUt..staading in
the .whole of.. our town.,: Again; I .am.: now. well.
knoivn . a i d hany of the ..young inen'. struggle.
.to.have me. Th: township is quite a good place I
eat any time that I'like and of coarse, you. may
not dare comparz my. food with what whom
we take as the richest msn ie our home town
takes.

SO you see that the excessive libertjr that I
enjoy, here is something epviable. I do -not even
car to get married to any man again. For he
cannot satisfy .,me as much. as I am a t the present:
Jiving. I am only very sorry, that you are .suffering'
at hbme. I have nowgot some-goldand you quite
realize that your husband might not be able to
buy that for you. In fact, my shoes now, number
twelve in pairs. You may even have to unylerstarid
that I no . longer. deal with inferior things. I only
did that in those days when there was no.money
O! I remember, of course, you need not be remainded how both of us suffered together. When
I think of those bad old days and compare them
with the present, I simply glorify God for his
mercy towards me.

X can 'only .suggest that you abaudon your'
husbaod,and come to .this earthly paradise where
tbings are most enjoyable. ,You will be surely enriched by men. You will be happy and at . the
same tim'e free from the molestation of the man
who calls himself your husband. Keep fit,
Yours Sincerely,
Arit James.

�.Julia. had actl~ally lived ,with .her. husband
for a period not belon three-years. The man hin.self was Etim. He did all he could' to keep the
will quite comfortable. At any rate wh'en a man
and a woman live together in' one room, there
might be some type of misunderstan3ing a t times.
But the young man tried very much to prevent
any open quarrel1 that might come up.
People mostly praised him for his mild temper
and cool-head. In all dealings with his wife, he was
very gentle and sincere. He was indeed the type
th.it considered it worthwhile to desist from hating
a wife simply because she had not l e t got any
issue. Even when Julia had no child, Etim kept on
managing things in that way. When he .could no
longer hope to endure the troubles constantly given
by his wife, he simply approached Emmanuel for
some pieces of zdvice. That of course he thought
would help him tide over the entire difficult situalion
and then just as Emmanuel sat down one bright
afternoon, Etim entered. .
EMMANUEL:
UP)
ETIM:

You arc welcome my dear! (standing

Yes thank you.

Please sit down. I have no doubt that.
you will be pleased to .explain to me more
about your family. But where it does nct
conform with your own' principles, then you
might simply have to pardon me.

EMMANUEL:

�EMMANUEL: In any case, I am

opined that you
as an experienced man, can agree with me
that one of the problems facing men is the
one of relationship with women. This is
partieularly so when speaking about house
wives. You seem to look somehow worried
in mind. Perhaps, I cdn guess your trouble a
bit.
Oh dear! If you would not mind it, I shall
be prepared to call you a
soothsayer.
You have actually mentioned the root cause
of my distress. It is for that, I have come
to you for the purpose of obtaining
some advive. I always jealms people who live
happily with their wives. For my part, I can
only say that I am very unfortunate to have
gat a type of woman that would bend upon
kezping me in uttermost discomfort. She associates very much wlth free women and even
though she is given full liberty in this house
yet, she does not appear to have realised my
kindness. I am even thinking of committing
suicide because of this wicked woman.

ETIM:

(ENTER JULIA)
I suspect that you might have understood
that your husband is here. I am really very
pleased to get you here. Your husband seems
to have been somehow offended over your
actions towards him. In fact, the earlier you

ETIM:

�make a change the better &lt;I hope it will be.
-I.am'.sure that if both of you remain in
peace, there wdl not be much to worry for.

Thank you Sir. Truly, I have decided not
to worry in the house' any more. Just of
recent, I received a letter from one of the ladies
who was at first in this town. She is vary
much desirous cf haviug me outside as a
free-woman. She explained to m$ that there
is a lot of money to be realised. Pleas'ure she
maintains is abundant.

JULIA:

DO not worry. Thess things must pass
away but .love shall not cease until such a
time that the inevitable end of mankind will
have to step in.

EMMAN:

In any case, God forbid that,. death
should come at this time. Let us live and
hope for future progress and betterment. Dismiss trouble, for it is bad. Stay in love and
peace and comfort, will have to be in your
room. Happiness will also enter and of course,
you realise that it is a great gift. I shall not
tell you that I do not querrel uith my wife.
But we always settle things in a very amicable
form. 'It is in that way we easily prevent people
from mocking or laughing at us.

EMMANUEL:

�JULIA: I have actually heard and understood you.
I shall no longer make a mistake of getting
to be in dispute with my husband. I shall
be prepared to accept him as my brother and
then keep things going.

I am also grateful at this. I trust that by
the graGe of God, I shall be the last person to
cause any rift within the family circle. I now
say pos~tivelythat P shall kezp her happier
since she has with her whole mind decided
to be in pzace with me: I really love peace
and hate pieces, You have lived for long, with
your own wife and people envy both of yau.
If I can onlv live like that, I *am sure that
my days will be longer even when I am not
God who ought to decide.

ETIM:

Let all things be so. I have heard
your'assurances. When mistakes do not come
up in love affairs, it is not all that easy to
effect true love. Let us hope tbat God will
seal up all that we might have said here. What I
like in my life is to say something and mean
it. If you d o so, there might not seem to be
any type of misunderstanding which you will
not be able to suppress. Men and women

EMMANUEL:

�always like la tnlk. But you should not be
wor.cd.
Keep cool all the lime and io thr
en4 you will come l o a a l i w that i t is mare
folly l o keep oo quarrelling sod creating confuadon hrrc an" there.

m w : Much talking might not go to help us. We
shall onlytry lo we i f wc can live up l o
expmation. O m moa, I
ray, thank you. Good
hye m" dear ymngman.

I hall not look h e n or l h s c for any
advim again. The bad and lcccirfvl lrllsr that
I got will not fake me away from the right
path. Good byc Sir.

,"Em

The E d

TEE WISE SAYINGS
A rtranar with hrtrer attitude en,ertains the host.
Onc docs nor need any light i n the dark to rrcopnise
hi* frirnd.

Two husband do not reject thefood prepamd by n

goad smiiing woman.
One nn't see wcll i n the battle using mirror on her
eye oat a Lime.
Hiddcn words should never be told to ths talkerrivea.
I f your hrolhcr'r purse catcher fire, wet youo
immedialdy.
No matter how tall you am, your shadow will atways
noc he met while irackiog.

�Wcsllb o f f e d fa a fool ia like water fillcdia
a lcakio bucket.
The birds take lhrmrelves as land awoers, yet
fear the farmcrr.
A haPw expiprcuion inspirer confideoa.,
We klmow ,those that wc lovc bur thore who lovc
"a we Loow rare.
Tho csltlc informs ita o w n that it is ready.
How juvenile EIOYS PO d m his inteligeam.
A good wife does thing8 accbrding to the husband's
cammand.
People 11auelling with Ihcir encmy, must understand
that they arc rravelliqg alone.
A thief has no stamp on his ram.
A l l that you have to enjoy are all that you have
81

prescn,.

DiRculBcs can be realis. by trying.
Nothing Wid with tho mouth ,bat ir m e t .
me wisc does not go to functions to f e d !hemselves but for understandings.
The h u n m man r e m c m k n aU the food be
r u s t e d when he i r hungry.
I f )on hope on your parmta you will die poorly
created.
Hs who hasgooe to k i c o will s s j much of it.
sew m
,
i
went 10 ~ h cmarket with shrcla
on his clothes.
The wlf aduiwr term the b e instead of me hooey.
r n e d a r not know the +vcl i l l n r u o f another.
The vulrum islhe indicator of dead s n i m s b
The fling bird dcfeslr the long ,,oatred human.
N o t all !he lcavcr i o the bush are eatable

mc

39

�He who kncws how a rogue breaks the door is
a rogue himself.
The good words in the jungle and its sufferings
are tqual.
How old a woman is, she is bearing sweetness to her
husband.
The goat will orver trace thz way of the hyene.
The grave of a wlk lies where she married.
To give to the new born is to provide for the old age.
The appearance of the brave is an evidence of what
he is.
A person has the cock but public have the crow.
Where the Juvenile points while crying there you
will find thy father or mother.
He who sleeps under trees does not mind the leaves
A town may be far but there is another behind it.
Never trust a person who does not mind his business.
Wealth is not his that has it but he that enjoys it.
The one cutting a path in the bush does not
realise how crooked it may be

He who suffers from yaws watches where he places
himself

The fowl dances happily at the function the hawk
has not attended.
If you dance while every music on, you will soon
be lame in both legs.

��1

Intmrting Nm1s and Advisable Novels in rtwk.
Eaough d i i u n t wl ba made in the price on quaotitj ordered, *
il

I

i

.
..

;'?P/
. ;I'...
'.'$

The African Youths Guide 3s. dozen 12s
A Guide to mmiagc 2 6d. dozts 12s.
s
Beam of women 28 6d. doun ga
Braotifu) Abrmm in Crazy love Is 6il doma IOs
Drunkard$ bClisws .barrrs Heaven 1s 6d dozen 9s
Hew to su*
in life 3 . ,dozen. 13s
8
M tf j : &amp; act of true IoYe 2s dd, dozen 17s
uiu $ in the
*
Naw to apoverty 1s 6s dozen 12s
H &amp; I Ibo, Y m b a d English m@e easy 2s. dozen 128
~
Man 'spffbm is 6d. dozen gs
ha'R3ogct 2s6d dozen I&amp;,
Iia in the romance of,&amp;$iny 2s 6d. down @s
M i i &amp;tarfort's heart cries for T&amp;b.g66, dome 1%
o'0;
I8

. NigeriainBeohelors Guide 28 2s, d*
66,
?Iknq .b1ooming beauty

z,@&amp;
,cif

;lOs

'

love 2s 6d, dozen Ha
ur pf man b 6d, dozen 9
Thc,.,W
birtbry of Zik ZI, doze3 15s
w.M is hard Is 3 4 dozea gs
?Be q&amp;ror of life is 6d, d6zm 12s
T e lif6.i~ prison yard is 6 d dozen 8s
h
the
Two
ie the romance of m%vay Iovtr 1s 6d. d p lk
w
Whrt w w ace thinkingabout men.(No. lbomb to wnmol)'1$ 6tl
dozen IOs
.Wbp mcd never trust women 2s 6d, dozen 13s
Roamnary and the taxi driver 2s dozen 121
Sllfurday Bight disappointment 2s dozen 12s
Zk la @C battle of freedom 2% dozen 14s
i
Lwe s h d mva d 3 dozen Us
,
The86 are few of the nowls
have in stock and ~lrqmise
ta add more in future.
&amp;large your vocab by reading novels. Send your qflcn
todr forquiclr &amp;livery. AU orders are posted f m . 1 qJ&amp; p
p
all yid.

m
a
p

J

-

..

Printed by AN Star Printing P m , 62 IIReLa Road; O [ .
n*

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                <text>Felix Stephen advertises this play as a comedy that depicts moral behavior for those in love. He says that it can also be read, and notes that it was written specifically for African readers and actors, (pg. 4). This might suggest a performance history. However, performances would have occurred in schools or in social clubs, since at this time there were no established theatre groups in the region.&amp;nbsp; &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The pamphlet cover has a woodcut of a European couple, perhaps French, in court dress. The play appears to borrow heavily from Cyrano de Bergerac,Shakespeare and from many of the comedy-of-manners plays written in the 18th and 19th century. It is fairly well developed compared to Stephen's other plays in the Onitsha Market Literature Collection such as, &lt;em&gt;How to Play Love&lt;/em&gt;.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The characters include Maria, Theresa, Emmanuel, and the servants David and Joe. David and Joe run love errands for Emmanuel. Maria, who is Emmanuel's love interest, wants to test any future lover for emotional endurance and commitment. Theresa serves as a well-developed foil to Maria. The servants serve double duty as plot developers and analyzers of class issues. In one potential plot twist, Maria suggests that she might accept a love application from Joe rather than his master Emmanuel. &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Maria: &lt;em&gt;If it is from your master, well I must have to suggest to you that there is no need wasting [sic] time. I had on some occasions told you frankly that I do not want him to speak to me on this matter anymore. I repeat that if you would like to come in as suitor that I shall not waste [sic] time to grant, (pg. 10).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;However, this plot twist never develops and is replaced with the classic one of concealed gender identity. Joe is getting ready to embark on his own quest for a marriage partner when he stumbles on David's true identity as Helen. The play ends with Helen and Joe, along with Maria and Emmanuel, getting married in a nearly Shakespearean double wedding. This plot twist is discussed in the essay on drama.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Like much of English comedy, this play relies on plot twists and servants to drive the plot and the humor. The pamphlet ends with a sort of epilogue to the play in which Emmanuel prevents a friend or associate's wife from leaving him for a life of prostitution followed by two pages of wise sayings. This ending suggests that this play was meant for the reader and consumer of pamphlets, by purchasing this play one receives the added value of advice and wise sayings.</text>
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                <text>This Item is protected by copyright and/or related rights. However, for this Item, either (a) no rights-holder(s) have been identified or (b) one or more rights-holder(s) have been identified but none have been located. You are free to use this Item in any way that is permitted by the copyright and related rights legislation that applies to your use.</text>
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                    <text>�3

HOW TO STUDY

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TELEGRAMS, AGREEMENTS,
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BY
WILFRED ONWUKA
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�OBTAINABLE FROM

6 E B 0 BROTHERS
S. 4, No. 11 MAIN MARKET,
ONITSHA.

STUDENTS' OWN BOOKSHO'P
No. 17 BRIGHT STREET,
ONITSHA.

�PREFACE

This text book captioned 'New Grammar Book'
is indeed very interesting to read. My principal aim
in producing the book is to contribute my quota
towards the educational building, progress and development of Nigeria and the world in general. There
is no doubt that a student will achieve a rapid improvement, if he follows the example laid down in
this book.
The book is constructed for senior primary and
students in the secondary schools. It is also useful
to the students in the Teacher's Training Colleges
and other general readers. To be candid, it is a
book for all ages.
WILFRED ONWUKA
(Author, Compositor, Poet
Novelist and Dramatist)
(Master of Pen)

�CONTENTS

What is a letter
How to write ordinary letters
Warning and legal notice
Business letters
Applications
Specimen of an application
Love letters
Composition
Kinds of eassays
Agreements
Telegrams

Part I

Contents verbs
Means of transport
Lessons

To come, to go, 10walk; to run, to ride, etc.
To find, to found
To discover, to invent, to explore
To learn, to find out, to know
To drown, to be drowned, to sink, to float
To be born to die, to be dead
To say, to tell
To hear, to listen to
To catch, to take, to obtain, to receive

41
44
46
48
51
52
55
58

60

�what ji a Tettei?
'A 'letter is a written or printed message from
one to another.

How many kinds of letters have we.

There are five main kinds ol' letters. Name them:
1 Ordinary letter
2 Business letters
3 Application letters
4 Love letters
5 Letters of protest.
How to write ordinary letters
To construct
ordinary letter, one must get one's point ready and
arrange them paragraph by paragraph. For you to
understand what I am saying below is a. typical
example. Here is a letter from a person to his sister
advising her to be careful about what he described
as 'Modern Boys'.
When writing an ordinary letter write your
address at the risht and at end of the letter, sign or
write your name in full.
No. 10 Ukpor Street,
Fegge.Onitsha.
7th November, 1962.
Dear Sister Joan,
To be candid, I would have written to you
since, but owing to the fact that I have so many
commitment, that kept me busy, I was accurately
unable to do so. Indeed, what prompt me most to
lift upmy pen to write this letter is one dangerous
and risky rumour that I have been hearing about
you. The rumour which wasconfirmed by many people
claimed that you are the comforter of 'Modern Boys'.
The rumour further clalmed that .your house over
there has been turned into a complete boarder.
Joan remember that one does good for himself

�,and at-tin:es, . d~ei'for.ihe.:mn . sneself.-4s from
ysur -childhoodi!J have. been i.giving'iyou' this: parti;cula&amp;advice; :but,you do.: not .seem t o . understand
me.' You are fair in so many thing+but you like 'The
Game of Love' most in your life. That is one thing
which is wrong with you. Do not forget 'that it was
the reason whyyou did not marry immediately you'
left the elementary school. You could remember that
a wealthy and well educated )oung man who came
t o narry vou heard of it and :ran. away viithout
turning back, yet you do not care to repent. After
those events. I spent a lot to see thatyou are employed as a school teacher,. so ' t h a t x p u could earn
money. and stop all those ugly things, now the .fair
situation 'is just like a battle tield of armed. forces.
Please, my sis:er if you know that y w will marry
at all in your life, stop 'all those illegal love deal,
hence it ha brought your name to the ,public ridicule.
odium and contempt, 'Beware of modern Boys'. They
have: dangerous plans that .'is always 'capable of
bringinz dangerous results. Ttiose type o f crooks
wouldrnot mind: toy spend heavily in order, to get
somejne. .The,headmaster. of your school also wrote
me sayingthe.sahe.thing which others said and that
made me to believe.
I

'

'

At pesent time I do not intcnd to inform our
father ,about this serious matter, until 1 see that.there
is no change in your character. Try to change because
everything has its own specific times and you will be
tired whea time for that comes.

I should also like to know about your savings.
How much is your money in the bank? I put this
question, to you because 1 learnt that you have so
many / uniforms, golden earrings and costly footwears. Therafore, I am suspecting that you have no rea-

�sonable and fabulous accounts i n the hank. If you
have, pardon me because of my wrong assumption
but, in case you have none, try to have. Next year,
yoo will he going to training, so as to qualify as a
higher elementary teacher, then money will be needed
for that period. Though I am to contribute a lot,
yet, that is no licence for you to suffer from
squandermenia.

Frankly speaking, the day I will see a change in
your character I will be a red letter day in the history
of my life. Watch me, whenever you see me mishehavinp, criticised and correct me as I have just
done. Thanks in advance.
Yours dearest brother,
Rufus Odogho.
Miss Mabel Obi,
Box 18,
Nnewi.
After completing A letter, put it in an envelope
and post it at the Post Office. Do not forget to affix
a 3d stamp and in case of a registered letter which
will be claimed within Nigeria. But if on the other
hand, it happened to be an overseas letters claimable
outside Nigeria, the stamp of one shilling will be
used if such letter is going by sea mail. Subsequently, any overseas registered must bear a stamp of
one shilling and nine pence.

�Remember to draw,,two ,opposi&amp;...pqjnllel ::lints
., .
'both a t t b e back and the face of the e n d o p r , con.
jtaining the'letter. The two lines will form :our angiis,
and each edge will be 900. After registering a icttcr
be sure that you are given a receipt by the post
Office clerk. Do not miss the receipt hence t h ~
\onsequence is obvious.
.Below is an example of registered letter from a
trader to his overseas customer warning him to ship
his goods to him, immediately.
Messrs AS. E. Onwuka &amp; Sons,
No. 90 Moore Street,
Onitsha/Nigeria.
.2nd November, 1964.
Mcssrs Hebu Trading Corporation,
P. 0. Box 4486,
Kober Japan.
Dear Sirs,
R~gistered
Our Order of Toy Pistol No. 24

We are deeply concerned over the. extremely
long delay in the ,shipment our of order of toy pistol
No. 24 of 1964. Asa matter of fact. we see no reason
why you should be delaying theshipment of our order.
You have shipped. those ordered by our competitors to them, while' you know properly that we
booked our own order before.them, you deliberately
refused to ship our goods to us. When we were
booking the order, we wrote and informed you' that
it is a seasonal goods and that after the Christmas
period. none o f ' it could be .sold. Following that,.
you acknowledged the receipt'of the letter and assured us tbat the article should be shipped t o . us to
the middle of November, so that we could be, selling
it . before' the Christmas ' day. None of . these
8

�promises has been fufilled. rhey are rather fake and
base ess. After a long delay i n the shipment of the
ordera we wrote many reminded letters to you asking
you to ship the order to us, but you did not even
care to reply those letters. At present time, others
are selling their articles but ours is no wtere to be
found. You want to push us into a beavy loss.
WARNING &amp; LEGAL NOTICE
Notice is hereby given to you that if you fail to ship
our goods on or before 14th November 1964, a well
democratic and instituted legal court action will br instituted against you. We have handed over all necessary
documents to our solicitor' for close study. You are
playing with our business including yours because, if
you had shipped the order early, we would have
opened another L/C in your favour. Take notr that
we will be claiming the actual cost price of the goods
including the selling profit from you.
We wait to see.
Yours faithfully,
A. E. Onwuka.
for

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-.............".......... ............. ............,.. .... ......
Manager.

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s. 9d.
Messrs Hebu 'Trading Co.,
P. 0.Box 4486,
Kober Japan.
Diagram showing the specimen of an envelope of
a registered letter. This is an oversea letter and it
bears 1/9d stamp. The letter is to go by air mail.

�REPLY.
Messrs Hebe Trading Corporation,
P. 0. Box 4486,
Kober Japan.
Messrs A. E. Owuka &amp; Sons,
No. 1 Moore Street,
OnitshaINigeria.
Dear Sirs,
REGISTERED
With reference to your registered letter to us dated
2nd January 1964, we hereby assure you that yoor
articles and goods have been shipped to you and they
are likely to land at the Port Harcourt Harbour at
about 14th November 1964.
The failure of our machine during the working
period made it impossible for us to comply with the
promise given to you, but now, all is alright. We do
not intend to enter into legal hdttle with you, hence
we know that we are wrong. Please suspend all about
cmrt action because at the circumstances surrounding
the event can be described as an "Act of God" and
nobody is to be blamed.
To assure you that we are frank and candid we
enclose here with
all necessary documents that
would enable you to clear the goods with most easiness.
Yours faithfully,
For, Hebu Trading Corporation
.....................................
.... ...."..Mr. Okey Acha,
Director of Business
? .

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Here' again is an example of an ordinary letter.
It is from a girl to her brother requesting him to
send her school fees. '

�CInitshrGirls' 3choo1,
P. 0. Box 7,
Onitshs.
I st Decen~ber1964,
My dear brother,

I am writing this 'letter with heavy tears in my
eyes and a great sorrow in my lieart. This is. because
I am driven out of our school by our headma;ter
owing to the fact that I have not pqid the school fees.
The amount of scnool fees is (£2) two pounds,
per quarter. He, the headmaster warned me to Fay
my school fces before December 7, 1964 less my
position will be given to another fellow.
Please, my brother kindly send me the school
fees before this given time so tbat I will be re-admitted
in the class. Our final examination is now approaching and all classes are now making an intensive
revisions, over their previous lessons. If I miss this
revision, it all means I hat I will fai! the examination
and repeat Standard Eve next ytar which is uot a
good economic dceisisn.
How about Hope, Ngozi, Chida and Mabel. I
am with all aod every hope that they are well just as
I am over here.
Hoping to hear from you in few days, I wish the
Yours Sisterly,
Joy Obi.
Mr. Emeka Obi,
Box 646,
Onitsha.

�FAVOURABLE REPLY

Box 646,
Onitsha.
5th December 1964

Dear Sister,
I enclose here with ( t 2 : 10s) two pounds ten
shillings Postal Order No .... .. payable to you. Draw
it out and pay the school fees with (£2) two pounds,
use the remaining (IOs) ten shillings as your pocket
money.
Ctudy very hard so that you will catch up. At
any rate, I know that you are very intellipent and
that you must surely succeed. We are all well.
Yours brotherly,
Emeka Obi.
Miss Joy Obi.
0. G. S.,
Onitsha.
Never you leave any stone untouched when ' writing any ordinary letter explain yourself properly and
simply, so that the reader will immediately understand
you. Avoid the use of bombastic words, because by
doing so you make yourself a fool.
BUSINESS LETTERS
Business is one's profession. In doing business
one normally write some letters and those documents
are known as business letters. As we all know, there
are different types or kinds of business.
When drafting business letters, one says simply
and in the most obvious understandable form. Here
is an example o f a business letter.
Mesm Rufus Odogbo Trading Co.,
P. 0.
Box 646,
Onitsha-Nigeria,
6th March, 1964.
12

�Mrssrs Willg d Co.
Trading Corporation,
No, 2, Journey Street,
England.
Dear Sirs,
DIAMOND TOURCH LIGHT
We thank you for your letter dated 22nd February
1964. Weregret to say that the price of 519d which
you quoted as the most competentive price of diamond
tourch light is too dear comparing with the present
market price over here. So consider and ship tbe goods
to us at net price of 2s 9d a dozen.
DIAMOND TOURCH BATTERY :- Subsquently
please give us your samples and most competentive
price of Diamond Tourch Batteries. So that we will
consider and book orders from you. Frankly speaking
we are very anxious to establish goods and reasonable
business relationship with you provided tbat you
would welcome us. As of us. We are not sample
mongers, but true importers and exporters of general
merchandise.

HAND BRAND LAMP: We have today agreed to
your quoted price of £5 10s. (five pounds ten shim
llings.) Again, we have deposited the sum of 565 (sixty
five pounds) with the Bank of West Africa in your
favour, being the amount of PIC.
SHIPPING: Please ship the goods to arrive at the
Port Harcourt wharf between the months of September and October 1964.
PACKING: Park three doxen into one carton, and
four cartons in a wooden case.

�MARKINGS: A t each of the four corners of any of
the case, mark t e word "Lamp &amp; Glass Handle With
Care." We demand this so as to avoid careless handling at the wharf. We also demand that each .tamp
should be wrapped with c tton wool to avoid any
damage to the lamp globe. The initials of our name
"R. 0 T. C." should be marked at the case.
NECESSARY DOCUMENTS: Dispatch all necessary
the
documents cdn'lrected u i ~ h goods to us immtdia.
tely. The documents will he1p.u~ to clear the goods
with easiness cn arrival.
Your immediate attendan e to our orders will be
highly appreciated. We are anxiously waiting lo hear
from you soonest possible. Thanks in advance.
Yours faithfully,
For, Rufus Odogbo Tgadinp Crmpany Ltd.

REPLY

Messrs Willv Trading Co.
:Yo. 2 Jocrney Street,
London.
11th March 1964.
Messrs Rufus Odogbo,
Trading Company Ltd.,
P. 0. Box 646,
Onitsha-Nigeria.
Dear Sirs,
We are in receipt of your letter dated 4th March
1964. And submit that the prices of 2/9d which you
offered to pay in respect of dianond torch lights
is considerably ton low, comparing with our cost of
production. We will be unable to ship the goods to
you at that low rate.

�However, in view of future-business relationship
and transation, we have oonsidered to raduce the
amount to 3s per dozen instead of 5s 9s. Our motto
you to scli it
is "LIVE AND LET LIVE' so we w s ~ t
with prcfit and that is why ' we have made tais
fantasti- reduction.
HAND BRAND L M :
A PWe have s h ip p e d
your order on this item. Secondly, we have complied
with your advice and instructions coocerning shipping,
packing of the goods and marks on the case.
NECESSARY DOCUMENT:We enclose herewith important and relevant documents t h a t
could help you to clear the goods e a d y . We ere
therefore waiting to obtain your favourable reply.
Yours faithfully
S~gned ...... ........
......
blaoager.
for Willy &amp; Co. Trading Co.
A company or a firm is not bound to accept
he price quoted by his custo Tiers. TIk company
has all and every right to offer the price which
she has to pay. When writing business letters try
to difinite the item you wish to order properly
so that your customers will understand you. If you
make a mistake, when quoting article or invoice
number, it could lead to a serious mistake and
such mistakes are capable of bringing fantastic loss
of money, "Beware of overseas crooks"
When doing business, always examine all invoize
or letter sent to you by thcm. Some crookish film
would not mind to qllote an aricle to a customer
and finally ship another thmg to him. If this is
don? by your customers, write :nd register a letter
of protest to tbe cosmercial jepartmeot of oJr
government. informin!: them of the incident and at
the same time, requesting her to help you state your
case before the Government of thq firm concerned.
Try to surrey such goods with a licenced surveyor
7.

�APPLICATIONS
An application is a closed though or attention.
On the other hand it can be described as a request
letter. We have employment applicaticns and
so many other types.
Specimen of an application
Umu-Ana-Edo Electrical Establishment
30A, Iweka Road,
Onitsha--Nigeria.
131h February, 1964.
Rufos Odogbo,
Trading Company,
Box 646,
Onitsha.
Dear Sirs,
1 have the honour to apply to the post of a
sales clerk at the office of your company near
in the
Enugu, having. seen t'l : 4 1I S :n 1
Daily Times Issue of 12th February, 1964. Aged
10 years. I am a holder of R. S. A. Certificate
in more than 10 subjects.
I have served for years under tbe U. A. C.
of Nigeria but owing to the fact that my salary
was not so sufficient, 1 have no alternative than to
resign. I Schooled at the Prince Commercial Onitsha.
I attended a special cause on importing, exporting
business, management, commerce, economics, Arithmetic, Book-keeping and Accountancy.
If my apphcation is considered and approved
I assure you that I would be a valuable and good
asset in your office. Also I promise to be loyal
and obedient towards my senior officers.
Subsequently I will be careful, pain staking and
energetic during the performances of all the duties
assigned to me.
16

�With all and every hope, that you:. will fayour-.
able give m y applicatinn - a-dui- coiiiiirwafion.

The Manager,
R. 0 T. C .
.
4 Oeuta Road,
Onitsha.

I remain,
Yours obediently,
Peter Obi Oowuka.

FAYOURABLE REPLY
Rufus Odogbo Trading Company.
Box 646,
Onitsha
14th February 1964
Pe:er Onwuha,
Um71.Ana. Edo Electrical Establishment
30A Iweka Road,
Onitsha.
Dear Sir,
Your application dated 13th February was received
considered and finally approved. We need your
service as contained in your application provided
that you will always adhere t o our rules, regulations
and ordinances.
Therefore, you are invited to an interview a t
the Manager's office, No. 4 Oguta Road, Onitsha
by 10 a. m. Your are also requested to produce all
materials for writing. including ink and pen when
coming. Take note that if you happen to succeed
in the test to be given to you, salary of (£18: 10s)
eighteen pouods ten shillings is to be paying to you
monthly, but if you damage any of the Company's

17

�propertv

you have to bear such r i s k
Thanks in advance.
Yours fa~thful,
Signed: M. P. Okenwa.
Manager.
for 'Rufus Odogbo Trading Company

OF-' asset,

Here again is snother application from some
m e requesting to be admitted a s 2 member of the
Dynamic Party of Nigeria.
No. 2 Ehi Road,
Aba,
20th Avril 1964.
Tile Secre a r y Gereral,
Dyarnic P ~ r t y Nigeria,
of
dox 388,
Onitsha.
Dear sir,
A application to be admitted as a member of the
n
Dynamic Party of Nigeria.

I, Raphael Onwuka, whose name and signature
appears below desire to be admitted as a member
of the Dynamic Party of Nigeria
Formerly I was a member of Nigeria Peoples,
Party but owing to the f a t that, that Party is
foundalistic and squandamenic, I resigned from it.
If my application is approved and I happen
to be a member, I swear to abide w ~ t hthe rules.
regulations and ordinances governing the Party. 1
will also contribute my quota towards the Liberation of Africa and her Unity.

�1 enclose here with the sum .oi 11. for, the purchase of membersh~pcard and . + n o t h e ~ y u mof (C2)
,
tb.'hejp to
,
$
i
t
pounds hiins 'v6iu"ta'ry..:'.do;i&lt;ti'dh.
increas'e the fund of the' party.
Long live the party. Long live the fatherland.
Yours in comradeship,
Mr. Raphel Onwuka.
FAVCURABLE REPLY

The Secretarv General.
Dynamic paicy .of. ~ i g e r i a
Box 388. 'Onitsha.
23rd April, 1961
Raphel Qnwuka,
2 Ehi Road,
. Aba.
Dear Sir.
'

.

.

,

..

With reference to .your 'appli&amp;ion . dated 20th
April 1963, I h a v e to inform you that you are now
edmitted as a member of theDynamic Party. Subject
to the following conditions:
1 That you should .abide with the rule, regulations
and ordinances of Dynamic 'Party.
2 That you should always abide with the decision
of the.elected central executive committee of the Party

-

3 That you should always .respect the. leader of
the Party aud assist him in 'waging relentles..* war
against bribery, nepotism and sq:~andermenia other
of
. .
Nigeria -Political Parties.
4 That y o u will bz ready to serve' Africa bdth
during the time of peace and, war, and. secondly help
'the. sanie :Africa" to gain her economic freedom.
'

'

�If you know that you will fulfil these conditions, proceed on 28th April, 1964 to fill your
membership card.
I remain,
Yours faithfully,
S. E. Okeke.
Signed
for,
Secretary General of
Dynamic Party of Nigeria.
Long live the party!!
Long live the fatherland!!!
When writing an application, try to
explain your qualication very clearly and at the same
time express what you could be able to .do if your
application is considered and approved. This if done,
.will help the person or firm to whom the application
is being sent to understand the contents and, thereby know where to start and what to reply you.
Important:

LOVE UTTERS

The word ''Love" means fondness, Pre-eminent
kindness benevolence, leverential regard or the object
of affection. Then love letter means a messive letter
or document showing o r containing the above mentioned words, or phrases. When playing the game
of love, the people in the field d o write letters, and
such letters are known as ''Love Letter".
Below is an example o r specimen of a love
letter. The letter is from Esther Onye appealing to
Gabriel Chukus to fall in love with her.

�Holy Rosary. School
-0-nitslia,
17th' February,' 1962:
Dear swcet honey,
Application to be in love with you

I, Esther Onye, whose signature and n a ~ appear
e
below desire to be your lover. Born in the year
1944;I am a student of Holy Rosary School; Onitsha.
At present time. I am in class four..
Yellow in comp'exion, I am bold, beautiful,
attractive and posses pood and reasonable chap. In
1960, I . won th:: contest of Miss Africa beauty
competition. Thus I won Miss Africa in 1660.
. If you agree to be in love with me, I assure
you that I must be comforting you always. Subsequently, I must try to satisfy your requirements and
keep you absolutely happy.. Take note that as a
good lover, I would not like you to give me any. thing or spend on my behalf.rather.1 will be spending
on your behalf. I am anxiogsly ,waiting to hear from
you soonest possible.
Your dearest love.
Esther Onye.
Mr. G. E. Chuks,
Box 6.
REPLY
P. .O. Box 6.
Onitsha
20th 'January, 1962.

Dear Esther,
Your lovely letter dated 17th January 1962
was received with great thanks. It was when I
received your letter that I knew that you have interest in me.

�As of lover a Modern Girl, I bave accepted
your love applicatior~. Even, 1 am ready to spend
on you and if time permits, you will be the mother
of my future children.

Therefore, 1 invite you to come on Monday by
3 o'clock p. m. in my house for the game of lote to
touch all parts nf the body but not to interco~rse
with n y lovrr hence such practice usually result
pregnancy.
Waiting t o see you on the specified date.

I remain
Yours affectionately,
Gabriel Chukus.
Miss Esther Onye.
H . R. S.
Onitsha.

Another love letter is from Paolina Eze, asking her lover
to send her what she described as Christmas Presents.
No. 24 St Jobn's Street
Enugu.
2nd July, 1960.
Dear Rufus,
It seems to me that you have forgotten all
about our love, but devil forbid. I have written at
least four complete letters to you but you did not
care to reply any of them. Have you lost interest
in me. If so, inform me to that effect, so that I will
switch to modern boys who are eager to intercourse
with me.
Please if you really know that o w love is
still shining, send me Christmas presents as the
celebration only remains two weeks. I need carring
cloth and foot wearings. Also, I have no spectacle

�s6-hp&amp;h,i,$.;,w&amp;fiTvtllrenF our
pci?Cf?%.iind &amp;n&amp;' &amp;- ;-41!r'\:chb$s 'f$;v$Y&amp;s .: 1bi ..pr&amp;
defe&amp;lih3'itbee.
re~aj,Gi.ik&amp;i . , .
I.8m .eipkt.$tp:~i
.
:hear. frcim,&amp;+efcsr.; days;
.
w
yd,,? .you i i f epaiilin&amp;
.. .
,Mr. Rufus Obi.
'

,

. ..

W ~ P A BRE~L-V..
~E
P 0 BOX 32,
;

Port' Fiarccurt,
10th .July,,,1960.

Dear, Paidilia;
..
I have seen that what you want is.. to liquidate
me. and see;that m y . pocket is empty ,and. nothing
more..YLiu ,ark not, a;';true li)ver7';'otherwise, ,there is
ncr'ieasdn wRjl..yod sha~ild
'be'.'demanding f r ~ m me
always like that.
. : T Ikfrfrahk a d c a t i d i d , I have.gothing' to .give
'"&amp;
you as Christmas preielice. .If .you d a n t to switch to
modxn boys .,because I did not give you,,money and
Christmas presence, 'do t:iat without delay.
Recgltly, my motheraied, but: you did not care
e
you are
t o sM me message'6'f 'condole~~ck,;,iris'tedd
ask.ing'for Ckristm i s :prese~$e. 'Thi$ shows ,'the: type
of;i?;irl.
you"are.. 'It $ubsequentIy proves': t6 me':what
wb'itld have'4fappend ' tiad 1 ' agreed to have ybu as
my: wife: as.:jrsu.jjrevi.ously wggtsted.
. ; ~ . ~ bwtite~me :;gain. I 'donot usually,:tiefrieud
," i
gijls of. your type.
Yours ,faithfully;
Rufus Obi.
I @ ~ R T A N T : - When.. coqstructing. iove. ..letter .try.. to
say,,,: scy~thing;that ig.to,.-,attract , your :..lover. and,
,.,
perhaps remind him/her of the past events. In case
23

�his relative dies, d o not fail to send him "message
@fcondolence", because this will make him t o understand that you are a true lover. T o demand always
from a lover is bad. Love is equal. Any lover could
spend on behalf of the other whether male or female.
COMPOSITION
Composition is a way or channel of expressing ones
idea on a particular topic clearly, and properly. In
other to score a good mark in a composition, one
must start very well and at the same time, end very
well. The compositor must arrange his points paragraph by paragraph so as to present a reasonable
outlook and at the same time convince the reader or
the examiner, so that he/she will become an expert
in essay writing.
If this important objective is not achieved, the
essay may not be interesting which will result t o a loss
of make.
Below is an example of a good composition. The
topic is "Benin Village of Tomorrow"

BENIN VILLAGE OF TOMORROW
There are many in our country who idealise the
Village of Benin City. Kwaki was one of these, Philip
also had a yearning for the quiet countryside where
one could regetate and reminate to one's hearts content, and yet perhaps a few of us today would like t o
be permanent dwellers in a village. As a member of
Benin community, I would like to be swept forward
in the current of modern life even at the cost of
being somewhat dizzy with the motion. We d o not
want t o be left in the backwater of a n antiquated age
which constitute life in a village. No one will for a
moment, under-value the quietness, the sweatnesr,
and even the poetry tbat the greent fields, the blue

�skies, the colourful scenery -of a - v i l l a g e.hold up
before.aor eyes; But- mddera. lif&amp;--is.fwttj&amp;-activity.
There -is much to do an round, so much to
change and to build anew. In the past, man was
the slaves of an unkno*n destiny, !tie victim 01
change e\:ents. Today, :IS the poet sings 'man is
she master of all things,' and therefore man has
to nork inorder to build up a 'Brave new world'
which he feels is for him to make or to unmake.
The City and not the village, is the place bvhere
most. of this work can be done.
Villages, of course, cannot and must not be
abolished as long as the ear111 has to be cultivated
to give us our daily breLd, we will have villages,
s"al1 semi-self contained se~tlements where the
tillers of the soil live in close touch with the earth,
and in intimate and fruitfulco-opemtion with their
fellowmen, wha bring them help in many ways. But,
the village tomorrow will not be at all like the
village cf the past or exen of today. She will have
to b e unbanished. She will have to be something
between a viilage and s town -- a toHn in the
midst of orchard and gardem, and surrounded by
greet] corn field.
The first step towards this urbanisation is to
bring electricity to ekery cottage. Electricity will
remove the depressing darkness of rural evenings.
An illuminated night time will mean an extension
of the day, and therefore, an addition to the span
of human life. Not only will our homes look brighter,
we will have clubs and hbraries aud even contiuuation Schools, for our workers, Try to imagine an
electrified villsge booming with activities of all kinds,
p h y s i c a I and intellectual and the differences with

�the .village.~ ftodap.wil~.::bc.
.
at ,.once apparent.
Fortuo; telyiour hy n~:leqlrm multi-purpose scheme
Damode, Bhakra, Hirakud, fangabhadra. etc, will
soon carry electric p0wc.r to distant villages, und thus
transform thcm.
Rural economy rest on small cottage, icdustries.
The importance of artisan and the craftman, who
bring to bear upon his art a ~ craft the personal
d
touch the hereditary skill that makes for beauty
will always, remain. But electritication will also
lead to the setting up of small mqqhines which will
save labour and increase productio'n accorfing to
the law of economics. Dr. Chike Obi's ambitious
project of developing cottage Industries on the Russian model, may change the outlook in Benin villages
The cottage will have their small machines to mdnufacture parts that will go into a common pool to
a
th: miking of bigger mao~inery. T : wat:h iqdustary in China is organised on this plain.
4 modern village will have scope for many
new industries, like canning fruits pasturising milk,
producing butter, and so on. Necessarily these will
mean increased wealth for the village. They will
also meau more vital existence. They lazy indifference
of the village of today will be-substituted by a wide
awake, many sided outlook.
The Benin villagers of my dream will have all
the amenities of the city ~ i t h o u tthe dearincss that
goes with it. It will fell the stir of life without it's
fretful fever. It will nor allow nerves to become
frayed not the mind to become weary- It will cherish
betuty and peace as things to be valued, but not
at the expense of the Dynamic Urge which sweeps
us through the years change to change unceassily.
We are looking forward to the time when the completion of our river valley project will help us to
transform our village into garden town.

26

�Remember that we have there kinds of Eassy:.
I
Descriptive Easjy
2
Argumentative Eassy &amp;
3
harrative Eassy.
Whenever you wish to write a composition.
1 Try to think about what you actually want to write
2 Hold some neccessary and also interesting important phrases.
3 D o not forget that your duty in writing .cornpositian is to sdy all you know about the :opic
and not to change it.
4 Know the use of some parls of speech, such
as: Noun, Pronoun, Verb, Adverb, Adjective.
Preposition, Conjunction and Interjection.
5 Let your composition have a good beginning and
ending.
6 Check your your tenser whether present or past
tense stick to one tense.
7 Try to make your oucline or headline to enable
you to write briefly.
8 Avoid the use of big words for small w o r h
because by so doing, you are trying to make
youself a fool.
9 Do nct feil tbat when )ou use big or colloqual
words your are well educated.
10 Give a good pilragraph to enable people to
understand you.

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8

These are the example of "headlines" 10 use, if
you were asked to write a composition on the
"Stenographer"
Who is a Stenographer?
A Historical Note
Importance in modern Office
Qualification
Technical
Professional
Some general reflection
Conclusion
27

�7.
(a)
(b)

(c)

I 1.

When constructing an essay on ' Farming 4 s a
Career" use the following outlines:Farming generally applied to the cultivation
of the soil for raising food crops.
Gradually it came to mean organised production of all food material 'ncluding milk, poultry
h0n.y etc.
It's immense scope i n a large Agricultural
country like Niper,a.
It offers scope for variety s s well as large
scale production,
The worid shortage of food also is an incentive,
The educational side of farming is gaining
.
importance.
Modern farmiop is based on scientific vrincivles
Hence the necd for Agricul~ure ~ o l l e ~ eand
s
research Industries
These could be attached to big farm s o r located
in ao area of large scale farming operative
The organisatiooal side is all-important
Kinds of Organisation
Large scale farming to operative farming
Collective farming--these are different type ~f
organisation favoured in America, Indin and
China respectively. .
The India way sezk a synthesis of the Amercan and communist way
The basis of all is the supersession of manual
me~hodby mechanical appliances. The use of
tractors for cultivating the soil, of incubators
for hdtching egss etc.
Different Departments of farming: Agriculture
poultry, dairy, bean farming. Each has it's
specialised training. And includes not. only
scientific product~onbut of presertion as wellHence the scope for opening useful occupations
is very great.
What should be done so that farmiog would
develope more, in general.
Conclusion.
28

�If you want to write an easay oo "A College
Debate" use the following outlines:1,
2.
3.
4.
5.

Important of debate in modern times.
A debate described.
The subject matter.
The speakers
The chairman and other judges.

6

Voting

7.

Remarks by the chairman.
Judgement not on moral reflection or meaning but on points raised by the speakers.

"00

point" raised by the speakers.

8.
The result.
9.
Impressions.
Let me write a composition with these headlines so
that you will follow me quite well.
"A

COLLEGE DEBATE"

We are living in an aee of parliamentary democracy, We have to train ourselves to bc effective
speakm and ready debater$. A good debater must
be ahle to speak extempore, to aoswer the point
raised by the previous speaker, to state clearly with
reacons his own points of view, and to be able to
combine arguments that convince with appeals that
move the motions. FIe must not onlv speak fluently,
logically, and with eloquence, but he must excel
in the cut and thrust of debate in smart repartee
and good humoured rebuff. T o acquire masmy over
these, a good deal of training and practice is
neccessary. Hence in these days, debates often comdl~cted on parliamentry line have become a feature
OF college and eveD of school life.

29

�principles, ani dangerous in practice, and should
be forthwith abondoned. As the resolution mooted
a subje.:t on which feeling was running high, and
was couched i n rather provocaWe language, the
interest was great indeed and, u e back-benchers
gathered together in laree numbers i3 expectation
of a highly exciting debate.
On ihe due date, classes were suspended for
some time before the debate was takiog place and
the students filled into the college hall aod took
their seats, it wss apparent that a great deal of
lobbying nad already taken place, for the promergers
and the anti-mergers occupied opposite secrors of
th- hall, grouped i n compact bodies. The neutrals
not that there were many of them took there seats
as they were attracted by conveniecce o r fiendship.
The mover of the motion was allowed fifrecn
minutes i n which he spoke in support of his resolu!ion. He had come, prepared and he spoke concisely,
and pointedly. H: s:t f x t h th: genesis of the proposal, adduced arguments in support and explained
the powerful reasons against it. His was a balaced
speech. But not so speech of :the ssconder. It was
a fiery oration, full of personal attacks, scathing
criticism and withering scorn. And with that, the
atm0sphe.e suddenly became electric words, were
bandiee about noisy interruption proved strong counter attacks, crles of '~ithdraw' 'withdraw were
met with louder cries: of 'shame,' 'sbame.' Some
oi the spee~bes
showed high oratorical gifts, some
excdled inectite, orthers in argument, some spoke
with deliberation others with anergy. The chairman,
I must say, d'd his job admirably.

�3 e pulled up speakers who were too personal or
too irrelevant; he cooled down rising temperature
with untimely jest, in relaxing the prescribed tirnelimit for speakers, he wisely took the sense of the house.
After a full two hours debate, the mover was
called upon to reply to the criticisms made. From
the manner in which he disposed arguments that
had been raised against him, it was clear that he
-Mas a trained speaker. He made votes by promptly
accepting a verbal alteration suggested by one member
in an amendmeot which substituted the word 'Antinational' and 'angrous' by the less provocative
word 'wrong' and likely to be dangerous. I believed
that the acceptance of these sight changes was responsible for the overwhelming majority by which
tbe resolution declared carried. So, overwhelming
indeed was the vetd~t that a counting was not
considered neccessar y.

I am not a good or even tolerabie speaker myself. Perhaps that explains the admiration I felt for
the various qualities exhibited by many of my friends.
But my honest opinion is that many of the speakers
sbowed excellent promises, and if given the opportunity at last, some of them will impress large
audiences in the years to come.

AGREEMENTS
Agreement is a concord comformity, bargain o r
contract between a person, company or group of individuzls and the other starting clearly what and
how the person or persons agreed upon the matter.
An agreement must be duly signcd by the people
concernd, and their respective witnesses. Stamp
should also be affixed acc. rding to the nature of
agreement. The value of the stamp on an agreement depends upon the type of ageeement.

�There are two kinds of Agreements, One is a
"Written" agreement and the otber is a "Verbal
agreement:
AGREEMENT:
Verbal Agreemenst is the
one which is not written, but simply agreed upon
i n the presence of witness invied. At the moment, we are not concerned with verbal agreement,
but only a written one.

VERBAL

" DANGER" Of Verbal 4greement: Verbal agreem e x is not good and advisable in this age of modern
civ lisation and parliamentry democracy. People
could easily denv rhe other hence the agreement
was not jotted down. If such issue 1s taken to the
lnw court, the court is to fild it difficult to discover
the truth, hence nothing was written In the olden
days when people were God fearing and trustwor!hy,
verbal agreement was good and useful. During these
days, people were not educated and even there were
no
no schools at all. And in fact, they h ~ d alternative crder than verbal agreement. But now, let
us forget all about \ertal agreement, and rdhere to
the written one. Below is an example of a written
agreement.
"The agreement is made between Mr. Ikeotuonye Akpugbo and Albert Ibe" negotiating for the
sale of a motor car.
"Agreement b e t ~ e e nMr. Ikeotuonye Akpugbo
and Albert Ibe.
T o day being 29th Februarv, 1964, we Mr.
Ikeotuoove Akpougbo and Albert Ibe both of Nnewi
agreed as follows:-1, That a motor car, "E. 0. 7721" which fcrmerIv beloneed ro Mr. Albert Ibe has been sold to
~ r lke%uonye;Akpugbo at tbe cost of (£200) two
.
hundred pounds
2. Thsb hence the car has been sold to Mr Ike.
otuonye, Mr Albert has no legal claim over it again.

�That Mr. Ikeotuonye is the only person who
has a legal claim over the said car.
4. That all the documents relating to the said
car has been transfered to Mr. Ikeotuonye who
is the legal onner of the car.
5. That after Mr. Ikeotuonye, his family members
are to be the legal owner of the car.
6. That all the car documents bearing the same
of Albert remains valid, though Mr. Ikeotuonye
is the legal owner of the car.
7. Th3t if any one violated abuses or break this
agreement, he will be liable to a court action
and he is to pay a total cost of (£250) two hundred
and fifty pounds to the other excluding the
awardb of the court.
SIGNED: M . Ikeotuonye His signature.
r
Mr. Albert Ibe His signature.
In the presence of the following people as witnesses:1.
Chukwuemeka Onwuka His signature
I$
,*
2.
Wilberforc,: Onwuka
Tnis agreement is signed before me on this 29th
day' of February 1964.
SIGNED WILFRED I. ONWUKA
3

Typist and witness to the whole signature
Five shillings stamp affixed to make this agreement
absolutely valid.
Before you sign an agreement between you and
any person or company
1 Try to read it over and over for several times
2 Be sure that it was what you actually agreed
upon that was written
3 Study the whole phrases and clauses in that
agreement properly as they may carry a differem
meaning
4 Try to sigo it in the prestnce of the whole party
concerned.

�5. Be sure that it was not drafted by yourself alone.
And also be sur; that others signrd the agreement.
6. Be sure that it is read and interpreted in any
understandable local language. If possible, an agreement is supposed to be signed berore a lawyer or
a legrl expcrt.
Be io case a vendor or purch-ser is an illiterate
or not properly educated, let him or 18er p r o d ~ c z
his or her closed educated relative to read and interpret
the words of the agreement fix him. This is to
ascertain that the whole people concerned knew the
actual contents of the agreement befor sloging it
or affixing their thumb print.
TELEGRAMS
A telegram is written urgent message frorne one
person to another, in the most shortest and precisent form. The amount of money lo be pald to
the post and telegrm dcpertmeni depends largely
upon the number of the words in the telegram.
How to draft a telegram: If one wishes to
draft a telegram, one must try to draft in the
most shortest form inorder to avoid paying heavy
amount of money.
T o show you what a telegram is, let me send
a telegram to Margret lkemefuna who is now for
holidays at Sokoto and it bappens that ,on
school will suddenly reopen on 29th Jaouary, 1964.
But, she did not know before. The telegram will
reads as follows:-

Margret I kemefuna
, Box 2 Sokoto
Proceed school summoned 19th January
Tbis telegram contains, only 10 words, and the
person who is sending the telegram will have to
pay about 216 to the post and telegram department.

�HOW TO SPMK .lW

PUBLIC

1 How to use your voice.
It is very important to know how to use y5mr
voice properly when speaking in public.
2 A few simple exercise can be recommended
for a person.
3 As a matter of fact everybodyuses the riddle
po:tion of the voice for ordinray conversation

4 You must also remember that the mouth should
be well opened and the teeth apart otherwise
your voice well.

5 In the first place there is the position of the
speaker to ,be considered

6 If the occasion happens to be a wedding, break-

fast, a dinner party, there wo4d be no plantform
from which to speak.
7 A simple start in this way would be imposible
for a local parliament which must have a fzir
:
number of me.nbers if it is to b a success.

8 This wonderful power of linking together words
or facts uhich appear to have no relationship
9 Tkere are many other examples in our language
of fine differences between words one of the
most abused examples being the popular confusion between want and need.

10 This last point is indeed the essenst
matter a couple of friend.

of the

�CONTENT VERBS
To beat, To Hit, To Strike, To Kick, To Pucnh

be a t
bear
beaten.

hit
hit
hit

strike
struck
struck

kick
kicked
kicked

punch
punched
punched

.
*.-

Look at the following sentences:
1 John beats his donkey, (with his hand)
2 His father beat him. (with a strap (or) piece
of leather)
But. 1. Tom hit Henry (with his hand)
2. Tom struck Henry (on the face, with his hand
3. Albert kicked Joe (on the leg, with his foot
4. Henry punched Sam with his fist, as i3 boxing
or 1. Tom hit the ball at tennis
2. Sam kicked the ball at football
Also Sam beat Joe at tennis, at boxing; ie
:.
Sam won and Joe lost.

.

DRILLS

A. Ask and answser the following questions:Example:

Q. Did Tom hit Jim on the nose?
A. Yes, he did.
1. Did Joe beat Henry at tennis?
2. How did Charles hurt John's foot?
3. What does your father do to you when you
behave badly.

�4 How is the man cruel t~ his '~ousz?
5 What are you doirg with the football?
b Does Albert hit tbe ball hard at tennis?
7 Where did Herbert strike his nei,:hboor?
8 What is the servant doing to the carpet?
9 What did you do to make your brother?
10 How did you hurt your eves?
B But in the missing word and then reDear the sentence as a w h o k -

George. the ball into the goal
,
the other boy on the nose
Sam
Henry..........the dog with the whip
Oscar............his school mate in the face with his
open hand.
Richard .........-.a nail in the wall
We.......... the visiting school at football
f
You should never -...... anyone smaller than yoursel
You can, ......a golf ball more than three hundred
yards
My carpet needs ...........
10 He .-.... me with his book
GAMES SPORTS GYMNASTICS
NOTE:

1 To play games, I play football, or To go
in for games or I go In for football
2 To go in for spots. I 40 in for boxing
(shooting, riding, etc.)
or 1 box, (I shoot, I ride, etc.

�3 To do gymnastics; or. tn go.in-.fclrgymntistiW
GAMES

footblll
tenis
tabletennis
basket-ball
cricket
to play c.r hockey
to go in for squash
golf
polo
chess
cards
backgammon

SPORTS

box ., .
ivrestle.
swim
run
jump
to ride
shoot in fcr
hunt
walk
fish
skate
ski

.$aki'$g.

.+resrfia$
.syirnmi@
rur~ning
jumping
to go ridink
shooting
hunting
walking
fis;:ing
skatinp
sking

DRILLS

A.

Ask and answer the following questions: -

EXAMPLES:-

Q. What does George do?
A. He plays tennis, or he goes in for tennis
Q. What does Thomas do?
A. He boxes, or he goes in fbr boxing.

1 What does Tom do?
2 What does Joscph do?
3 What does Henry do?
4 What does George do?
5 What does Albert do?
38

( tennis )
( table tennis)
( swimming )
( cricket )
( boxing )

�6 What does Herbert do?

(walking)
(basket-ball)
(chess)
(skating!

7
8
9
10

What
What
What
&amp;hat

B.

Ask and answer the following questions:Example:-

Q.
Ans.

does Mary do?
does Robin d o ?
does Richard do?
do you d o ?

( 7)

Does Sam ride?
Yes, he rides, or Yes, he does.
No, he stGims, or No, he doesn't ride, he swims.

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9

Does Alfred s ~ i m ?
Does your brother go in for boxing?
Does Arthur skate? ( N ........................tennis)
Does George play back gammon? No .,.
.
chess
Dots your friend play cricket?, No ............ ..swimming
'Does your father shoot? No .............................. working
Does Charles play basket-ball? No ..................skating
Does Henry fish?
No ...................... hunting
Does James go in for hunting?
10 Do you go in for golf?
MEANS OF TRAVEL

T o go by Train, Bus, Boat, etc.
Look at the following sentence?:-

1 The best way to get to the cinema from here is
to go by bus.
2 He went there on a dookey.

�NOTES:We,.g~.._by,
vehicle, by train,_:&amp; bus. by
car, by bicy.cJei.:,by aeroplane, b y . train,, ets.
But we go on foot, on horse-back, on a donkey,
on a camel.

A.

Ask and answer the following questions:-

Q. Is i t quicker to go on foot or by car?
Ans.

It is quicker to go by car.

1 1s it cheaper to go by car or on foot?
2 Is it more comfortable to go on a horse or by train

s
3 T it quicker to go by plane or by boat?
4 Is it more comforti ble to go by bicycle or by car?
5 Is it cheaper to go on a donkey or by car?
6 Js it cheaper to go by planc or by car?
7 Is it quicker to go by carrlage or on foot?
8 Is it pleasant to go by bus or by train?
9 Is it noiser to go by train or on a horse?
10 Is it dirtier to go by train or by plane?
b.

Ask and answer the following questions:

Q.

D o rich people usually go by car or on a donkey?

Ans. They go by car.
40

�Q. To get to the other end of the street, Would yau
go by train or on foot.
Ans.

I should go on foot.
To get to England from America, would you go
by boat or on a horse?
Do people in the very North of Europe go on
camels or on foot?
Do more people travel by train or by plane?
To get to n Londbn house from the office would
you go by bus or on a camel?
To get to South Africa from Egypt, would you
go by plane or by train?
To get from New York to tbe pacific coast of
America, would you go by bicycle or by train?
Do people in Denmark go short distances go by
bicycle or by aeroplane?
Do you come to school on foot or by car (If
neither, how)
To get to the next town, would you go on foot
or by boat (If neither, how)
Do every poor people go by car or on foot.?
Do you prefer to travel by boat or by plane.
To get to the top of a mountain, would you go
on foot or on a horse.
To cross a lake, would you go by bus or by
bicycle. (If neithx, how)
To have a healthy holiday in the country, would
you go by plane or on foot.
Do villagers in the Near Easter travel on donkeys or by car.

�Tocome, To go, T o walk. To run. To ritlc etc.

(It is adviseable tnat this,Section be done in conjuction with the previous one si Ice the two are very
closely connected.

...

1 :. I came here by car..
2 1 went there by car.
3 I walked there. as it was nof far.
4' t ran' there, as there wa.s fi'ftle time.
.5. 1 ; rode there,-as my friend was nb!e to take me
in his car..

XOTE-

"The 'most 'common verbs of mot~on or
movement are to come and to go. We can use them
'('with or without. the helpof adverb phrases)to express,.any k i n d of motion -(see 'Means of Travel'
p, 94.) Thus you can sav. "I came (or went) by car
(or bybus, by train, by boat, on foot, etc.)

Never say, 'I rode here in a car.', Say either
necessary to mention what kind of vehicle it was,
simply" .'I rode here.'
"I walked here" and 'I came here on foot"
mean very nearly the same thing. I came here on
foot, ,may also mean I ran here. Do not mlx their
two expressions up. Above all, never use the verb
*to run for anything except fast motion on foot.
( T o run can be used in other way, but it is safer to
keep t o its chief meaning.)
Other verbs of motion that you may sometimes
-peed a r q l . t o sail, to drive, to swim, to row, to
.
'march' to fly. Do.,,not use any adverb phrases to
make the meaning clear. The complete meaning is
':already iWfhe verbs.
,

�Ask and ioswer the following questions:-

Examples:
.Q. How would you go if you h a . d no money?
A. If I had, no money I should walk, or I should

go

00

foot.

Q. How would jcu gel across

a lirte boat \kith oars?

A.

2

lake if you had

I should row across it

How would you get across a river if there
were no. bridge and )ou had no boat? ,
2. How would yo.1 g,) from India to England if
you were in a hurry and had plenty of moncy?
3. How would you reach the polic station in
the next strect if somebody had juht been
. murdered?
4 Hou would you get to your work. if it ,were
:
too fdr to walk?5. How would a co n p n j of 'soldiers get to the
next town if they were alt on foot?
6. How would you go from Europe to the far
East if you waated a pleasant journey of about
five weeks? .
7. How would you go donn rbe river Nile if
there were n6 steamer or motor boat.
8. How shodd you go across France if you were
by yourself and had a car?
9. - How would you go from Paris to Rome if
you want ihe quickest way?
10. How would go if you waated to spend an
afternoon in the park?
1.

�11

12
13

14

15

How would go up a .river if you had
a small sailing boa ?
How woald you get to rhe fire station if a
fire broke out io o u r house and there were neither
telephones nor L , chides of nny Kind.
How would you go about if you were in the
country and had a house?
8 o w would you go i t the place you wanted
to reach is only a a d z awav and had a
bicycle.
How would you get if )ou w &amp; @ d to to get
to one end cf L o c d o ~ , frc m the other the
quiekest way

TO FIND, TO FOUND
fiad
found
found

found
founded
founded

Look at the following Sentences:-

1 I found a shilling in the street
2 1 cannot find my hat

3 The letter was founded amoung the rubish.
4 Mr. Smith's fathe'r founded thz business
5 The business was founded by Mr. Smith's hther.

NOTE
T o find has the sense of to discover, to come
upon. The past tense is found and the passive
.
infinitive is to be found.
T o found has the sense of to start. We use it
especially of such thing, as building (schools
hospitals) aud business. The past tense is founded
and the passive infinitive is to he founded.

�Never mixt the two r*ord~ up. to find is a wry
common word and to found no1 a very common
word.

DRILLS

A.

Ask and answer the following questions:-

Example:

Q. Wculd you find o r found a pocket-book?
A. You would find it.
, Would you find or found a long lost friend?
l

2 Would you
your food?
3 Would you
own.
4 Would you
5 W o d d you
6 Would you
,ticket?
7 Would you
8 Would you
9 Would you
10 Would you

find or found a bite of dirt

in

find or found a big shop of your
find or found a letter on the table?
find or fouod a home for old people?
find or fouod an unused ra~lway
find or found new museum?
find or found the way home?
find or found a dog in your garden?
find o r found an old shoe?

8. Complete each of the folbwiog sentences putting
i n the correct form of, to find or to found. Repeat
each of the sentences as a whole.

�Example:

I have.......................a fly in my glass.
A I have found a fly in my glass.

Q

1 If I had enough money, 1 should ............a house
for the poor children.
2 He............
the key he thoupht he had lost in his
trouser pocket.
3 I cannot
any rest here.
4 Haven't you ................ your pen yet?
5 Lord stop shire
the club fifty years ago
6 I cannot ................ the answer to the question
7 Whsre wai the baby .............................?
8 Charles Dickens ......................
that newspapers.
9 He.................. gold watch in the Gar
a
10 Tne society was....
by the president.
11 Can't you ..---..". any thing to d o ?
13 Hasn't he............ anything to do?
13 If you turn left you will ..........thz buildin: opp6site you.
14 Your hopes are
on sand
15 Diamonds are ,................in South Africa.
To Discover, To Invent,

discover
discovered
discovered

To Explore

invent
invented
invented

explore
explored
explored

Look at the following senteoces

A I Cbristopher Columbus discovered America.
2 The driving power of s!eam was discovered by
Hero of Alexandra.
B I Trevethick invented the Railway eogioe.
2 The aeroplane was invented by the Wright Brothers
C I Mungo Park explored the river Niger after
discovering it.

�2 After discovericg the new land, the men explored
it and so learned many interesting things about it.

NOTE:
T b -disk&amp;er ineans%oEnd or' t o - find a thing or a
place :for ~ht&amp;sr t h e .. .
~o'jnvent:
means to think out something:newl
T o cxplere:- .fleans to travel through a. strange place
and learn something about it.

DRILLS
A. Ask and answer the following questions:Example:
Q Who discovered Hawaii
A Captain C o ~ k discovered Hawaii
Cook did

or Captain

1 Who discovered disease germs? (Pdsteur)
2 Who discovered the River Niger'! (Mungo Park)
3 Who discovered Tutankhomen's tomb? (soward
Carter)
4 Wllo discovered the malaria-carrying mosquito? Ross
5 Who discovered the sea route to I n d ~ a ?
(Vasco Da
Gama)
6 Who discovered a cure for smallpox? (Jenner)
7 Who discovered the Victoria Falls? (Livingstone)
8 Who discove~ed the heavenly
body Uranus?
(Herschel)
9 Who discovered r.rdium as a cure for certain
disease ? (Curie)
10 Who discovered the reason why bodies fall to
earth? (Nowton)
47

�B.

Ask and answar the following questions:-

1 Who ivented a printing press in Europe (Gutenberg)

2 Who iovented a way of makinn steel? (Bassemer)
3 Who invented the first practical steam engine?
(Savery)
4 Who invented the cotton gin? (Eli Whitoey)
5 Who inlented the sewing machiw? (Howe)
6 Who invented the telegraph'! (Morrison)
7 Who invented long distance wireless telegraphy?
(Marconi)
8 Who invented the telephone? (Graham Bell)
9 Who invented electric lightine? (Edison)
10 Who inveoted the safety lamp for miners? (Davy)
C. Ask and answer the following questions: I Who explored some of the coldest parts of the
world? Shackleton
2 Who explored parts of "vlexico? Cortes
3 Did Columbus explore America after discovering
it? (No)
4 Have you ever explored any of the ancient Egyptain
temples?
5 Have you ever explored your village?
6 Have you ever explored-the capital of your coun~ry?
7 Have you ever explored the desert?
8 Has the whole world been explored yet?
9 Have you ever explored any old buildings?
10 Wbich part of the world would you like to exploref

�TO LeARPJ, TO FIND OUT, TO KNOW

You learn a subject
Thus, I am learning French
You fin3 out information
Thus, I found out his name
(You can often use to learn instead of to find out
'Thus, "I learned his name.")
You know something you have already learned or
foun dout. Thus, 1 knowmy own language (Because I
learned it as a child.)

DRILLS
Put the correct forms of to learn, t o find . out, or
t o know in each of the following sentence and then
repeat each sentence as a whole:Example:
Babies must ....... .how to walk
Babies must learn how t o walk
I am ~ o i - g o the station to..................
nt
when the train
.starts
I am goiog to the station to find out when the
train starts.
Fish ......- how t o swim
Fish know how t o swim.

�A' ' g o d teacher ......how to keep hi*'pupi.ls:.in
2 We are now .........
English
1

order

3 Have you ever - .. ..Russian?
4 Do you ...........
Russian?
5 Can you ...........if he is coming
6 Birds............
how to fly
7 Yesterday I ............ a pzom by he@
.* .

8 I
it so well now that I cao say it backwards
9 A successful business man .......... how to make 'money
10 You must ............... her address tomorrow
I I Please.......... whether he still has my watch
12 They................. that I do not believe them
13 I have ........how to do it now
how to do it now?
14 Do you ............
15 You

me very well

16 He was drowoed because he did not ..... how to swim
17 He was drowned because he had not .....how to swim
18 Most people......how to ride a bicycle very quickly
19 I want to......where ought to go
...........
20 I have forgotten where it is, but once 1
what has happened to him
21 Nobody
22 It is the business of the police to.......... who committed the crime.
my friend, don't you?
23 You
24 Have you ...... the lesson?
25 There isnot enough time to ............the trick
26 D o you ......
where I can get one?
27 I came to see you but..- that you had gone out
how to do it
28 It took us a long time to
29 All English children in secondary schools .....French

50

�30 W e you - sta+.qhool you---how
hn
to speak
31. He' hasn't'been able t........:....what they are doing
6:
32 You are wrong: I...... -..-it docs not cost as much
as that.
33 Would you mind ............, if the cat is still in the
house.
34 I don't.,.
,...
how to tell you.
35 You will have to..
,
- to be more polite.
TO Drown, TO be Drowned, To Sink, To F l a t .

sink
drown
drowned sank
drowaed sunk

float
floated
floated

Look at the following sentences:.

1 Many men were drowned when the boat sank
2 The man sank and rose again to the surface
of the water.
3 The ship was sunk by the guns of the enemy.
4 Iron sinks: wood floats.
5 The man drowned his cat.
5 The man drowned himself

Note

To
To
To
To

drowned to cause death by water.
be drowned: to die by water.
sink: to disappear below the surface of water.
float: to remain on the surface of the water
51

�Ask and answer the following questions -

I How many men *ere drowned when the boat sank-?
2 How ixany won en drowned nhtn.the beat sank?
3 How many childrendrowned uhen the boat sank?
4 Wer, many of the crew drowned when the boat sank?
5 Did the ship sink in deep water?
6 Wtere did the ship sink?

7 Why did the ship sink?
8 By whom was the battle zhip sink?
9 W h ~ did the crew do when the ship began to sink?
t
10 Why did ihe man drown the rat&gt;?
11 Why did the man drown himself?
12 Will you be dromned if you cannot swim?
13 Where was he drowned?
14 Were many people drowned in the flood?
15 Would yo11 help a man who was drcwnin,?
16 Does a paper sink or floot?
17 Does gold sink or floot?
18 Do heavy metals sink or floot?
19 Does cork sink or floot?
10 Does rubber sink or floot?
,To be Born, To Die, To be Dead.

die

died

die

�Look at the fdtewing sentencee:
1

2

3
4
5

-

My brother was born before I was.
William Shakespeare uas born in 1564 and died
died in 1616.
Napoleon died in 1821.
He is wearing black clothes because his father
has just died.
H i s father is not alive; he is dead.

DRILLS
A. Ask and answer the following questions:-

Example

Q. When were yog born.
Ans. I was born in 1921 or I was born-years

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

ago.

When was Napoleon born? (1759)
When was Harounal Rashid born? (1786)
When was Louis Pasteur born? (1812)
When was Peter the Great born? (1672)
When was Ahmed Shawki, the famous Egyptian
poet born? (1853)
When was Mar:oni born? (1874)
When was Galizo born (1564)
When was Sir Issac Newton born? (1642)
When was Thomas Edison born? (1864)
When was Tennyson, the Fmglish poet born (1852

�A.

Ask and answer the following questions:-

Q. Where were you born?
Ans. I was born in Egvpt.

1 Where was your king born?
2 Where was Shakespeare born? (England)
3 Where was Victor Hugo born? (Fmnce)
4 Where was Nelson horn? (England)
5 Where were your brothers horn? (England)
6 Where were your parents born?
7 Where were your uncle born?
8 Where was Alexander the great born? (Maccdon)
9 Where was Plato born? (Greece)
10 Where was Voltarie born? (France)
b.

Ask and answer the following questions.
Example:-

Q. When did Swift, the English writer, die?
Ans. Swift died in 1745.
I When did Queen Victoria of England die? (1901)
2 When did Alfred the Great die? (1626(
3 When did Francis Bacon die? (1901)
4 When did Lord Beaconsfied die? (1881)
5 When did Marco Polo die? (1323)
6 When did Duke of Marlborough die? (1722)
7 When did Marie Antoitte die? (1793)
8 When did Philip V of Spain die. (1746)
9 When .did Rousseau die (1778)
10, When did James Watt die (1819)

�Q. Is he dead?
Ans. Yes, he is died

Q. Hai he dead
Aos. Yes, he has died.

or Yes, he is.
No he is not dead
or No he is not (isn't)

or Yes, he has.
No he has not died
or No he has not (hasn't)

Is
Is
3 Is
4 Is
I

2

Julius Caesar dead
Christopher Co!umbus dead
Cleopatra dead.
Hitler dead?
Has Hitler died?

I. We only use this form of people who have been
living recently.

5 Is your father dead?
6 Is Marco polo dead ?
7 is Aristotle dead?
8 Is Shakespeare dead?

Has your father died?

TO SAY, TO TELL.
Look at these sentences:

A.

I said to him, "I shall return soon." (Direct speech)

I told him that 1 shall return soon.
NOTE:-

(Indirect speech)

1. Change sly to (said to) into tell (told)
when changin direct into indirect speech

�2. When you use tell (told) in Indirect"kpeech, it
must be followed by the name of person by a personal pronoun.
Now look at these sentences:-

B. He said, "I am angry" (Direct speech)
He said that he was angry (Indirect speech)
When turning D~rectinto Indirect speech
do not change say (said) unless it is followed by
the name of a Person or a ~ersoni1"pronon.
NOTE:-

DRILLS
A.

Ask and answer the following questions:-

Example:-

Ans.
I

Q.

What did he say when you shouted?

He said that he was not deaf.

What did he say when you came late?

: What d ~ d say when vou gave him the book?
he

3
4
5
6
7

What did they say when they heard the news?
Who said that there would be a holidays soon?
Who said that there would beno lessons tomorrow
Who said that the war would end soon?
Did you say that you were sad.
8 Did you sav that you were happy
9 When did he say he would return
10 Why did you say that' you would not come.
B.

Ask answer,the following questions:-

1. What did he tell you when you said that you
had failed.
2. When did you tell his father that he was in need
of money?

�3 When did he tell you itre gaod newsZs
4 When did he tell his father that he was i~ need
money?
5 Who told you that there would be holidays soon?
6 Who told him to work hard?
7 Why 'did you tell him t o go away?
8 Why did you not tell him what had happened?
g Did he tell you that he was ill?
10 Did he tell you that he was going to England soon.
MOTE:-

2
3
4
5

The verb 'te tell' is also used as follows:-

T o tell a story.
T o tell the truth.
To tell a lie.
T o tell the time.
T o tell one thing from another.

DRILLS
A. Ask and answer the following questions:1 Who told you that story?

2
3
4
5
6
7
8

9

10
11

When did he tell you that story?
Did he tell you an interesting story?
Why did you tell lie.
Was he punished for telling a lie?
Will you be believed if you always tell the truth.
Do newspapers always tell the truth.
Can you tell the time of his arrival.
Who told you the time of his arr~val.
Can you know a good book from a bad one.
Can you know a horse from a cow.

�12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19

20

Can you tell the difference from a pen and pencil.
Do you tell lies?
Do you always tell the truth?
Can you tell me an amusing story.
Can you tell the difference between a boot and
a shoe.
Can you tell me the time of his departure.
What happens to people whp tell ties.
Are people who tell the truth honesty.
Does your teacher tell you stories.
.

TO HEAR, TO LISTEN.

Look at the following Examples:-

1 I heard him speaking but was too tired to listen
to him.
2 Listen to what I say.
3 You should always listen carefully to what your
teacher is saying.
4 I listened to his speech but did not hear any
thing I have oot heard before.
5 I have just heard the sound of a gun.

When you listen to a person talking, you will
not only hear him but you also pay attention to
what he is saying. You can hear a person talking
without paying attention to what he is saying.

NOTE:-

�Drills
(a) . A k and answer the following questions :
s
-

1. Can .you hear the rain beating zgainst the
windows.
2. Cim you hear what I am saying?
3. Did you hear the noise of the children
phyirig?
4. Can deaf people' hear?
5. Would you sit near a speaker 0:: far away
from him if you wish to hear him?
6. Can you hear the noise outside?
7. Can you h+ir the wind blowing?
8. Have you ever heard a .great mao's speech?
9. Can you always hear well when someone is
10. Have you ever heard birds singing?
(b) . Ask and answer the following pestions :
I. Did you listen to what he was saying?
2. D o you always listen to what ycur teacher
is saying.
3. D o you always listen to t!le acvice your
father gives you?
4. D o you listen to his speeches?
5. What will happen.if you do not listen to a
person when he is spe3king to you?
6. Did you listen to the music which was played
last night7
7. Did you listen to him when he was telling
you a story?
8. Will you remember what your teacher says
if you do not listen to him?
9. Can you hear a person without I'steoing to
speaking to you over the telephone?
him ?
10. D o you like listening to a good speaker?
59

�TO catch,

to take,

to obtain,

to re;eived

receive
obtain
received
obtained
obtained
received
Look at the following sentences :
(A)
I. I caught tbc which he threw to me.
2. I stayed in bed all lasbweek because I
tad caught cold.
3. The policeman ran after the thief but could
not catch him.
catch
caught
caught

take
took
taken

I. Take this and don't ask for more.
2. I gladly took the money which he gave me.
3. 1 have forgotten to take my books with me
when 1 went our.
( c ) 1. I obtained high marks in my last examination.
2. You can obtain all kinds of food at grocer's
3. He obtained d l the money he needed from
'
his father.

(B)

When did you receive that letter?
2. Did you receive the book I sent you yesterday.
3. As soon as he he received my money, he
sent me a receipt.

(D) I .

Drills
(a ) . Ask and anlwer the following questions :
EXAMPLES :

. ( q ) Did you catch the apple as it fell from the
tree?
( a ) Yes, I caught apple as it fel! from the tree,
or yes, I did. '
No, I did not catch the apple asi'it fell from
the tree, or no, I did not/l didn't.

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HOW TO STUDY
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ions, Compositions,
AGREEMENTS, BETTER
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LETTERS

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                <text>How to study and write good letters, applications, compositions, telegrams, agreements, better sentences, important letters, speaking in public and teach yourself good English</text>
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                <text>Onwuka, Wilfred</text>
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                <text>Onitsha market literature</text>
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                <text>Onitsha, Nigeria : Gebo Brothers [and] Students' Own Bookshop</text>
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                <text>1964?</text>
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                <text>This pamphlet is another how-to guide described as a "New Grammar Book" in the preface. The author, Wilfred Onwuka, is also listed as a "compositor, poet,novelist and dramatist." He is referred to as "Master of Pen." Written mainly for "senior primary and students in the secondary schools," Onwuka notes that his aim of the pamphlet is to contribute "&lt;em&gt;my quota towards the educational building, progress and development of Nigeria and the world in general,&lt;/em&gt;" (pg. 3).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;This pamphlet has morals and political statements within sample letters. Onwuka's creations include disappointment with a sister's behavior, the business dealings of an offshore company, and a request to join a different political party because the Nigeria People's Party is "foundalistic and squandamenic," (pg. 18)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Onwuka's section on love letters offers advice about writing letters "when playing the game of love" (pg. 20). One sample written by a woman named Esther professes her own beauty and willingness to spend [i.e. make purchases] on behalf of her lover, (pg. 20). The response, from Gabriel, suggests an expectation of sexual relations "for the game of love", but not intercourse, since the practice often leads to pregnancy. This is an example of safe sex with "a Modern Girl" in Nigeria, c. 1962. &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;In another sample exchange between greedy Paulina and a mournful Rufus, the author demonstrates that heavy demands placed on a lover can cause dire results, when Rufus rejects Paulina's demands for Christmas presents that will "liquidate" him, (pg. 22-23). "Love is equal", argues Onwuka, and Paulina's failure to offer condolences to Rufus after the death of his mother is cited as an egregious oversight, (pg. 24).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt; Other sections of this pamphlet explain how to write composition, agreements and telegrams. The last section of the pamphlet contains drills and exercises to improve readers' grammar and vocabulary.</text>
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